Iqra Bismi Rabbika

2010

2010-05-16T01:58:00.003-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

I can't believe I started this blog SIX YEARS ago! SubhanAllah...time flies :)

Today I was in the doctor's office getting a glucose test done since inshaAllah I am expecting my first child (A GIRL!) in about three months, and I got a message that stated someone had commented on my blog. I was kinda surprised to be quite honest, seeing as I forgot this thing existed, but since I had an hour to kill (the glucose juice thing has to go through your system for an hour) I began to read all of my previous posts.

After reading just about every post I ever posted, I realized some things. Number one, your youth and free time is something that is SOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO precious. I know I'm not exactly classified as the elderly right now, but I'm now 25 with a ton more responsibilities than I had say, six years ago. The amount of time you can dedicate to yourself, your deen, your friends, your community, everything, is just incomparable in your youth. If you look at any great movement at any time, it was spearheaded by the youth. Unfortunately as we get older other obligations begin to weigh us down, so much so that the level of independence we experience in our college years is no longer applicable in our every day lives. Of course this is no excuse whatsoever, I know it is my obligation to be of service to this deen, but I feel it is no longer as easy as it was for me say a couple of years ago. So those of you that are still in those years where you can chillax, take advantage of your time :)

May Allah always allow the fire of faith to burn inside us all.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

back attack...

2008-11-18T14:46:00.003-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

I am back. I think...

To attempt to rehash all that has happened in my life would just take up too much time. So I'll just start with today, and hopefully you can fill in the blanks for yourself...

I am currently teaching 6th,7th, and 8th grade English in an Islamic School. The past two weeks have been quite interesting to say the least. Just moments ago, one of my sixth grade students was wheeled out of the school in a stretcher and is being taken to the ER. Why you may ask, well allow me to enlighten you. As one may know about young rambunctious boys, is that they find any opportunity to hang off anything. So when this young gentleman was supposed to be making wudu in the bathroom he decided to attempt to hang from the door frame, however his hands were still wet from wudu (duh) and he FELL. STRAIGHT ON HIS FACE/HEAD. His lip began to bleed, and he formed a huge golfball-sized injury on his head...OUCH. Yeah...so this is what I deal with on a daily basis...pretty exciting huh :p.

Anywho I shall keep you updated on my ranting and raving...
until then.

Adios.
wassalamualaikumwarahmatullah.

Iraqi Kid Runs for Water...

2006-11-29T01:44:00.000-05:00

http://video.google.com/videoplay?docid=7451951590598438762&sourceid=docidfeed&hl=en-GB

Hajj

2006-11-28T02:00:00.000-05:00

Bismillah...

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

Sometimes Allah subhana wa ta ala extends to us each a means to
rectify ourselves and purify us of our sins and impurities. Often
times we have done nothing to deserve such mercy, but in His
Greatness, His Beauty, and His Majesty He still allows us in our
sinful states to return to Him.

Allah subhana wa ta ala has extended such an invitation to me and my
parents. InshaAllah on the evening of December 14th, 2006 I will be
departing from NYC to return back to His home to perform Hajj. Before
I set forth I would like to sincerely beseech you for forgiveness. I
would love to think that I have never done anything to hurt anyone,
but I know that is absolutely untrue. That is why I ask you for
forgiveness for both those actions that I committed intentionally or
unintentionally against you or those you love. I ask that you find
the mercy in your hearts to forgive me for such deeds, and that in
return Allah subhana wa ta ala open all doors of mercy and forgiveness
for you. If there is anything that I may have borrowed or taken from
you that you wish returned back to you pleeeease do not hesitate to
ask, and I will inshaAllah do what is in my power to return such
things back to you.

Lastly, InshaAllah you will all be in my duas, however if you have any
duas that you would like for me to make on your behalf, I will gladly
do so, so please send me in detail whatever it is and I will do my
best to make those duas throughout my journey. I ask that you please
keep my family and me in your duas, and pray that we return in a
purified state, and that Allah subhana wa ta ala accepts this Hajj and
makes it a means to grow closer to him and his beloved Messenger,
salalahua alayhi wa salam.

JazakAllah khair,
wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Maheen (Hina) Farooqi :)

new list..

2006-11-10T01:27:00.000-05:00

i need it...

so here it is

Things that make me :)

1. watching the news with dora lee and calling out the lotto numbers as they are falling out of that ball thingy (its not really gambling this way)
2. aqsa and her camera phone ;)
3. having a dream about being trampled in makkah, wake up, still feel pressure on me, only to realize that maghrib has decided to take a seat on my side
4. volleyball in the apartment
5. halaqa
6. post-halaqa ;)
7. myyyyyyy stuuuuuuudeeeeeeentsssss :) !
8. teaching / my cooperating teacher
9. my pops
10. my moms
11. my moms
12. my moms :)
13. wednesday nights with dora
14. iiiiiiiiiceeeeeeeee creeeeeeeeeeeeeeeaaaaam
15. bearded papas
16. having the subway come as sooooon as you step on the platform ...sigh...
17. psycho voice :) (thats for you moosy husain)
18. getting mail (REAL mail)
19. the nice doormen :) (they're like....60 years old)
20. the way ms musa says 'maaaaheeeen jaaaan' :)
21. cute random babies on the street that are bundled up so much they can't move ...aww...
22. people who hold the elevator for you :)
23. talkin about makkah/madinah/hajj :) :) :)
24. reminicing about good times...sigh...

2006-11-10T01:22:00.000-05:00

why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why why
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insignificant

2006-11-03T00:44:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

Have you ever been standing in salah, when all of a sudden a realization comes to you, and you feel like you've been punched in the stomach, the wind and life just completely sucked out of you? Today, just minutes ago, I was standing for Ishaa and reciting and all of a sudden my insignificant status hit me so hard that I literally choked up and my throat started to burn...

Insha'Allah in about 42 days I will be going on a very great journey, and each day as I think about it more and more, the more and more I decide what it would be like to not return. Each time I've thought about it I have only evaluated it according to my own thoughts and desires and relationships with individuals, and not vice versa. But for a moment, while I was standing in front of my Lord I realized that if by His will I did not return then, subhanAllah nothing would significantly change. Not for myself, and not for those around me.

In the past month or so I believe that I have become much more introverted. My contact and conversations with individuals has been very brief, curt, and limited, even those that I consider to be the closest to me. I don't quite know why this is happening, or what the ramification or repercussions of it are, but for some reason I have no desire to rectify these relationships to their prior state. Alhamdulilah it is not a state of depression as some may think it to be by the symptoms I've described, but I don't quite know how to identify it. But due to this lack of attachment to individuals (minus maybe my cat) I feel as if it is easier to let go of anything and anyone, which has left me feeling callous and numb and ultimately insignificant...

may Allah subhana wa ta ala fill the void in our hearts with His love and light...

wasalamualaikum wa rahmatullah..

Eid Mubarak :) and my new 'services'

2006-10-24T19:21:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

EID MUBARAK!

and in other news:

So after talking to many individuals and hearing the all too similar story about marriage and how they want to/their parents want them to/they need to follow the sunnah etc. yet have failed to find a suitable match, I have taken it upon myself to personally search out, or matchmake for my peers. Now now, don't laugh. It's true that I myself am not married, but i think that in no way should inhibit the process. The only awkward situations arise when the sister or her parents ask me, "if this guy is so great why don't you marry him", or my parents favorite line, "why do you hook up others before yourself". Apparently many of our parents' generation don't believe in a simple concept known as "compatibility" . My dad believes that any girl and any guy can marry if they compromise enough....i disagree :)

I have jump started the process and have currently attempted 3 matches (full fledge) and have some others up my sleeve. Any success? Well we'll have to wait and see inshaAllah :)

Anyway I ask for your duas, and any resources you may have. In fact we can pool our resources and help create a happy ummah :)!

Untiil then :),

Wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

2006-10-19T23:05:00.001-04:00

"Patiently, then, persevere - for the Promise of Allah is true, and ask forgiveness for your faults, and celebrate the praises of your Lord in the evening and in the morning." (40:55)

Goodbye Ramadan......

2006-10-18T01:59:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah..

So here we are in the last days of this blessed month, and somehow despite having the entire month to reap the benefits of, we sit here and wonder, once again, how time has just slipped through our finger tips. Its true, some of us have shed a lot of our old habits and have exchanged them for hours spent in remembring our Beloved. But it is in this month that we realize that despite the countless hours we may spend in His worship, it is never enough. We leave our salah wanting to stay in sujood just a little longer, we close our Qurans knowing that the it holds more wisdom than any other book can, and we end this month knowing that there is none other like it. As much as we would wish for Ramadan to stay, just a little bit longer, we realize that if every month were Ramadan it would be in our feeble nature to forget its greatness. So instead our hearts just long for Him, knowing that when this month ends we can stay on this path that we have treaded for the past weeks, yet knowing that without the abundant blessings and mercy that are prevelant in this month we might, just once again get lost.

So here we are at a loss of words. We head to the masjid day after day and notice the beauty of the jamaat, the beauty of the Quran, the beauty of the adhaan, and the perfection of Islam.

So here we are in the middle of the night. We see night not as a time to sleep, but a time where the rest of the world is asleep and at rest, and our hearts are alive, and our tongues moist.

So here we are in the last days of this blessed month. Bid it farewell in the sweetest of ways. If you knew that one of your most favored guests were leaving in a couple of days, you would spend every fleeting moment with them, attempting to create memories that would last far beyond the visit. In the same way, bid Ramadan farewell in the sweetest of ways, because this blessing just might not come again.

with your duas,
wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

there goes another blessing...

2006-10-10T00:29:00.000-04:00

there goes another blessing just like that

i am in LOVE

2006-10-02T01:43:00.001-04:00

asssalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

http://www.thehijabshop.com/jilbabs/

this .........is a jilbabi's dream come true.... subhanAllah :) too bad its ramadan and too bad i am trying to cut back on buying clothes...... :( but for those of you that would LIKE to know it is my birthday tomorrow (october 3rd), and i REALIZE it might be a task and a half to get it shipped by then so....i'll accept a belated present..or an eid present :) jk..

i put this up for all the jilbabis out there, or those that ::cough cough:: think jilbab is ugly- IN YOUR FACE :)

anyway i think i've had one too many khajoors :)

shout out to samish/veiled knight for the link :)

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,
your ukhti.

Special Moments in This Blessed Month!

2006-09-25T16:19:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

Shaykh Kamal (may Allah subhana wa ta ala bless and preserve him) informed us of certain times during the day in this blessed month that we should take advantage of. For the benefit of the masses I am going to share these blessed gems :)

There are three specific times in the day, during Ramadan, that we should make the most of. Make a special effort to take time out during these three times and dedicate them solely to Allah subhaanahu wa ta'aala.

The first is right before Fajr-- about 10, 15, or 20 minutes before it starts. We should wake up for suhur, eat first, then dedicate the rest of the time to 'ibaadah. At this time we should try to pray tahajjud salaah, recite Qur'an, and specifically make an effort to engage in muraqabah. The masha'ikh have said that the way to find Laylatul Qadr in this blessed month is to make sure that every night you wake up before Fajr and be certain that when the first ray of sunlight begins to emerge from the horizon, it finds you engaged in some act of 'ibaadah. He highly recommended muraqabah for this time, in addition to recitation of the Qur'an. Most, if not all, of you are living with someone else. Whether they're your parents/siblings, roommates, or your husband, either you have to wake up and prepare for suhur for someone or someone is waking up and preparing suhur for you. So even if you're not praying, be sure to get up at that time and take advantage of the few minutes, however many you'd like to dedicate, before Fajr, to doing some form of 'ibaadah. Do not let the sun rise this month without it finding you worshipping your Lord.

The second time that we should take advantage of is right before Maghrib, again about 10-15 minutes before it starts. This is a very blessed time for making du'a, and is actually one of the moments that are said to be times of acceptance. So if you're the one preparing iftar ;) then make sure you're done preparing 20 or so minutes before, so you can wash up and just sit peacefully and make du'a to Allah subhaanahu wa ta' aala, and ask Him for all the spiritual blessings you can think of... whatever you're working on, ask Him to grant you tawfiq in that, and beg Him to forgive you (and all of us!) and to bless you and increase you in your state of nearness to Him and your obedience to Him and your remembrance of Him. Just open your heart and pour its contents into a du'a to Allah. I believe he also recommended this time for muraqabah and remembrance, as it is a time of acceptance, so our hope is that Allah subhaanahu wa ta 'aala will accept any 'ibaadah we do in this time.

The third time is actually the very minute that Maghrib starts. He singled this moment out and said that we should try our best to be making du'a when this moment comes. I'm not sure why he singled this moment out, but I figured it must be pretty important if he made a point to mention it separate from the 10-15 minutes spent before Maghrib. Just be sure that this moment, specifically, finds you making du'a.

May Allah subhana wa ta ala grant us the tawfiq to make the very most of this blessed month :)!

Please keep eeeeeveryoneee (including me) in your duas!

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,!

pre Ramadan blues...

2006-09-19T02:44:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

I've tried to stop posting non-sensical random thoughts and stuff...but sometimes I just need to get it out. (sorry)

I don't know where to begin, nor do I know where to end. Ramadan is around the corner and each Ramadan I realize how much I need to work on myself...and today I was sitting and contemplating life, and it was one of those moments when I wished a rope would fall down from the sky and would lead me to my Beloved...

and then of course I thought about how I would present myself to Him, subhana wa ta ala...and ofcourse it made me analyze the amount of filth I've accumulated on my heart and my heart sank. This relationship between Allah and His servant is so simple, yet we make it so complex. We say we love Allah, we say we want to see Allah, we say we are IN love with Allah ....but.......

but what? But we're too lazy? But its too hard? But there are so many distractions?

These excuses seem so dumb here on paper (or the computer screen), imagine how stupid they'll sound on the Day of Judgment when you are actually standing there watching the scale tilt to one side....

but..........

I've seen many people in love and subhan'Allah its amazing...everything they do, they do for their beloved. People become selfless and put themselves and their needs second to that of their beloved....

then why is it that we continue to transgress against the source of all good, of all love- when all we want is to be in His presence and to attain His pleasure ...

:(

May Allah subhana wa ta ala allow us to attain His pleasure this Ramadan....

"And make You my one desire, and fill my heart with Your love, and make it resplendent with Your lights. And humble my heart with the power of Your greatness." - Shaykh Abu'l Hasan al-Shadhili

Shaykh Kamal

2006-09-15T19:44:00.000-04:00

30 DAYS - http://www.msany.net/icnyu/shuyukh/30%20Days.mp3
Ramadan and Questions- http://www.msany.net/icnyu/shuyukh/Ramadan%20and%20Misc.%20Questions.mp3

http://www.msany.net/icnyu/shuyukh/The%20Sunnah%20is%20not%20Sunnah.mp3

May Allah subhana wa ta ala bless and preserve him

Ramadan preperation

2006-08-27T13:18:00.000-04:00

assalamaulaikum wa rahmatullah,

Ramadan is coming up soon! Here is something i recieved from Munzareen (http://musaafir.wordpress.com).

Ramadan Preparation Program 2006

When the Prophet (sallallahu alayhi wa sallam) sighted the moon of Rajab (two months before Ramadan) he used to pray to Allah in the following words:
Allahumma barik lana fi Rajab wa Sha'ban wa ballighna Ramadan

O Allah! Make the months of Rajab and Sha'ban blessed for us, and let us reach the month of Ramadan (i.e. prolong our life up to Ramadan, so that we may benefit from its merits and blessings)
[Narrated by at-Tabarani and Ahmad]

21st – 27th August: "Wake up your Heart" Week

This week inshaAllah we'll work on "polishing our hearts" from the lazy state of summer vacation, so they would sparkle again like last Ramadan.
* Learn and recite Adhkar, Istighfaar & Tasbeeh every free moment of our time and learn their benefits.
* Focus on improving our relationship with Allah:
- By concentrating during prayer
- By reading articles and listening to lectures on the greatness and graciousness of Allah and how we should worship Him, about Jannah and what we get there if we leave this world in the right state.
* Learn the steps of Tawba and take a decision NOW to quit any sins we're committing.
* Polish the dust off our Quran and try to finish it all at least once before Ramadan,
* Buy a good Tafseer book so we'll know what we're reading
* Make a serious decision to be better Muslims this year
* Ask Allah to support us after showing Him we mean what we say in ACTIONS not just in words
* Quit smoking/ drinking
* Be regular in praying
* Stop using bad language and backbiting/slandering
* Lower our gaze
* Think about the purpose of Creation, meditate,
* Evaluate ourselves in the past year

28th August - 3rd September: Fasting & Quran Week

* Make up lost fasting days from last Ramadan starting this week,
* Those who don't have days to fast can start fasting Monday & Thursday to get physically conditioned for Ramadan.
* Start reading/ listening to Quran more each day,
* Start learning tajweed and reciting loudly at least 5 minutes each day,
* Focus on reading one chapter everyday with tajweed
* Try to finish the Quran before Ramadan.
* Remember to Keep up the activities from last week! :)

27 Aug – 3 September: Fajr / Zakah & Sadaqa Week

* Start praying Fajr on time (before sunrise!)
* Those who already do: add in at least a couple of Rakat before Fajr.
* Set aside your Sadaqa money
* Calculate your Zakah and decide where you're going to spend it (no obligation to give it in Ramadan, but do make your calculations this week to remind yourself.)
* Learn the Islamic rulings of Zakah so you're sure you're doing the right thing and spending in the right venues. (Sending to Lebanon is approved by Fatwa as a Zakah outlet).
* Learn the various ways of Sadaqa other than donating money (ex: good manners, teaching, lending your items, talking nicely about people behind their back, preparing food packages for the poor).
* Keep up the activities from the previous weeks! :)

4th–10th September: Night Prayer & Sunnah Week

* Start practicing Qiyam Al Lail prayer at least 3 times in the week,
* Start by adding in 2 Rakat after Isha before you sleep
* Advance into waking up 30 minutes before Fajr for the last 3rd of the night, you can read from your Quran during night prayer so you could finish the Quran.
* Start adding in 12 Rakat of Naafilah / Sunnah prayers in total to your 5 prayers daily as follows:
- 2 before Fajr,
- 4 before Dhuhr & 2 after it,
- 2 after Maghreb,
- 2 after 3esha, followed by 2 Rakat of Shaf' + 1 Raka of Witr at the end [NB: You might call it 3 Raka of Witr. We call the first 2 Shaf', but that's confused some people. It's a Maliki and Shafi'i thing, I guess]
* You can also start praying 2 Rakat of Dhoha everyday between sunrise and Dhuhr prayer.
* If you wait up reading Quran after Fajr until sunrise to pray Doha, this is the Thawab of an Umrah! Try it at least once on the weekend, and in Ramadan you can do it more often inshaAllah: imagine the Thawab of an Umrah in Ramadan!
* Keep up the activities from the previous weeks!

11th – 18th September: Connecting with Family & Friends week

Selat el Ra'hem [maintaining the ties of the womb] is a very important activity that could either multiply or erase your Thawab! So give it full attention this week!

* Compile small packages of simple Ramadan gifts of useful & educational material (booklets, tapes, stickers, kids books) and offer to everyone around you
* No food gifts please :p
* Call or email those who are far away to wish them a blessed Ramadan, start with those you don't like or those you haven't talked to in a while, this way you're sure of the great rewards.
* Keep up the activities from the previous weeks! :)

19th – 24th September: Duaa & Tawba Week – Ramadan Night Family Dinner
* Concentrate on reciting Istighfaar, Tasbeeh, Adhkar and Duaa for Allah to grant you and your loved ones the fast of Ramadan and accept it from you.
* Make a sincere Tawba and quit any sins we're committing.
* Try to finish Quran this week.
* Give Ramadan food packages to poor families [or the homeless on the streets!]
* Plan a simple family & friends dish party dinner to wait for the announcement for the night of Ramadan and be happy together receiving our beloved month.
* Keep up the activities from the previous weeks! :)

Bush is a loser...khalaas....

2006-08-22T11:47:00.000-04:00

Bush Tells Press U.S. Won't Leave Iraq While He Is President -- And Says He Won't Campaign in Connecticut

By E&P Staff

Published: August 21, 2006 11:55 AM ET
NEW YORK At a press conference this morning in Washington, D.C., President Bush declared, "We’re not leaving [Iraq] so long as I’m the president. That would be a huge mistake.” Bush leaves office in January 2009.

He also said, in response to a question about backing the Republican candidate for Senate in Connecticut --against Democrat Ned Lamont and Independent Joe Lieberman -- that he is "going to stay out of Connecticut."

Reminded that a reporter that this was his native state (he was born there), Bush replied, to laughter, "Shhh."

He explained further, "And by the way, we're -- I'm staying out of Connecticut because the -- the -- you know, that's what the party suggested, the Republican Party of Connecticut, and plus there's a better place to spend our money, time and resources."

Bush also tied Iraq to 9/11, and then backed off, when asked about the effects of the U.S. invasion as witnessed today.

"You know, I've heard this theory about, you know, everything was just fine until we arrived and, you know, kind of -- the 'stir up the hornet's nest' theory," Bush said. "It just doesn't hold water as far as I'm concerned. The terrorists attacked us and killed 3,000 of our citizens before we started the freedom agenda in the Middle East."

Asked by a reporter what Iraq had to do with 9/11, Bush replied, "Nothing, except for it's part of -- and nobody's ever suggested in this administration that Saddam Hussein ordered the attack. Iraq was a -- Iraq -- the lesson of September the 11th is take threats before they fully materialize, Ken."

Also on Iraq, Bush explained, ""The strategy is to help the Iraqi people achieve the objectives and dreams which is a democratic society. That’s the strategy. The tactics — now — either you say yes it’s important we stay there and get it done or we leave. We’re not leaving so long as I’m the president. That would be a huge mistake. It would send an unbelievably, you know terrible, signal to reformers across the region. It would say we’ve abandoned our desire to change the conditions that create terror."

Bush also said at the news conference -- held at the temporary press quarters while the old White House briefing room is being rebuilt -- that if the government in Iraq fails, it could turn the country into a "safe haven for terrorists and extremists" and give them revenues from oil sales.

He said he agrees with a top military commander that if the U.S. were to do so, "the terrorists will follow us here." Bush added those who want an immediate pullout from Iraq are "absolutely wrong." He says it "takes time" to defeat the extremists, but that the U.S. is going to "stand with" the government of Iraq, and with reformers across the region.

Despite all the grim news, Bush often acted in a very jocular manner. He also had a rare exchange with reporter Helen Thomas on the Lebanon conflict.

Asked by another reporter if he was frustrated by lack of progress in Iraq he replied: "Frustrated? Sometimes I'm frustrated, rarely surprised. Sometimes I'm happy. You know, this is -- this is a -- it's -- but war's not a time of joy. These aren't joyous times. These are challenging times. And they're difficult times. And they're straining the -- the psyche of our country. I understand that.

"You know, nobody likes to see innocent people die. Nobody wants to turn on their TV on a daily basis and see the havoc wrought by terrorists."

A partial transcript follows. To watch a full video of the President's press conference, click here

***

Q: Thank you, Mr. President. More than 3,500 Iraqis were killed last month -- the highest civilian monthly toll since the war began. Are you disappointed with the lack of progress by Iraq's unity government in bringing together the sectarian and ethnic groups?

BUSH: No, I -- I am aware that extremists and terrorists are doing everything they can to prevent Iraq's democracy from growing stronger. That's what I'm aware of. And therefore we have a plan to help them -- them, the Iraqis -- achieve their objectives.

Part of the plan is political; that is, to help the Maliki government work on reconciliation and to work on rehabilitating the community.

The other part is, of course, security. And I have given our commanders all the flexibility they needed to adjust tactics to be able to help the Iraqi government defeat those who want to thwart the ambitions of the people. And that includes, you know, a very robust security plan for Baghdad. We -- you may or not know, Terry -- have moved troops from Mosul Stryker Brigade into Baghdad, all aiming to help the Iraqi government succeed.

You know, the -- I hear a lot of talk about civil war. I'm -- I'm concerned about that, of course. And I've talked to a lot of people about it. And what I've found from my talks are that the Iraqis want a unified country, and that the Iraqi leadership is determined to thwart the efforts of the extremists and the radicals and al Qaeda, and that the security forces remain united behind the government. And one thing that's clear, the Iraqi people are showing incredible courage.

The United States of America must understand it's in our interests that we help this democracy succeed. As a matter of fact, it's in our interests that we help reformers across the Middle East achieve their objectives. This is the fundamental challenge of the 21st century.

You know, it's an interesting debate we're having in America about how we ought to handle Iraq. There's a lot of people -- good, decent people -- saying withdrawal now. They're absolutely wrong. It would be a huge mistake for this country. If you think problems are tough now, imagine what it would be like if the United States leaves before this government has a chance to defend herself, govern herself and listen to the -- and answer to the will of the people....

Helen?

Q: (Chuckles.)

BUSH: What's so funny about me saying "Helen"? (Laughter.)

Q: Israel --

BUSH: It's the anticipation of your question, I guess.

Q: Israel broke its word twice on the truce. And you mentioned Hezbollah rockets, but it's Israeli bombs that destroyed Lebanon. Why do you always give them a pass? And what's your view on view on breaking of your oath for a truce?

BUSH: Hm. Yeah. Thank you.

I -- I'd like to remind people about how this started, how this whole -- how the damage to innocent life, which -- which -- which bothers me, began; what caused this.

Q: Why drop bombs on -- (off mike)?

BUSH: Wait, let me finish. Let -- let -- may I -- let me -- may I -- please, let me finish the question. It was a great question to begin with. The follow-up was a little difficult, but anyway....I know you're waiting for my answer, aren't you, with bated breath.

(Laughs.) There you go.

It's -- this never would have occurred had a terrorist organization, a state within a state, not launched attacks on a sovereign nation. From the beginning, Helen, I said that Israel, one, has a right to defend herself, but Israel ought to be cautious about how she defends herself. Israel is a democratically elected government. They make decisions on their own sovereignty. It's their decision making that is what leads to the attacks they chose. And -- but the world must understand that now is the time to come together to address the root cause of the problem, and the problem is you had a state within a state. You had people launch attacks on a sovereign nation without the consent of the government in the country in which they are lodged.

And that's why it's very important for all of us, those of us who are involved in this process, to get an international force into Lebanon to help the Lebanese government achieve some objectives. One is their ability to exert control over the entire country. Secondly is to make sure that the Hezbollah forces don't rearm, don't get armed from Syria, or Iran through Syria, to be able to continue to wreak havoc in the region.

Let's see. We'll finish the first line here. Everybody can be patient.

Q: Thank you.

BUSH: It's kind of like dancing together, isn't it? (Laughter.)

Q: Yeah, kind of.

BUSH: If I ask for any comments from the peanut gallery, I'll call on you. (Laughter.)

Q: Mr. --

BUSH: Yeah. By the way, seersucker is coming back. I hope everybody gets it. (Laughter.) Never mind.

Q: It's the summertime east Texas county commissioner look. (Laughter.)

BUSH: (Laughs.) Yes. Yes, Martha. Sorry.

Q: That's quite all right. Mr. President, I'd like to go back to Iraq. You have continually cited the elections, the new government as progress in Iraq, and yet the violence has gotten worse in certain areas. You have to go to Baghdad again. Is it not time for a new strategy? And if not, why not?

BUSH: You know, Martha, you've covered the Pentagon; you know that the Pentagon is constantly adjusting tactics because they have the flexibility from the White House to do so.

Q: I'm talking about the strategy.

BUSH: Well, the strategy is to help the Iraqi people achieve their objectives and their dreams, which is a democratic society. That's the strategy.

The tactics -- now, either you say, yes, it's important that we stay there and get it done, or we leave. We're not leaving so long as I'm the president. That would be a huge mistake. It would send an unbelievably, you know, terrible signal to reformers across the region. It would say we've abandoned our desire to change the conditions that create terror. It would give the terrorists a safe haven from which to launch attacks. It would embolden Iran. It would embolden extremists. No, we're not leaving. ...

Now, if you say, are you going to change your strategic objective, it means you're leaving before the mission is complete, and we're not going to leave before the mission is complete. I -- I agree with General Abizaid: We leave before the mission is done, the terrorists will follow us here.

And so we have changed tactics. Our commanders have got the flexibility necessary to change tactics on the ground, starting with plan Baghdad, and that's when we move troops from Mosul into Baghdad and replace them with a Stryker Brigade so we're not -- we increase troops during this time of instability.

Q: Sir, that's not really the question. The strategy is --

BUSH: Sounded like the question to me.

Q: You -- you keep -- you keep saying that you don't want to leave, but is your strategy to win working, even if you don't want to leave? You've gone into Baghdad before. These things have happened before.

BUSH: If I didn't think it would work, I would change the -- our commanders would recommend changing the strategy.

They believe it'll work. It takes time to defeat these people. The Maliki government's been in power for, you know, less than six months. And, yeah, the people spoke. I've cited that as a part of -- of -- the reason I've cited it is because it's what the Iraqi people want. And the fundamental question facing this government is whether or not we will stand with reformers across the region. It's really -- it's really the task. And we're going to stand with this government.

And, you know, obviously I wish the violence would go down, but not as much as the Iraqi citizens would wish the violence would go down. But incredibly enough, they showed great courage, and they want our help. And any sign that says we're going to leave before the job is done simply emboldens terrorists and creates a certain amount of doubt for people so they won't take the risk necessary to help a civil society evolve in the country.

And this is the campaign -- I'm sure they're watching the campaign carefully. There are a lot of good, decent people saying, get out now. Vote for me. I will do everything I can to, I guess, cut off money is what they're trying to do to get our troops out. It's a big mistake. It were to be wrong, in my judgment, for us to leave before the mission is complete in Iraq....

Q: Good morning, Mr. President. When you talked today about the violence in Baghdad, first you mentioned extremists, radicals and then al Qaeda. It seems that al Qaeda and foreign fighters are much less of a problem there and that it really is Iraqis versus Iraqis. And when we heard about your meeting the other day with experts and so forth, some of the reporting out of that said you were frustrated, you were surprised, and your spokesman said, "Nope, you're determined."

But frustration seems like a very real emotion. Why wouldn't you be frustrated, sir, by what's happening?

BUSH: I'm not -- I do remember the meeting; I don't remember being "surprised." I'm not sure what they meant by that.

Q: About the lack of gratitude among the Iraqi people.

BUSH: Oh. No, I think -- yeah -- first of all, to the first part of your question, you know, if you look back at the words of Zarqawi before he was brought to justice, he made it clear that the intent of their tactics in Iraq was to create civil strife. In other words, if you -- look at what he said. He said let's kill Shi'a to get Shi'a to seek revenge and therefore to create this kind of hopefully cycle of violence. Secondly, I think it's pretty clear that the -- at least the evidence indicates that the bombing of the shrine was an al Qaeda plot, all intending to create sectarian violence.

Now, al Qaeda is still very active in Iraq. As a matter of fact, some of the more -- I would guess, I would surmise that some of the more spectacular bombings are done by al Qaeda suiciders. No question there's sectarian violence as well. And the challenge is to provide a security plan such that a political process can go forward. And you know, I know -- I'm sure you all are tired of hearing me say 12 million Iraqis voted, but it's an indication about the desire for people to live in a free society. That's what that means, see. And the only way to defeat this ideology in the long term is to defeat it through another ideology, a competing ideology, one that -- where government, you know, responds to the will of the people. And that's really the fundamental question we face here in the beginning of this 21st century is whether or not we believe as a nation and others believe it is possible to defeat this ideology.

Now, I recognize some say that these folks are not ideologically -- but I strongly disagree. I think not only do they have an ideology, they have tactics necessary to spread their ideology. And it would be a huge mistake for the United States to leave the region, to concede territory to the terrorists, to not confront them.

And -- and the best way to confront them is to help those who want to leave in free society. Look, eventually Iraq will succeed because the Iraqis will see to it that they succeed. And our job is to help them succeed. That's our job. Our job is to help their forces be better equipped, to help their police be able to deal with these extremists, and to help their government succeed.

Q: But are you frustrated, sir?

BUSH: Frustrated? Sometimes I'm frustrated, rarely surprised. Sometimes I'm happy. You know, this is -- this is a -- it's -- but war's not a time of joy. These aren't joyous times. These are challenging times. And they're difficult times. And they're straining the -- the psyche of our country. I understand that. You know, nobody likes to see innocent people die. Nobody wants to turn on their TV on a daily basis and see the havoc wrought by terrorists. And our question is, do we have the -- the capacity and the desire to spread peace by confronting these terrorists and supporting those who want to live in liberty? That's -- that's -- that's the question.

And my answer to that question is, we must. We owe it to future generations to do so....

Q: Thank you, Mr. President. You mentioned the campaign earlier Do you agree with those in your party, including the vice president, who said or implied Democratic voters emboldened al Qaeda types by choosing Ned Lamont over Joe Lieberman, and the message that how Americans vote will send messages to terrorists abroad.

BUSH: What all of us in this administration have been saying is that leaving Iraq before the mission is complete will send the wrong message to the enemy and will create a more dangerous world. That's what we're saying. And it's an honest debate and it's an important debate for Americans to listen to and to be engaged in.

In our judgment, the consequences for defeat in Iraq are unacceptable. I fully understand that some didn't think we ought to go in there in the first place. But defeat -- if you think it's bad now, imagine what Iraq would look like if the United States leaves before this government can defend itself and sustain itself, A -- you know, chaos in Iraq would be very unsettling in the region.

Leaving before the job would be done would send a message that America really is no longer engaged or cares about the form of governments in the Middle East. Leaving before the job would done would be -- send a signal to our troops that the sacrifices they made were not worth it. Leaving before the job was done would be a disaster. And that's what we're saying. I will never question the patriotism of somebody who disagrees with me. This has nothing to do with patriotism; it has everything to do with understanding the world in which we live.

It's like the other day I was critical of those who heralded the federal judge's opinion about the terrorist surveillance program. I thought it was a terrible opinion, and that's why we're appealing it. And I have no -- you know, look, I understand how democracy works. Quite a little bit of criticism in it, which is fine. That's fine. It's part of the process. But I have every right, as do my administration, to make it clear what the consequences would be of policy, and if we think somebody is wrong or doesn't see the world the way it is, we will continue to point that out to people. And therefore, those who heralded the decision not to give law enforcement the tools necessary to protect the American people simply don't see the world the way we do. They say it maybe kind of isolated incidents. These aren't isolated instances; they're tied together. There is a global war going on.

And you know, somebody said, well, this is law enforcement. No, this isn't law enforcement in my judgment. Law enforcement means kind of a simple, you know, singular response to the problem. This is a global war on terror. We're facing, you know, extremists that believe something and they want to achieve objectives. And therefore, the United States must use all our assets, and we must work with others to defeat this enemy.

That's -- that's the call. And we -- in the short run, we got to stop them from attacking us. That's why I give the Tony Blair government great credit and their intelligence officers, and our own government credit for working with the Brits to stop this attack.

But you know something? It's an amazing town, and -- you know, where they say on the one hand, you can't have the tools necessary -- we herald the fact that you won't have the tools necessary to defend the people, and sure enough, a(n) attack would occur and say, how come you don't have the tools necessary to defend the people? That's the way -- that's the way we think around this town. And so, you know, we'll -- Jim, we'll continue to speak out in a respectful way, never challenging somebody's love for America when you criticize their -- their strategies or their -- their point of view.

And, you know, for those who say that, well, all they're trying to say is we're not patriotic simply don't listen to our words very carefully, do they? What -- what matters is that in this campaign that we clarify the different points of view, and there are a lot of people in the Democrat party who believe that the best of course of action is to leave Iraq before the job is done, period, and they're wrong. And the American people have got to understand the consequence of leaving Iraq before the job is done. We're not going to leave Iraq before the job is done, and we'll complete the mission in Iraq. I can't tell you exactly when it's going to be done. But I do know that it's important for us to support the Iraqi people, who have shown incredible courage in their desire to live in a free society. And if we ever give up the desire to help people who live in freedom, we will have lost our soul as a nation as far as I'm concerned.

Q: And would you campaign against Senator Joe Lieberman, whose Republican candidate may support you, but he supports you, too, on Iraq?

BUSH: I'm going to say out of Connecticut. (Laughter.)

Q: It's your native state, Mr. President! You were born there!

BUSH: Shhh! (Laughter.)

Q: How can you stay --

BUSH: (Chuckles.) I may be the only person -- the only presidential candidate who never carried the state in which he was born.

Do you think that's right, Herman? Of course, you would have researched that and dropped it out for everybody to see, particularly since I dissed that just ridiculous-looking outfit. (Laughter.)

Q: Your mother raised you better than that, Mr. President....

BUSH: And by the way, we're -- I'm staying out of Connecticut because the -- the -- you know, that's what the party suggested, the Republican Party of Connecticut, and plus there's a better place to spend our money, time and resources.

Q: Mr. President, polls continue to show sagging support for the war in Iraq. I'm curious as to how you see this developing. Is it your belief that long-term results will vindicate your strategy, and people will change their mind about it? Or is the kind of thing you're doing because you think it's right and you don't care if you ever gain public support for it?

BUSH: Thank you. Yeah, look -- look, I mean, presidents care about whether people support their policies. I don't -- (inaudible) -- think that I don't care. Of course I care. But I understand why people are discouraged about Iraq. I can understand that. There is -- we live in, you know, a world in which people hope things happen quickly. And this is a situation where things don't happen quickly because there's, you know, a very tough group of people using tactics, mainly the killing of innocent people, to achieve their objective, and they're skillful about how they do this and they also know the impact of what it means on the "conscienceness" of those of us who live in the free world. They know that. And so I care. I really do. I wish -- you know, and so therefore I must spend a lot of time trying to explain as best I can, you know, why it's important for us to succeed in Iraq. And --

Q: A quick follow-up. A lot of the consequences you mention for pulling out seem like maybe they never would have been there if we hadn't gone in. How do you square all of that?

BUSH: I square it because imagine a world in which you had a Saddam Hussein who had the capacity to make a weapon of mass destruction, who was paying suiciders to kill innocent life, who would -- who had relations with Zarqawi. Imagine what the world would be like with him in power. The idea is to try to help change the Middle East.

Now, look, I -- part of the reason we went into Iraq was -- the main reason we went into Iraq at the time was we thought he had weapons of mass destruction. It turns out he didn't, but he had the capacity to make weapons of mass destruction.

But I also talked about the human suffering in Iraq, and I also talked the need to advance a freedom agenda. And so my question -- my answer to your question is, is that imagine a world in which Saddam Hussein was there, stirring up even more trouble in a part of a world that had so much resentment and so much hatred that people came and killed 3,000 of our citizens.

You know, I've heard this theory about, you know, everything was just fine until we arrived and, you know, kind of -- the "stir up the hornet's nest" theory. It just doesn't hold water as far as I'm concerned. The terrorists attacked us and killed 3,000 of our citizens before we started the freedom agenda in the Middle East. They were --

Q: What did Iraq have to do with that?

BUSH: What did Iraq have to do with what?

Q: The attack on the World Trade Center.

BUSH: Nothing, except for it's part of -- and nobody's ever suggested in this administration that Saddam Hussein ordered the attack. Iraq was a -- Iraq -- the lesson of September the 11th is take threats before they fully materialize, Ken.

Nobody's ever suggested that the attacks of September the 11th were ordered by Iraq. I have suggested, however, that resentment and the lack of hope create the breeding grounds for terrorists who are willing to use suiciders to kill to achieve an objective. I have made that case. And one way to defeat that -- you know, defeat resentment, is with hope. And the best way to do hope is through a form of government.

Now, I said going into Iraq we got to take these threats seriously before they fully materialized. I saw a threat. I fully believe it was the right decision to remove Saddam Hussein, and I fully believe the world was better off without him. Now, the question is, how do we succeed in Iraq? And you don't succeed by leaving before the mission is complete, like some in this political process are suggesting.

source: http://editorandpublisher.com/eandp/news/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1003020104

Sad Face: Many Americans Harbor Strong Bias Against U.S. Muslims

2006-08-22T11:35:00.000-04:00

Gallup: Many Americans Harbor Strong Bias Against U.S. Muslims

By E&P Staff

Published: August 10, 2006 10:40 AM ET
NEW YORK A new Gallup poll finds that many Americans -- what it calls "substantial minorities" -- harbor "negative feelings or prejudices against people of the Muslim faith" in this country. Nearly one in four Americans, 22%, say they would not like to have a Muslim as a neighbor.

While Americans tend to disagree with the notion that Muslims living in the United States are sympathetic to al-Qaeda, a significant 34% believe they do back al-Qaeda. And fewer than half -- 49% -- believe U.S. Muslims are loyal to the United States.

Almost four in ten, 39%, advocate that Muslims here should carry special I.D. That same number admit that they do hold some "prejudice" against Muslims. Forty-four percent say their religious views are too "extreme."

In every case, Americans who actually know any Muslims are more sympathethic.

The poll was taken at the end of July and surveyed 1,007 adult Americans.

source: http://www.editorandpublisher.com/eandp/news/article_display.jsp?vnu_content_id=1002984956

"The US and Israel Stand Alone"

2006-08-15T19:42:00.000-04:00

SPIEGEL ONLINE - August 15, 2006, 12:51 PM
URL: http://service.spiegel.de/cache/international/spiegel/0,1518,431793,00.html
SPIEGEL Interview with Jimmy Carter

"The US and Israel Stand Alone"

Former US president Jimmy Carter speaks with DER SPIEGEL about the danger posed to American values by George W. Bush, the difficult situation in the Middle East and Cuba's ailing Fidel Castro.

AP
Former US president Jimmy Carter: "I don't think that Israel has any legal or moral justification for their massive bombing of the entire nation of Lebanon."
SPIEGEL: Mr. Carter, in your new book you write that only the American people can ensure that the US government returns to the country's old moral principles. Are you suggesting that the current US administration of George W. Bush of acting immorally?
Carter: There's no doubt that this administration has made a radical and unpressured departure from the basic policies of all previous administrations including those of both Republican and Democratic presidents.
SPIEGEL: For example?
Carter: Under all of its predecessors there was a commitment to peace instead of preemptive war. Our country always had a policy of not going to war unless our own security was directly threatened and now we have a new policy of going to war on a preemptive basis. Another very serious departure from past policies is the separation of church and state, which I describe in the book. This has been a policy since the time of Thomas Jefferson and my own religious beliefs are compatible with this. The other principle that I described in the book is basic justice. We've never had an administration before that so overtly and clearly and consistently passed tax reform bills that were uniquely targeted to benefit the richest people in our country at the expense or the detriment of the working families of America.
SPIEGEL: You also mentioned the hatred for the United States throughout the Arab world which has ensued as a result of the invasion of Iraq. Given this circumstance, does it come as any surprise that Washington's call for democracy in the Middle East has been discredited?
Carter: No, as a matter of fact, the concerns I exposed have gotten even worse now with the United States supporting and encouraging Israel in its unjustified attack on Lebanon.
SPIEGEL: But wasn't Israel the first to get attacked?
Carter: I don't think that Israel has any legal or moral justification for their massive bombing of the entire nation of Lebanon. What happened is that Israel is holding almost 10,000 prisoners, so when the militants in Lebanon or in Gaza take one or two soldiers, Israel looks upon this as a justification for an attack on the civilian population of Lebanon and Gaza. I do not think that's justified, no.
SPIEGEL: Do you think the United States is still an important factor in securing a peaceful solution to the Middle East crisis?
Carter: Yes, as a matter of fact as you know ever since Israel has been a nation the United States has provided the leadership. Every president down to the ages has done this in a fairly balanced way, including George Bush senior, Gerald Ford, and others including myself and Bill Clinton. This administration has not attempted at all in the last six years to negotiate or attempt to negotiate a settlement between Israel and any of its neighbors or the Palestinians.

SPIEGEL: What makes you personally so optimistic about the effectiveness of diplomacy? You are, so to speak, the father of Camp David negotiations.
Carter: When I became president we had had four terrible wars between the Arabs and Israelis (behind us). And I under great difficulty, particularly because Menachim Begin was elected, decided to try negotiation and it worked and we have a peace treaty between Israel and Egypt for 27 years that has never been violated. You never can be certain in advance that negotiations on difficult circumstances will be successful, but you can be certain in advance if you don't negotiate that your problem is going to continue and maybe even get worse.
SPIEGEL: But negotiations failed to prevent the burning of Beirut and bombardment of Haifa.
Carter: I'm distressed. But I think that the proposals that have been made in the last few days by the (Lebanese) Prime Minister (Fuoad) Siniora are quite reasonable. And I think they should declare an immediate cease-fire on both sides, Hezbollah said they would comply, I hope Israel will comply, and then do the long, slow, tedious negotiation that is necessary to stabilize the northern border of Israel completely. There has to be some exchange of prisoners. There have been successful exchanges of prisoners between Israel and the Palestinians in the past and that's something that can be done right now.
SPIEGEL: Should there be an international peacekeeping force along the Lebanese-Israeli border?
Carter: Yes.
SPIEGEL: And can you imagine Germans soldiers taking part?
Carter: Yes, I can imagine Germans taking part.
SPIEGEL: ... even with their history?
Carter: Yes. That would be certainly satisfactory to me personally, and I think most people believe that enough time has passed so that historical facts can be ignored.
SPIEGEL: One main points of your book is the rather strange coalition between Christian fundamentalists and the Republican Party. How can such a coalition of the pious lead to moral catastrophes like the Iraqi prison scandal in Abu Ghraib and torture in Guantanamo?
Carter: The fundamentalists believe they have a unique relationship with God, and that they and their ideas are God's ideas and God's premises on the particular issue. Therefore, by definition since they are speaking for God anyone who disagrees with them is inherently wrong. And the next step is: Those who disagree with them are inherently inferior, and in extreme cases -- as is the case with some fundamentalists around the world -- it makes your opponents sub-humans, so that their lives are not significant. Another thing is that a fundamentalist can't bring himself or herself to negotiate with people who disagree with them because the negotiating process itself is an indication of implied equality. And so this administration, for instance, has a policy of just refusing to talk to someone who is in strong disagreement with them -- which is also a radical departure from past history. So these are the kinds of things that cause me concern. And, of course, fundamentalists don't believe they can make mistakes, so when we permit the torture of prisoners in Guantanamo or Abu Ghraib, it's just impossible for a fundamentalist to admit that a mistake was made.
SPIEGEL: So how does this proximity to Christian fundamentalism manifest itself politically?

Carter: Unfortunately, after Sept., there was an outburst in America of intense suffering and patriotism, and the Bush administration was very shrewd and effective in painting anyone who disagreed with the policies as unpatriotic or even traitorous. For three years, I'd say, the major news media in our country were complicit in this subservience to the Bush administration out of fear that they would be accused of being disloyal. I think in the last six months or so some of the media have now begun to be critical. But it's a long time coming.
SPIEGEL: Take your fellow Democrat Senator Hillary Clinton. These days she is demanding the resignation of Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld. But she, like many others, allowed President Bush to invade Iraq under a false pretext.
Carter: That's correct.
SPIEGEL: Was the whole country in danger of losing its core values?
Carter: For a while, yes. As you possibly know, historically, our country has had the capability of self-correcting our own mistakes. This applied to slavery in 1865, it applied to legal racial segregation a hundred years later or so. It applied to the Joe McCarthy era when anti-communism was in a fearsome phase in the country like terrorism now. So we have an ability to correct ourselves and I believe that nowadays there is a self-correction taking place. In my opinion the election results in Connecticut (Eds: The primary loss of war supporter Senator Joseph Lieberman) were an indication that Americans realized very clearly that we made a mistake in going into Iraq and staying there too long.
SPIEGEL: Now even President Bush appears to have learned something from the catastrophe in Iraq. During his second term he has taken a more multilateral approach and has seemed to return to international cooperation.
Carter: I think the administration learned a lesson, but I don't see any indication that the administration would ever admit that it did make a mistake and needed to learn a lesson. I haven't seen much indication, by the way, of your premise that this administration is now reconciling itself to other countries. I think that at this moment the United States and Israel probably stand more alone than our country has in generations.
SPIEGEL: You've written about your meeting with Fidel Castro. He appears seriously ill now and Cuban exiles are partying already in the streets of Miami. You are probably not in the mood to join them.
Carter: No, that's true. Just because someone is ill I don't think there should be a celebration of potential death. And my own belief is that Fidel Castro will recover. He is two years younger than I am, so he's not beyond hope.
SPIEGEL: You sought to normalize relations with Castro, but that never happened. Has anything been achieved through Cuba's isolation?
Carter: In my opinion, the embargo strengthens Castro and perpetuates communism in Cuba. A maximum degree of trade, tourism, commerce, visitation between our country and Cuba would bring an earlier end to Castro's regime.
SPIEGEL: You've been called the moral conscience of your country. How do you look at it yourself? Are you an outsider in American politics these days or do you represent a political demographic that could maybe elect the next US president?
Carter: I think I represent the vast majority of Democrats in this country. I think there is a substantial portion of American people that completely agree with me. I can't say a majority because we have fragmented portions in our country and divisions concerning gun control and the death penalty and abortion and gay marriage.
SPIEGEL: As president, your performance was often criticized. But the work you did after leaving office to promote human rights has been widely praised. Has life been unfair to you?
Carter: I've been lucky in my life. Everything that I've done has brought great pleasure and gratification to me and my wife. I had four years in the White House -- it was not a failure. For someone to serve as president of the United States you can't say it is a political failure. And we have had the best years of our lives since we left the White House. We've had a very full life.
SPIEGEL: Do you feel you achieved even more out of office than you did as president?
Carter: Well, I've used the prestige and influence of having been a president of the United States as effectively as possible. And secondly, I've still been able to carry out my commitments to peace and human rights and environmental quality and freedom and democracy and so forth.
SPIEGEL: Does America need a regime change?
Carter: As I've said before, there is a self-corrective aspect to our country. And I think that the first step is going to be in the November election this year. This year, the Democrats have good chance of capturing one of the houses of Congress. I think the Senate is going to be a very close decision. My oldest son is running for the US Senate in the state of Nevada. And if just he and a few others can be successful then you have the US Senate in Democratic hands and that will make a profound and immediate difference.
SPIEGEL: Mr. Carter, thank you for the interview.

Reflection of an American Muslim

2006-08-15T02:22:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

Its been a while, i know. The reason is somewhat complicated, and a little jumbled up in my head. Recent events around the world have just caused me to be completely disgusted at the hypocrisy of our so called leaders, and have left me dejected and hopeless for the political future of the world.

Nonetheless, Allah subhana wa ta ala has continued to place blessings in my own personal life, which has left me even more confused. At times I am so happy I can't stop smiling (alhamdulilah), and then i turn on the tv, or open up my e-mail box to read about the craziness around the world. I have not yet found a way to balance the two in my life, nor do i know how.

Once again it brings me to think about my personal state in the eyes of the Lord of everything. The fact that most Muslims around the world are being subjected to some type of hardship, and yet I am able to sit in the comfort of my own home, my only discomfort being the heat, which really isn't even that bad. It makes me think about how Allah subhana wa ta ala views me. It brings me to think about my experience teaching. As a teacher though the overarching lesson is the same for everyone in the class, when I found myself walking around and talking to the students one on one, i constantly had to change what i was saying to suit each individual child. Some of the students I would challenge with questions that I would pose to my own peers, because i felt that they were at a certain level that they could relate to the question and be able to contemplate, reflect on, and eventually answer. Whereas, there were other students that I would pose simple questions, or as Bloom's Taxonomy would label, "recall" questions, that required no real thought, but simply asked the students to spit back an answer at me. The reason being, i knew that the students in my class were all at different levels, while some could handle intense questions that required analyzation and research, others simply could not. As a result the way I dealt with all of them changed person to person.

So that brings me back to the situation at hand. Why is it that as an American Muslim that I'm getting this 'easy' treatment, when my brothers and sisters in Lebanon, Palestine, Sudan, Kashmir, Chechnya, Pakistan, etc. etc. etc. are being tested in so many various ways. Am I, in the eyes of my Lord, a Muslim who just can't handle the deeper tests? Its not that I am complaining about the lack of trials and tribulations in my life, because ALHAMDULILAH i am not. I recognize and am grateful for all of the different blessings in my life, yet at times when i sit and read about the situation of these people, i don't know what to think...

May Allah subhana wa ta ala shower his mercy upon us all...
May He grant steadfastness to those that are in hardship,
and May He subhana wa ta ala make us amongst the Righteous and victorious..
ameen.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

Hate Groups Infilitrating the Military

2006-07-07T17:32:00.000-04:00

http://www.nytimes.com/2006/07/07/washington/07recruit.html?ex=1152417600&en=bab2dcc84f76e472&ei=5087%0A

Hate Groups Are Infiltrating the Military, Group Asserts

By JOHN KIFNER
Published: July 7, 2006

A decade after the Pentagon declared a zero-tolerance policy for racist hate groups, recruiting shortfalls caused by the war in Iraq have allowed "large numbers of neo-Nazis and skinhead extremists" to infiltrate the military, according to a watchdog organization.

The Southern Poverty Law Center, which tracks racist and right-wing militia groups, estimated that the numbers could run into the thousands, citing interviews with Defense Department investigators and reports and postings on racist Web sites and magazines.

"We've got Aryan Nations graffiti in Baghdad," the group quoted a Defense Department investigator as saying in a report to be posted today on its Web site, www.splcenter.org. "That's a problem."

A Defense Department spokeswoman said officials there could not comment on the report because they had not yet seen it.

The center called on Defense Secretary Donald H. Rumsfeld to appoint a task force to study the problem, declare a new zero tolerance policy and strictly enforce it.

The report said that neo-Nazi groups like the National Alliance, whose founder, William Pierce, wrote "The Turner Diaries," the novel that was the inspiration and blueprint for Timothy J. McVeigh's bombing of the Oklahoma City federal building, sought to enroll followers in the Army to get training for a race war.

The groups are being abetted, the report said, by pressure on recruiters, particularly for the Army, to meet quotas that are more difficult to reach because of the growing unpopularity of the war in Iraq.

The report quotes Scott Barfield, a Defense Department investigator, saying, "Recruiters are knowingly allowing neo-Nazis and white supremacists to join the armed forces, and commanders don't remove them from the military even after we positively identify them as extremists or gang members."

Mr. Barfield said Army recruiters struggled last year to meet goals. "They don't want to make a big deal again about neo-Nazis in the military," he said, "because then parents who are already worried about their kids signing up and dying in Iraq are going to be even more reluctant about their kids enlisting if they feel they'll be exposed to gangs and white supremacists."

The 1996 crackdown on extremists came after revelations that Mr. McVeigh had espoused far-right ideas when he was in the Army and recruited two fellow soldiers to aid his bomb plot. Those revelations were followed by a furor that developed when three white paratroopers were convicted of the random slaying of a black couple in order to win tattoos and 19 others were discharged for participating in neo-Nazi activities.

The defense secretary at the time, William Perry, said the rules were meant to leave no room for racist and extremist activities within the military. But the report said Mr. Barfield, who is based at Fort Lewis, Wash., had said that he had provided evidence on 320 extremists there in the past year, but that only two had been discharged. He also said there was an online network of neo-Nazis.

"They're communicating with each other about weapons, about recruiting, about keeping their identities secret, about organizing within the military," he said. "Several of these individuals have since been deployed to combat missions in Iraq."

The report cited accounts by neo-Nazis of their infiltration of the military, including a discussion on the white supremacist Web site Stormfront. "There are others among you in the forces," one participant wrote. "You are never alone."

An article in the National Alliance magazine Resistance urged skinheads to join the Army and insist on being assigned to light infantry units.

The Southern Poverty Law Center identified the author as Steven Barry, who it said was a former Special Forces officer who was the alliance's "military unit coordinator."

"Light infantry is your branch of choice because the coming race war and the ethnic cleansing to follow will be very much an infantryman's war," he wrote. "It will be house-to-house, neighborhood-by-neighborhood until your town or city is cleared and the alien races are driven into the countryside where they can be hunted down and 'cleansed.' "

He concluded: "As a professional soldier, my goal is to fill the ranks of the United States Army with skinheads. As street brawlers, you will be useless in the coming race war. As trained infantrymen, you will join the ranks of the Aryan warrior brotherhood."

another car accident

2006-07-04T02:24:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

one of my cousins got into a car accident today in dubai...its pretty serious hes in the ICU, and his wife and kids are here in the states visiting us for his brothers upcoming shaadi. They'll be flying out tomorrow inshaAllah.

SubhanAllah once again it goes to show how everything can change in a simple moment. Just yesterday my cousin called about the upcoming wedding informing us that she was mailing out invitations...and then a day later there is news that the wedding may be postponed...

Make dua that he has a speeeeedy recovery and that everything's a-okay :)

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah..

Did anyone see this?

2006-06-27T02:25:00.000-04:00

http://www.roadtoguantanamomovie.com/

If so...any comments?

tests

2006-06-27T01:54:00.001-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Today some friends and I got together to prepare a little something for one of our friends that is getting married...In the process we took a break, which we are always good at alhamdulilah :), and ate and sat around and ended up talking more than working (go figure). We sat around and discussed normal girl things, the topic started on in-laws, went to cousin marriages, then made its way to weird marriages, compared to good marriages, talks about getting married too young, or too old, and then suddenly ended at child abuse/molestation/rape.

scary.

Somehow at my time at the Islamic Center many individuals approached me, both sisters and brothers (???) and told me about personal abuse stories, and i sat there absolutely shocked...

I didn't know why these people reached out to me, and frankly i had nooooooooooooooo idea what to say (especially to the brothers), most of the time I would refer them on to someone else...because i honestly would not even know where to begin. Twenty years later they seemed to be reliving the same pain, day after day after day. I would just look down at my hands, and think about how much these individuals went through, and still are going through. Tests come to us all in different shapes and forms, and some individuals subhanAllah are like the strongest people on earth because of the pain and hardships they've endured...often times not just once but numerous times...and then i begin to examine my own life. SubhanAllah why is that you are only grateful when you hear about calamities that fall on other individuals. I sit there and thank Allah for every blessing that has been bestowed on me, and protection from all the hardships that He subhana wa ta ala has saved me from, and somehow, once again, I wonder, what exactly made that individual go through these tests while i sit around and worry about....subhanAllah i can hardly think of a worry that I have today.

Often times i sit here and think that perhaps i am taking the easy way out in life...not that these individuals chose a path that allowed them to have hardships, but perhaps im doing something that is allowing me to live in the safety of my bubble. Or perhaps im doing nothing at all, which is the core of the problem.

Of course we shouldn't pray or hope for hardships, but perhaps we should take a closer look at our lives when everything seems at a standstill.

Allah subhana wa ta ala tests those that He loves and only tests them in their own capacity...
so are we amongst the loved ones?

(i pray that we are...)

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

summer!!!

2006-06-21T03:11:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Too much time has passed since i last made a list...

thus i shall continue in this tradition.

This list is simply called "SUMMER":

1. Though we bought an AC for the apt we have not yet installed it...so we are boiling....even i am amazed at our laziness..
2. Muggy baby is super affectionate in the summer.
3. I eat less in the summer.
4. I have no friends in the summer.
5. I have the most amazing roommates ever mashaAllah :) (may Allah subhana wa ta ala bless and preserve them)
6. This wedding every weekend thing is getting kind of absurd...i havent seen my parents in forever :(
7. I looooooooooooove my masters program :) :) :)
8. Let's go Softballers :)
9. Black jilbabs are suprisingly still my number one attire of choice in the summer.
10. I haven't eaten as much icecream as i should be.
11. Jamba Juice !
12. Daily trips to Whole Food
13. Soy everything
14. Thursday afternoon dhikr sessions !
15. Maanu Jaanu, Ishy bishy bumbo, safah rani, minu tinu, hiyu piyu :)
16. ***** SECRET ******** :) (i know madddd shady)..but im trying to build suspense :)
17. not enough time in the park :(
18. late night discussions
19. possibly my last summer in NYC
20. more one on one time with the One and Only

my brain is kind of fried because i spend five hours straight in class, and i would reflect on the awesome things we do, however our prof makes us write reflections like 3 times each class, so im kinda reflectioned out..
however today we talked about the use of ebonics in the classroom...is it appropriate? is ebonics another language or a dialect? how do you encourage your kids to speak in 'standard' english?

interesting times :)

SubhanAllah to think that a year (and two months) from now I will potentially (inshaAllah) have my own class is kinda cool :)
I would looooooove to teach in an inner-city high school but i highly doubt my parents will be down with that idea..
so i may just have to hit up suburbia post graduation....

i just pray im in a place that i can benefit and that can benefit me ...
i've had the whole islamic school vs public school debate with myself (and others) and in the end i think i've decided that i want to teach in a public school...from my experience in teaching workshops in highschools i've realized that a lot of students have soooo many questions about islam, and they are so eager to have these issues addressed, and dont necessarily have the means to do so, that it would be very beneficial to have muslims in the public school system...

that ofcourse is my own personal view..
if anyone has their own please feel free to share..

until then..
take care..
make dua..
be happy...
wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Google..

2006-06-21T02:51:00.000-04:00

assalamualiakum wa rahmatullah.

have you ever googled yourself?

well i just did ...and i came up with some sad sad things..MAD hate.
Most of the hate comes from the protest/teach-in we had at NYU
about the cartooons...

anyway sad times..

thus i suggest you all put fun nice things about me on the internet so i am no longer sad...lol jk :)

May Allah subhana wa ta ala protect and guide us.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

:)

cloud nine :)

2006-06-16T03:16:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

Today i went to a dhikr session at the Islamic Center with Shaykh Ahmed (we meet Thursday's after Asr- 6:15ish) and subhanAllah it was like that spiritual jump i needed. His bayaan was soooooooo on point mashaAllalh, he talked about Nisbah (spiritual attachment/significance/affinity) and if i tried to describe it i would do no justice to it. I liked one analogy he used when talking about muraqabah though...he said muraqabah is like spiritual medicine, whereas reading Quran, salawat, and istighfar are like vitamins, so don't just take vitamins and forget about the medicine in itself.

Just when i thought my day couldn't get anyyyyyy better, Shaykh Ahmed asks which sisters are in the room and when he found out i was there he said "Mufti Kamal sends his salaams to you".

:) :) :) :) :) :) :) :) :)

I am on cloud nine :) (alhamdulilah).

May Allah subhana wa ta ala increase our shuyukh :)

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

Check it:

The Indispensability of Abundant Zikr and Muraqabah
for the Seeker - Translation of a talk given by Shaykh Zulfiqar Ahmad (damat barakatuhum)

http://www.tasawwuf.org/basics/muraqabah.htm

The first lesson in the esteemed Naqshbandi Silsilah is Latifa-e-Qalb. Upon this, the seeker traveling the spiritual path (salik) engages in the spiritual exercise of muraqabah, where he or she sets aside some private time to sit and reflect on Allah. In this exercise the salik strives to empty the heart of all thoughts and imagines the blessings and mercy of Allah entering the heart and erasing its darkness. As if in gratitude to being cleansed of darkness the heart joyfully calls out the Name of Allah over and over again… Allah! Allah! Allah!

A general scientific principle states that whenever a vacuum is created, something comes in to fill it and therefore the vacuum does not stay as is. Similarly when we sit and strive to remove all thoughts from our heart the aim is to create a void that will hopefully be filled with thoughts of Allah.

Darkness and light cannot coexist in the same space. Hence the more we strive to rid our hearts of filth, the hope is that divine light, goodness and blessing will enter to replace the darkness that was there. This is why it is extremely important to do muraqabah in abundance. Wherever in the Holy Quran we find the command to practice dhikr, the word is accompanied with the adjective signifying abundance (dhikr-e-kathir).

O you who believe! Celebrate the praises of Allah, and do this often [33:41]

What then is meant by abundant dhikr? At all times a person is either lying down, sitting or on his feet. Abundant dhikr refers to remembering Allah at all times in all these states.

To clarify this, the elders usually present the example of a man who falls ill and is running a high fever. Under this scenario his doctor prescribes antibiotics three times a day for seven days, so that it would take a total of 21 pills to cure the fever. Now, if this person breaks this sequence and has one pill every 3 days, even if he were to have a total of 22 his illness will not be cured.

Why then is the illness not cured even though the person takes more of the medication? Despite the accuracy of the diagnosis and the effectiveness of the medicine, it was not taken in the quantity prescribed by the physician and so the person remains ill. This indicates that quantity counts for a lot in some matters, especially here. Thus even if a patient skips a dose of his medication just one time, the doctor tells him to start the course again from the beginning for the sake of effectiveness.

Consequently, quantity in dhikr is absolutely crucial for a seeker on this path. A little dhikr does the seeker no benefit.

Little do they hold Allah in remembrance [4:142]

The result of this is;

(They are) distracted in mind even in the midst of it, being (sincerely) for neither one group nor for another whom Allah leaves straying, never wilt thou find for him the way [4:143]

A person whose dhikr is insufficient becomes a victim of doubt. He does not tread with confidence the path that leads him to his destination - his feet falter and he constantly changes direction. On the other hand, abundance of dhikr eliminates the darkness of the heart. It is thus that our elders tell us that the filth of thought (fikr) is only removed by the abundance of remembrance (dhikr).

How can a person tell whether a particular thought is inspired by Allah or the Devil (Shaitan)? Remembrance (dhikr) and piety (taqwa) reveal this distinction. The Holy Quran says Allah grants furqan to whoever has taqwa.

He will grant you a criterion (to judge between right and wrong) [8:29]

Furqan is the ability to distinguish between right and wrong, the insight that distinguishes between good and evil. While there may be no apparent basis for making this distinction, this internal light [1] allows a person to differentiate between righteousness and wickedness. This furqan is a blessing that Allah grants to those who engage in plentiful dhikr.

So we must strive to remember Allah lying down, sitting, and whenever we are on our feet. The hearts of the believers should be connected with their Lord in every situation until the very traces of sinfulness are erased from every vein and muscle of their bodies. Constant remembrance leads to spiritual connection (nisbah) to Allah, and cleanses a person completely when it permeates the body. Such a person submits his entire being to Allah and his life and death become only for Allah, and Allah does not let down a person who so completely gives himself up to Him. The Glory of Allah is His alone, and He never abandons the one who submits to Him, but rather protects His servant.

The basic rule for one who seeks to gain all this benefit is to engage in abundant dhikr, and this is one criterion that the majority of seekers fail to meet. They give bay'ah [2] and most of them even change their lifestyle and appearance, but fail to do sufficient dhikr. If they sit for muraqabah at all it only lasts five or ten minutes, and they fail to realize that Allah is not found through mere minutes of muraqabah! Even the world cannot be gained with just a few minutes of effort, so how can we expect to reach the Lord of the worlds by such a meager attempt?

It is commonly understood that if one wishes for a meeting with someone of importance, then he or she will have to wait in line for one's turn just because of the high rank and demand of the individual or party sought after. For example, people line up for hours and sometimes days for an audience with a famous movie or sports star just because of that individual's high status in society. Now if people are required to wait for a meeting with another human being, then surely a meeting with Allahthe Lord of the Worlds mandates a waiting period also. This waiting time is fulfilled through muraqabah.

A person who thus spends his life sitting with his head lowered yearning for a meeting with Allah , fulfills his waiting time on the Day of Judgment. Consequently the one who does not do this in the world will have to spend the necessary wait time in the Hereafter. But the wait time in the Hereafter is indeed grueling! Someone will have to stand in wait for a thousand years - someone for a thousand more.

Abundance in dhikr is so important that Allah ordained it upon His Prophets. Allahcommanded Prophet Musa:

Go, you and your brother, with My Signs, and slacken not either of you in keeping Me in remembrance [ 20:42 ]

Whenever our elders say or command something their words carry potency and weight. How incredibly important must dhikr be in our lives if Allah is issuing the command and on the receiving end are two prophets?

So if we want the love of the world and the darkness of sin to be erased from our hearts, the only way to achieve this is through abundant dhikr. Just like the earth is cleansed when rain falls upon it, hearts are purged when mercy rains down upon them through abundant dhikr.

Hadrat Shah Waliullah Muhaddith Dehlvi (may the mercy of Allah be upon him) has written that there are two ways in which the earth regains purity if there is filth upon it.

1. Water pours down in such abundance that the filth is completely washed away.
2. The sun shines down so intensely that all trace of filth is burned away.

Similarly, there are only two ways to attain purification of the heart. One way is to engage in so much dhikr that mercy rains down upon one's heart to such an extent that it eliminates the filth and cures the diseases of the heart. The other is to remain in the company of a righteous Shaykh and serve him, and like the sun the heart of the Shaykh shines its rays upon his heart. The resulting blessing (faidh) removes all signs of the filth and a person's heart is rendered pure.

Thus, we should be frequent and regular in our dhikr so that Allah grants us annihilation of the heart (fana-e-qalbi), a blessing attained after the heart is purified in which a person is forever occupied in the remembrance of his Lord. However, this does not mean that he always sits in prayer and forsakes all other responsibilities. Rather the opposite is true and he takes care of all his worldly and family responsibilities but with a constant awareness of and a deep connection with Allah.

The love of the world has taken over our hearts and we are constantly thinking about it! Even if we make the firm intention not to think about worldly affairs during prayer or throughout the day we cannot let go of these thoughts. This is called annihilation in the world (fana-fid-duniya). Today we are so absorbed in the world that despite our best efforts we are not able to rid our hearts of preoccupation with it. If only we would gain such a level of annihilation in Allah (fina-fillah) that we wouldn't be able to forget Him even if we tried. Such is the station that we aspire towards, and how pitiful is our present state! It is our prayer that Allah grants us this lofty station, so that our life is spent upon goodness and our feet remain firm on the path that leads us to Him. Ameen.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

[1] A saying of the Prophettells us “Beware of the insight of a believer, for he sees with the light (nur) of Allah”

[2] Students begin their spiritual journey by taking an oath (bay'ah) with a spiritual master (Shaykh). This oath entails seeking forgiveness from Allah for past sins and renewing a lifetime commitment to living according to the Holy Quran and the example (sunnah) of the Prophet. The Messenger took such pledges from many of his companions, and hence the act of bay'ah is classified by traditional scholars as a sunnah.

argh

2006-06-13T00:46:00.000-04:00

assalamualiakum wa rahmatullah......

Sometimes i wonder what has happend to people's hearts...
how can they pray numerous times a day, recite ayah after ayah of Quran
and then still carry around hard hearts...

How can they look at one another and assume who is higher in the sight of God, seriously though did they really rip open the person's chest and take a look deep down in their heart..

it really disgusts me to see so much pride and arrogance in people's actions that they elevate themselves to an untouchable state that everything they do is free of critique, yet everyones actions are put under a microscope..

It make me reflect on the story of Adam alayhi salam. Allah subhana wa ta ala crafted him out of dust and dirt and then brought him to life. It makes me think about how Iblis thought himself better than Adam alayhi salam because Iblis was made of fire and Adam of dust. This arrogance lead Iblis to believe that he was too great to even obey a command of Allah, the most high, the most great. This very arrogance lead Iblis from being one of Allah subhana wa ta ala's most beloved to ...Allah knows what...

Yet here we are, still making the same mistakes...I wonder if we too have made ourselves so so so so far from Allah subhana wa ta ala, thinking ourselves self sufficient..

Allah..
Allah..
Allah..

Theres something unique in the name of Allah that makes your heart at ease...Just say it...slowly... subhanAllah...its out of this world..

On a different note...

I've started my masters and I believe I am in the company of some of the most kind hearted individuals I have ever met in my life. There is only one Muslim besides myself in the program, yet I look at these individuals and i see Islam.

Theres something in the heart and eyes of an educator that is so selfless subhanAllah...for one thing you know they're not in it for the money :) So many people in my program have left the corporate world thats filled with so many aspects of the dunya and came to education. They talk about how they lacked spiritual and mental stimulation from the dunya and started on a journey to find themselves in the service of others, namely the youth.

i apologize for the ranting...
just a little bit of frustration ..

May Allah subhana wa ta ala guide and protect us..
and may He remind us day to day that we are no greater than the soil we walk upon, except that He subhana wa ta ala elevated us and that one day we will return to this very soil...

beace in the middle east..
wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

A Car Ride..

2006-06-04T13:40:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

Last night I was driving home from my sisters place at around 2 AM back to my (parents') house. The car ride is just over an hour long, and this ride home was unique because a) it was so late, b) it was raining, and c) it was my first car ride after my friend's accident.

Let me back track a little...

Earlier this week one of my best friends called me and told me she got into a car accident earlier that morning. My first response was naturally to ask how she was, though I figured it seriously couldn't be that bad since she herself is talking to me on the phone. She told me she was okay, yet I was still a little nervous and wanted to see her so I jumped on the next train to her house. After getting there I realized the severity of the accident. She had been driving to get a dent in her car fixed (ironic) on a major 2 lane highway and was driving at about 70 mph in the left lane. She described the driving conditions and stated that the car in front of her was quite close, leaving virtually no space for another car to merge in. A car on her right signaled to come into the left lane, since there was no space, she assumed the car wouldn't turn, however he did. At this point in time she knew that if she braked she would most definitely hit him, and she couldn't swerve to the right since there were cars there, so she swerved to the left. There was no shoulder, and no barrier between the southbound side and the northbound side, however there was a grassy median in which her car spun out of control in, since she was going so fast one of her tires ripped off and the car spun out of control. At this point she described that she had no idea what she was doing so she continued to hit the accelerator, which caused her car to drive into oncoming traffic on the opposite side of the highway. She had no idea what to do, so she closed her eyes, assuming that she was going to die. She accounts that she started screaming "mummy", at the same time, while her eyes are closed still hitting the accelerator. The car came to a stop when she crashed into a van on the exit ramp. She then got out of the car, and saw dozens of individuals(men) who had stopped their cars and were rushing to her aid. Upon seeing that she was fine, they rushed to the van, where alhamdulilah the other passengers seemed to be doing well as well. The officer later told her that witnesses said that her car was air bound for a while, and that she was very very very lucky that she walked out of that accident with virtually nothing wrong with her minus a couple of bruises from the seat belt and airbag. The car was completely totaled and the body shop guy was also shocked that she walked off uninjured alhamdulilah.

Car accidents are a really scary reality. So many individuals i know have gotten in car accidents that have either lead to their death, or major injury. So many times people are blasting music and die with the words to some song on their lips. SubhanAllah this is one of the major reasons I have given up listening to music. Lets forget the permissibility issue for just a moment and think about how much time we spend in our cars. Statistics also show that accidents are the number one cause of death in young adults, so why have the angel of death greet you with eminem blasting in the background...

Back to my car ride...
I was listening to a CD i had in my car by Imaam Anwar al Awlaki on stories from Hadith. In the CD he was narrating a hadith the dealt with a man who passed away (I believe from bani israel...not sure) and when the angel of death greeted him he asked him(completely paraphrased), "have you ever done good in your life" and the man thought and thought, and could not think of a single good thing he did, however he stated, "I remember just one thing that I used to do, when I had a shop I would lend out goods to individuals, and I would allow the wealthy more time to absolve their debt, and I would forgive the debt of the poor". At this point Imaam anwar started to talk about the concept of justice, and how this man went far above and beyond the calls of justice. To be just would be to ask for the payment back in due time, however this man went and absolved the debt. He then began commenting on various forms of debt that we accumulate and began on the topic of backbiting. Subhan'Allah we all hear about backbiting and know that we shouldn't talk ill about people. However subhanAllah shaytan whispers in our ear at our most vulnerable of moments. I thought back to myself and the times that I have backbitten, and they were not times when I just sat around and had nothing better to do so I began talking about people. Rather I remember talking about individuals who angered me up until the point where i felt i had to say something to someone or else I'd explode. They were individuals who I felt had wronged me in some shape or form and I felt i needed some retribution...however what i ended up doing was sharing simple "accounts" of events with my family and friends that spoke negatively of certain individuals..in my head i justified this form of 'backbiting'. Sitting in the car all of these events came rushing back to me. At this point Imaam Anwar was discussing how Imaam Shafai (may Allah be pleased with him) sent fruits to a group of individuals who were backbiting about him and attached a note thanking them for their good deeds. Imaam Anwar narrated that when you backbite not only are you hoarding these messed up thoughts against individuals but you are giving them your good deeds, and if on the day of judgment you run out of these good deeds than you will accumulate this individuals bad deeds...

SubhanAllah...

anyway point being...i was kinda a bit shaken up knowing well that if i too were to get into an accident at this point in time i would have this burden lying upon me. At this point in the tape Imaam Anwar began to speak about tawbah, and how we can ask Allah subhana wa ta ala forgiveness for virtually anything and how Allah subhana wa ta ala will gladly and happily forgive us. However certain situations dealing with wrongdoing others have to be dealt directly. In the case of backbiting you have to ask the individual you backbit about for forgiveness directly, however if you believe that confronting them will lead to further animosity you may ask Allah to forgive this individual and make dua for them.

So at about 2:45 am driving down the LIE i thought about every person I could have possibly ever talked bad about and made some massive dua for them...

the door to tawbah is open up until the point the angel of death comes to greet you, or until the sun rises from the west and sets in the east..as imaam anwar narrates...so lets get on it kids :)

May Allah subhana wa ta ala forgive us for our shortcomings may He make us amongst those that He loves, and may He teach us to love one another for His sake...
Ameeen..

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

A Series of Unfortunate Events..

2006-05-20T01:22:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah from Miami,

Recently I've heard a handful of some really unfortunate and devastating stories, however due to some promises I will not share these stories.

What I will do is reflect on them inshaAllah. Each of the narratives I have heard about these events, the individual involved did not directly do an action that lead to their predicament. Meaning, their present situation was not necessary a direct result of what they did nor a reflection of their character.

That makes it all the more harder to digest. Many a times we hear about things that happen to people, yet somewhere in our heart we relish in the fact that it did not happen to us, somehow patting ourselves on the back for not placing ourselves in such a situation where the event could present itself to us. However how do we console ourselves when we know that this too could happen to us at any moment in time...

SubhanAllah we all take many precautions before getting married or making any major decisions, however at times despite all that we do we have to know that our knowledge in the future is not complete and leave it up to Allah subhana wa ta ala. After all this, then how do we deal with these misfortunes that fall upon us and others? In the various stories I've heard, different individuals have reacted differently. One person completely seemed to break down, and lose almost all imaan, while the other remained unselfishly steadfast in her situation...

what made one act the way she did, and the other completely opposite? Allah hu alim...
but it does make me think that if, by some chance, I was placed in the situation would I have the imaan to be steadfast in the face of the adversity.

This reminds me of a dream that I am constantly having...I don't know how appropriate it is to put it up here but I shall inshaAllah...
I know I constantly hope and pray that I will die in a state of imaan with the shahadah on my lips and a smile on my face, praying that death does not seize me at a point in time when I am far from Allah subhana wa ta ala. At one point in my life I was constantly dreaming about death...in one of the dreams I recall that I was in Iraq sitting with Saddam Hussein ( I don't know why) he was polishing one of his porches (apparently he had one) when all of a sudden there were missiles hitting his compound...I started running down the street, trying to dodge each missile, up until the point I became tired, and closed my eyes, and started repeating the shahadah to myself, somehow anticipating death, at that moment the scene turned dark and I felt a pain and jolt in my chest and for an instance I thought that my soul had been lifted, and I felt this instantaneous pleasure, imagining that I had died in a state of imaan...

so often we think about how we'll die, or if we were in certain areas how we would react, but when it actually comes upon you, you realize how unplanned it really is...subhanALlah you become so powerless in the slightest of situations. It also goes to show that we so easily pass judgment on people without even thinking twice about their situations...when these situations hit close to home you realize how helpless people really are...

Please make dua for the individuals I have mentioned...or not really mentioned...
may Allah ta ala guide and protect us all, and help us remain steadfast on the path He laid out for usssssssss.......
ameeeeeeeeeen...

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

hi :)

2006-05-16T01:17:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

What a week....or two weeks rather...

Weddings are amazing on so many levels...

In short, it was a weekend of a lot of laughing, smiling, and crying :)

I love Mubeen's parents and her sisters, may Allah fill the void in their hearts...

after the nikkah i was kinda :( and my mom said the cutest thing mashaAllah, she was like 'koyee baath nahin aab meh tumhari subsay achi saheli banjoongy" :) (Don't worry now I'll become your best friend)... Yay for moms :)

Another more random point...

Its amazing how just being in certain people's company humbles you and reminds you of Allah...and when I mean company I mean mere presence...may Allah preserve these individuals...

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Alumni Status...

2006-05-10T02:31:00.000-04:00

And what ... :)

Alhamdulilah :)

Shaadi Season '06..

2006-05-06T01:38:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

as of Saturday, May 06, 2006 shaadi season will officially begin...

Bismillah :)

i shall keep you posted inshaAllah...

(please make dua i don't fail out of college when i only literally have one day left...pretty please)

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Graduation and things

2006-05-05T01:24:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

One final is what keeps me from ending my undergraduate career...granted I will be back for graduate school here in the very same school, however there is something about four years of your life coming to an end that really causes you to re-evaluate ideals, ideas, relationships, everything...

SubhanAllah, just like that life flashes before our eyes. Moments of time that we thought would effect us forever, are easily forgotten, seconds of shame leave their mark on our hearts, and just like that they're gone.

This of course always, reminds me of the inevitable...death. These moments of time where I am caught in a place that I know will be of no benefit to me, I wonder if the angel of death will come to greet me and instead of returning to Allah in a state of joy if I will be ashamed of what I have accumulated...

then there are those moments, where in one breath you feel your heart more alive then ever, calling to Allah with every beat, and you know that there is nothing in the world that would stop you from reminiscing in knowing that you are one step closer to meeting your Lord..

SubhanAllah...a mere decision that was possibly made on a whim can affect something that you work your whole life towards...

Today I was finishing up a final paper and rushing to hand it in before the deadline...as I ran out of my apartment i dawned my glasses, a big old jilbab, and a hijab hardly pinned...i imagined the journey would be short, directly to the middle eastern and islamic studies department and then back before anyone caught hold of me...lo and behold I ran into a handful of acquaintances on the street. They looked at me and smiled as I rushed past them, knowing that this is not a state that I wanted them to see me in...yet I had no expectations for these meetings before leaving my apartment, it was simply by qadr that i ran into them in the street...

my failure to adequately plan the amount of time to properly put in my contacts, iron a decent jilbab, and pin my hijab securely resulted in presenting myself to individuals in a state i would call unfit...

it really makes me think, could death greet me in this same way?

something to think about..

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Obituary for Umm Ibrahim by Shaykh Muhammad

2006-05-02T20:26:00.000-04:00

OBITUARY FOR AL-HAJJAH FARIZAH RABBAT UMM IBRAHIM AL-YAQOUBI AL-HASANI

BY SHAYKH MUHAMMAD AL-YAQOUBI AL-HASANI

GRIEF AND SORROW
UPON THE LOSS OF MY HEART

My Dear Brothers and Sisters, Relatives, Friends, Students and Supporters throughout the world:

As-Salamu `Alaykum Wa Rahmatullah Wa Barakatuh

“Indeed, we belong to Allah, and to Him we must surely return!”

With grief and sorrow, I share with you the tragic loss of my beloved wife, my companion, and the love of my heart Al-Hajjah Farizah Aal Rabbat, Known as Umm Ibrahim, Rahimaha Allah, who is also the mother of my three children (Aisha, Ibrahim and Ismael).

Allah chose her out of this world to enter al-Jannah on the very birthday of His Beloved Prophet Rasulullah (Sallalahu ‘alayhi wasallam) through the door of martyrs. I do not object to His Will: we belong to Him and our return is to Him; whatever He takes is indubitably His, and whatever He gives is undoubtedly His.

She left this world on Monday 12th of Rabi’ Al-Awwal, 1427 (corresponding to April 10th 2006), around 5:00 pm in a car accident while she was driving from our home outside Damascus heading to the city to visit her family and attend a Mawlid party. At the same time, I was leading a Mawlid feast in the city. She died at 37 years of age, and was approximately five months pregnant with a baby boy who was not saved in the accident. Just a few hours before the accident we had agreed to name him Shareef.

With her in the car, she had our three children, Aisha, Ibrahim and Ismael who are 8, 6, and 5 years old respectively; and her maid Nour. By the Bounty of the Most Generous they survived the accident but were all injured at various levels. They are still in the hospital being treated. Please continue to make Du`aa for them.

On Sunday night, (the night of 12th of Rabi’ Al-Awwal), we had a blessed Mawlid Gathering in our home. Monday, the day she died, we had brunch together with the kids and I told her I wanted to take her and the kids in August to al-Madina al-Munawwara, where she can deliver her baby. She was extremely happy and took my word that I will name the boy Shareef.

I left home at 1:30 pm on Monday for a Dars and a Mawlid in the city of Damascus. At 5:15 pm I received the news of the accident and immediately headed to the hospital, only to find out that she had given her last breaths. Later on, the rescuers told us that when they reached her she was alive moving her lips (presumably with shahada, and dhikr) but could not make it to the hospital.

As an English teacher, Umm Ibrahim worked in a neighboring school teaching the first three grades, a job she had for the past three years and she always considered it an important mission; it fulfilled her ambitions. She liked to improve herself through reading and training, through which she acquired many skills in recent years, including NLP and Homeopathy. She loved social activities and had a strong personality. She was an excellent housewife and a great cook.

But most of all, what distinguished Umm Ibrahim, and the reason for which I had chosen her as a wife, was her righteousness, persistence in ‘Ibadah, and her sincerity to the Deen. For instance, in the last few months of her life, she used to pray 100 rak’as of Salah everyday. She recited Surat al-Baqara everyday, oftentimes with Surat al-An’am. Qiyam al-Layl decorated her nights, and was something she would hardly miss.

She always had new ideas to promote Da`wah and attract people to the true way of Islam. She devoted her life to her family and to students of sacred knowledge. After prayer and recitation of al-Qur’an, nothing was dearer to her than serving the students, cooking for them, and taking care of their needs.

The night before she died, she prepared food for my guests as we were having a feast in our home on the occasion of 12th of Rabi’ Al-Awwal, the anniversary of the Birth of the Beloved of Allah. Six days earlier, on Tuesday 6th Rabi’ Al-Awwal, she cooked for 150 guests, insisting she did not want to order the food. She used to prepare the most delicious food at our weekly Dhikr session for 50 people. One week before she died, she said, when I was trying to convince her to order food, “I find cooking for the students light and easy, and I don’t want to be deprived from its rewards, I know what they like, and the food brought from the market is fatty for them”. Such was her amazing dedication.

Moreover, she liked Jabr al-Khawatir, so at Eid times, she used to prepare bags full of sweets and gifts to hand over to kids in poor neighborhoods. She used to make Eid parties for the foreign students and organize special programs for their children.

Some 3000 people attended her funeral, which took place on Tuesday after Zuhr prayer at Jami` al-Badr in Damascus. Three years ago, upon a visit to Bab al-Sagheer cemetery, where my ancestors are buried, she said to me, “When I die, bury me in the graves of your family, I want to be with Ahl al-Bayt”

By the Grace of Allah, she was buried bearing a grandson of the Beloved Messenger of Allah, in the grave of my mother, Al-Sayyida Ameenah Mansoor al-Jaza’iry al-Hasani, who passed away also in the month of April in 1996, just a few months before myself and Umm Ibrahim got married. Umm Ibrahim had met my mother one week before my mother died. Her grave is only a few meters away from the daughter of Imam al-Husain, Sayyidah Fatima al-Sughra.

I am happy with her now, and I was happy with her before she died, as she was happy with me. In the past few weeks before she died, she told her mother and a few friends over the phone, even the morning of her death, how much she was happy in her marriage; According to a Prophetic statement when a woman dies while her husband is happy with her she will enter al-Jannah. I have seen several signs that she will be in al-Jannah. Obviously, the servants of the Ahl al-Bayt will be in al-Jannah, let alone the wives or mothers of Ahl al-Bayt.

Many outstanding personalities and scholars spoke during the three-day sessions of condolences held on her behalf. They included: Sayyid al-Fatih al-Kittani, Shaykh Dr. Sa`eed Ramadan al-Bouti; Shaykh Kurayyim Rajih, Shaykh Dr. `Abd al-Latif Farfoor, Shaykh Abdullah Rabih, Shaykh Abdul Aziz al-Khateeb, Shaykh Abul Hasan al-Kurdi, Shaykh Ahmad Ramadan, Shaykh Na’im al-‘Araqsoosi, Shaykh Sariyah al-Rifa’i, and many others.

Last but not least, I would like to offer my deepest thanks and gratitude to all the scholars, the friends, and the students, male and female, in Syria and throughout the world, who supported me and my children and Umm Ibrahim’s family in this difficult time in any form. Nothing is enough to thank the many thousands of brothers and sisters in Damascus and around the globe who stood with us during this trial.

I beg you to continue your Du`aa for the full recovery of the children. Make Du`aa especially that Allah help the three children cope with the loss of their mother, and that the shock, when they learn the news, may easily be absorbed. Make Du’aa for her parents, as the tragic loss is indeed difficult for them. And please do continue to make special Du`aa for Umm Ibrahim that Allah grant her Mercy and Forgiveness and reward her with Jannatul Firdaws.

I end with the following dreams. A Syrian sister saw Umm Ibrahim coming into a room, filled with light. Umm Ibrahim said to her, “Don’t worry about me; I am in the best state”. A brother by the name Zahir saw her calling Imam Abul Hasan al-Shadhiliy, which shows the blessings in the attachment to our great shadhili silsila, as she was part of it, took tariqa over a year ago. Another sister saw on the same morning she died, that a righteous woman passed away in Damascus, during the day, she learned of the death of Umm Ibrahim.

Yes, indeed Umm Ibrahim did not survive the accident but in fact she did survive in my heart and I am sure she will survive in the hearts of those who love her.

May Allah grant her the highest ranks in al-Jannah and the company of my Grandfather, our Master, the best of creation, the Beloved Messenger of Allah, Salla Allahu ‘alayhi wasallam.
May Allah give her her book in her right hand and let her enter Jannah without reckoning.
May He make her grave a garden from the Gardens of Paradise.
May Allah reward all brothers and sisters, and shaykhs and ‘Ulama, and everyone who made Du’a for her and for me and for the children in the best way.
May Allah protect them and their families, their parents and their children and allow us all to meet in Jannatul Firdaws in the company of the Elect and the Beloved of Allah, Rasulullah Salla Allahu ‘alayhi wasallam.
Allahumma Ameen.

The Unworthy servant of the people pf Allah,
Muhammad.

2006-05-02T13:31:00.000-04:00

Duas

Duas

Duas

:)

My Sabbath

2006-04-29T00:48:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

SubhanAllah it's just one of those days...

like once in a while, you just look around at every single moment and thing that surrounds you and you realize how perfect and beautiful Allah subhana wa ta ala in His Might and Glory is...

I don't even know where to begin, i woke up this morning and was walking to jummah and i just looked up at the sky, and the color of the sky was like amazing, and the way that my hijab felt on my neck was amazing, and the breeze that went through the park was amazing...

later at about 9:30 pm i was invited to the Broffman Center for Jewish Life at NYU, and upon entering i had no idea what to expect. I got there and stood up in front of about 100 jewish students and just told them about what its like to be muslim on a daily basis. What we go through, how our days are. And subhanAllah the responded in such a positive way, and after the Q&A session and after my talk, a handful of students stuck around till midnight and just sat and talked to us about, faith, about Allah, and about our deen. and you realize, that subhanAllah at the end of the day, though we have Islam and we have Allah, there are those out there that also have a love for Allah subhana wa ta ala, and though there may be things that seperate us from them, there is that common bond between us, and that love is something that surpasses anything. How can a heart not love another heart who loves his Beloved? I looked at these people with a newfound respect, I wanted to know more about them, and subhanAllah some of them are soooo close to Islam.

Yet as I walked away from there I realized that there is nothing in the world more beautiful then Islam. Because our deen subhanAllah has something so absoulely beautiful that their deen can not compare. And that is Muhammad salalalhualayhi wa salam. Honestly as I sat there and talked to them so many times the Rasools name came to my lips, and the reference that came to their lips were the works of many scholars, which subhanAllah is amazing, but they lacked this integral part of their deen, the walking Quran, the humanistic side of all deen. I still remember one thing that one of the guys said, he was trying to explain to me a concept of their deen and was stating how certain things in their deen are haraam, and so what the rabbis have done is that they take whatever is haraam and take it a step up, and make things that are not haraam haraam so as to avoid the initial haraam. So i was sitting there, and i was like subhaaaaaaaan'Allah, this is why our deen is the middle path. The Jews have made their deen difficult upon themselves and have taken that which Allah has made lawful upon them and made it unlawful...and it can be argued that the Christians have done the opposite and taken what Allah has made unlawful and made it lawful. This is why our deen is perfection, alhamdulilah....

I know these concepts may seem simple, but I just saw them in practice tonight and it was an enlightening experience.

May Allah subhana wa ta ala open our hearts to His light.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

The Pre-Reqs

2006-04-28T01:11:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

a conversation i had with someone today:

X: this brother asked me if u wanted to get married
Me: yep
Me: i do
X: to him?
Me: lol
Me: i dont know who it is
X: this brother
he takes almaghrib classes
but hes pretty open minded
Me: hes into tasawwuf?
X: he doesnt really know anything bout t
i told him he should read up on it
Me: cool
you are a smart man
X: but all his aqeedah
is from almaghrib
i dunno if that works for u or not
Me: hes like hardcore into maghrib?
al*
X: he took the minara program too
Me: does he believe in madhabs
and following one

X: i think i know you
Me: u think i dont follow a madhab?
X: better then i know most people
X: no
but i told him that i knew what the first few questions would be that u'd ask me
Me: did i ask them?
X: yea more or less

Am i predictable or what...

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

Do not abandon your search...

2006-04-26T00:41:00.000-04:00

Whether you are fast or slow, eventually you will find what you are seeking. Always devote yourself wholeheartedly to your search. Even though you may limp or be bent double, do not abandon your search, but drag yourself ever toward Him.
-Maulana Jalaluddin Rumi (rahmatullahi 'alayhi)

the weekend

2006-04-24T01:06:00.001-04:00

:)

assalamualiakum wa rahmatullah!

Where to begin........

ummmmmmmmmm how about..........friday :)

On Friday I went to the Strawberryfest as a stinky old senior, and the islamic center was representin with a booth in which we did free arabic 'calligraphy' and gave out fast-a-thon shirts for free. Alhamdulilah i must say that we were one of the most popular tables there. Tons of people came up to us and wanted to get their name written in Arabic, while they waited we chit-chatted about Islam and Arabic. While i was on line purchasing my NYU Seniors sweatshirt i saw this girl like staring at me...naturally i assumed she was attracted to my radiant face (lol jk), but then i realized that this has never happend in the past and thus is not the case, not trying to dwell on the situation i looked her way and flashed a million dollar smile, and she, alhamdulilah, returned it. So she came closer and was like "do you remember me" and i ofcourse did my :) uhhhhhh face..where im thinking of all the possible place i could have seen this gori (white) girl...so she put me out of my misery and was like remember you came to the senior class meeting to talk about the fast-a-thon earlier in the year, and i was like oooooh yeeeeaaaaa, i remember you and so she's like "i saw you a couple of weeks ago at the protest/teach-in, i sat and listened to your talk, and i was brought to tears, and began to cry, what you said about your Prophet and your religion was beautiful, i told everyone in my masters' program and they were all sorry they missed it" , so at this point, im like wait what...but she basically said thanks, and i think read the confusion on my face and jetted. Anyway after the many hate emails it was a breath of fresh air to hear positive feedback from a non-muslim :)

After the strawberry-fest i did NOT attend my first islamic center meeting...sad face...but alhamdulialh its a great eboard and i wish them allllllll the best :)

Now i will proceed to the Sadia's Bridal shower part of the post. After Jummah, after the strawberryfest, and after lunch, dora and i headed down to canal street to pick up sadia's bridal shower cake. Along the way i stopped off and spent a lot of money on a lot of unnecessary clothes that don't fit me that i have decided to "gift" to other people...but alhamdulialh its all good...we finally made it down to canal street 2 hours later (not good considering its like a 15 minute walk), and go to the chinese bakery where we ordered the cake from. To our surprise they didn't "get" our order but promised us the 6-pound cake would be done in........30 minutes....30 minutes! I can't even boil water in 30 minutes..but sure enough they did make the cake in 30 minutes. After this dora struggled with the 6 lb cake and i ran outside to find a cab......while i was doing this many individuals on the street proceeded to laugh at us, ask both dora and i if we were muslim, and many other random things. Finally the cab driver pulled over, and when we got in he was laughing and asked "are u going to a birday", and we responded in the negative. We finally reached back to our building to realize that the elevator is broken, so we had to take the service elevator up...after we got back to our apartment we all started packing our things for our mini-vacation to Jamaica (queens :)). I was very impressed at our light packing, we all (nadia dora maghrib and myself) managed to get our things in one pullmen, however we also had maghrib (the cat), the 6 lb cake, the wedding favors, and many other good things. We finally after many dramatic instances on the street, including one broken car window, dora's skirt flying up up up, almost getting stuck in the turnstile and muggy's constant crying and whining made it onto the subway. Maghrib then proceeded to cry the whole one hour to sadia's house.

The rest of the weekend is extremely girly so i will leave it out, however i will mention some points.

1- on friday night maghrib greeted us at 3 in the morning with a 'gift' in her mouth, looking at her the roomates and i couldn't really decipher what this gift was, and thought maybe she found a dustball or a toy, however we saw this 'gift' move and realized....it was a mouse...so we all screamed very very loud which made maghrib and the mouse excited which made muggy drop the mouse, which made us scream more...and yes...it was all very exciting..after this i had a huge jihad un nafs because i had to pray isha and i was really really scared hte mouse would dance on my head when i made sujood, but i won the jihad and did pray !

2- sadia kalam is the cutest bride in the whole entire world. MashaAllah mashaAllah mashaAllah :)

3- bridal shower games are mad fun

4- the cake was soooooooooooooo good

5- someone who i had met for the first time came up to me and told me i was a really loud/aggressive/good leader type of person, and the two girls that were next to her were liek yeaaaaa she was our president at the msa so she has practice..the girl laughed and was like ohhhhhhhh thats why everyone listens to you...i didn't realize this was true until we were all sitting around doing nothing, and everyone was trying to get the other to dance, at which point i looked at one of the girls and was like "so and so, DANCE" so she got up and danced..lol ...at this point one of the girls was like whoa how'd ud o that..and the girl was like dude when maheen tells u to do something u do it... :)

6- weddings and all related activities are extremelyyyy sentimental; you should always carry a pack of tissues :)

7- once again im making a list :)

8- the highlight of the night was after maghrib when we sat down, recited some quran, read a dua, and sang some nasheeds... :)

9- Muslim girls are the bestttttt :) (and dora :))

So this was the first of the wedding summer '06 season, but inshaAllah there will be much much more to come (11 weddings i've counted)! May Allah subhana wa ta ala bless the brides, the grooms, their families, their guests, and you, and me :)

ameeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeen....

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah
beace in the middle east!

Copying and pasting fi'sabililah

2006-04-15T23:29:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

all taken from http://copynpastefisabilillah.blogspot.com:

My Greatest Need is You

Your hope in my heart is the rarest treasure
Your Name on my tongue is the sweetest word
My choicest hours
Are the hours I spend with You --
O Allah, I can't live in this world
Without remembering You--
How can I endure the next world
Without seeing Your face?
I am a stranger in Your country
And lonely among Your worshippers:
This is the substance of my complaint.
~Rabia al 'Adawiyya Rahimahullah

It is reported by Mu'adh Radhi'Allahuanhu that The Prophet (sallallahu `alayhi wa sallam) said: "Allah (subhanahu wa ta`ala) said: 'Those who love one another for My glory, will have minbars of light, and the Prophets and martyrs will wish that they had the same."

~Reported by al-Tirmidhi, who said it is a hasan sahih hadith

Tidbits of advice from beautiful shuyukh......

"How many times should you forgive someone?"
- "As many as times as you wish for Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala to forgive you."

~from a program with Shaykh Ibrahim Memon damat barakatuhu

"You have to strive ******, you have to strive. This is life, and isn't that what life is, striving? You have to strive because this is life ******, and life is striving."
~Maulana Kamal, may Allah increase him insha'Allah
*name starred out for privacy of person.
:( :( :( :) :) :) <-- weird emotions...

"For everything that you part from, there is a replacement,
But if you disassociate from Allah, there is no replacement for Him."
~ Shaykh Zulfiqar, may Allah increase him

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah....
duaaaas

tourny

2006-04-15T22:59:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah..

I guess I'll update now .... :)

i just got back from philly and have had a very loooooong day....

to start with... if one were to examine my forearms, which many would not be able to, due to layers and layers of clothing i decide to wear every single day..but if they WERE it would seem as if I was an abused child :( bruises everywhere, popped blood vessals.....yep you know the deal...before you go and call the cops on my parents/roommate/cat/mubeen i'll have you know that i participated in the islam-i-delphia volleyball tournanment today...and after likeeee two years finally touched a volleyball again....

the first volleyballs they brought out like literally abused me...and i know i haven't played in a looong time but they really aren't supposed to be so hard that you have to grab your arms in pain, so mubeen, nidz and myself picked up some from old navy ($5!!!)...and so the games began...

if any of you really know me, you know im psycho....and super super super competative...i don't like to lose, i trash talk, i push, all of that fun stuff...but alhamdulilah i was able to control myself today..lol and i was on a team with 3 other psychos who are just as crazy as myself, but alhamdulilah we pulled through anddddd wooonnnnnnnnn....yaaaaaaaaaaayyyy...

lol i guess you had to be there?

me mubeen and aunty also went to edison to look for jewelry for the beautiful bride to beeeee :) :) :) (mashaAllah inshaAllah alhamdulilah!) but we didn't find anything :( sad face...the girls beautiful though mashaAllah she could be wearing like gaudy artificial gold and still look like a gem mashaAllah :), i don't make friends with ugly people so you know this is truee ;)

this is a mad lame post...i apologize..

oh yeaaaaa alhamdulilah i also got into a masters' program at NYU so im not going anywhere..alhamdulilah! so no more crying at graduation/senior picnic :)

anything else....
hmmmmmmmmm......

nope.

beace..

duas pleeeeeease..
wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

ps--i had some nasheeds on and the cat was chillin on the ground, and then it switched over to a surah, and she jumped on the bed right next to the computer
and sat on my lap...alhamdulilah..animals love to hear quran, try it out one day :)

things i like lots

2006-04-11T01:50:00.000-04:00

assalamualiakum wa rahmatullah,

so instead of writing a post about something fairly important about life and transitions and such i shall focus on the finer points in life...

this is absolutely pointless to read..so just save yourself some time and go browse some other blogs..this is done simply for me to get my mind off of things ..

things i like lots.. (NYU RELATED)

1. Ice....you can just eat it...and it is great.
2. Talking using no contractions..try it one day
3. Talking with fake accents...ghetto..british...hispanic...u name it i do it..
4. Aqsa (shes not a thing) but i love her ...if i don't see her one day i feel sooooo incomplete...
5. Mehak ...she cries with me over absolutely nothing..gotta love it..
6. Chipotle
7. IC baby bros... they're too cute mashaAllah
8. Mr Softee
9. Ice cream
10. um..i would say my cat, but she doesn't sit for one second :(
11. sunlight
12. Grass
13. Trees
14. Chappals
15. making lists
16. babies
17. tallking about eating non-edible things...(babies, cats, etc)
18. lucy ;)
19. strangers that smile and say good morning/night/afternoon
20. holding open elevator doors
21. Random salaams from strangers - minus shady men
22. away messages
23. my sister
24. coming home to a full apt
25. dora ...everything
26. sadia's smile when she talks about her fiance..plus the little dimples that show up..priceless
27. Mugga sitting on nadia's head when she's sleeping
28. Laughing about Kassab's story bout eating raw meat (mehak and aqsa)
29. the dhaf
30. Safeya playing and singing with the dhaf
31. emails.......:)
32. Sadia's Fajr alarm
33. Deeps and Lina...parts of my soul
34. Chaplain saab
35. my parents
36. my parents
37. my parents
38. cafetasia
39. naseeha
40. Sitting in the park (washington square)
41. flowers

:)

and ofcourse sooooo much more...

:)

do not hesitate to add to the list..

Danish Cartoon Event @ NYU Law School

2006-04-08T03:06:00.000-04:00

THE DANISH CARTOONS:
RECONCILING LAW, POLITICS & PASSION

Tuesday, April 11th, 5.00pm-7.30 pm
Tishman Auditorium
New York University School of Law

Law Students for Human Rights and the Islamic Law Students Association at NYU Law have invited a distinguished panel of eminent scholars, including Prof. Noah Feldman (NYU), Prof. Philip Alston (NYU) and Prof. Ervand Abrahamian (CUNY), to engage in a constructive discussion on the Danish cartoons controversy.

Our panelists will discuss the issues arising out of the controversy in their legal, political and religious contexts. Meaningful participation by members of the audience will be encouraged.

The discussion hopes to answer questions at the heart of the controversy: Why are the cartoons offensive to Muslims? To what extent is there a right to respect for one's religious beliefs? What limitations and responsibilities attach to the exercise of freedom of expression? What is the broader political context in which the controversy has emerged? Did the ensuing violence have any implications for the debate? Is there a framework within which respect for religious beliefs and freedom of expression can be reconciled?

Venue: Tishman Auditorium, New York University School of Law, 40 Washington Square South (use MacDougal St. entrance), New York, NY , 10012

Date & Time: 5.00 pm to 7.30 pm.

Important instructions:

Doors open at 5.00 pm. Please arrive at 5.00 pm to allow sufficient time for security procedures.
Guests must enter at the MacDougal Street entrance to the law school.
Please bring photo IDs.
Avoid bringing bags.
We urge our guests not to display the cartoons in any manner. We hope to create a safe and respectful environment for the discussion, and we request your cooperation in this respect.
No cameras or tape recorders.

Student Teaching --Islam

2006-04-06T01:57:00.000-04:00

Assalamualiakum wa rahmatullah,

So for the past.....8 years or so I have been going into my old High scchool and student teaching the Global History classes about Islam. I basically tell them the fundamental beliefs and what its like to be a Muslim. A lot of times I get some really funny questions, but generally the kids are fascinated and ask a lot of questions out of a sincere intention. Thats why i love kids, its not like those weirdos that approach you on the street, fire 50 questions at you, and then leave before you even have a chance to smile at them...

SubhanAllah.

I recently decided that i do want to go into teaching...secondary education in social studies to be exact, so inshaAllah i hopeeee this will be right up my alley.

Anywho I have been asked to student teach at a school here in Manhattan for one day. I have never gone to this school so I don't really know what to expect. Here is the email that the Student teacher wrote to me:

Hi Maheen,
We're still on for this Friday, but I just wanted to keep you updated as
to what my kids are doing...
we started the "Growth of Islam" Unit today, and I began by asking them
to write down things they "knew about Muslims." Here is the compiled
list of what each class gave me:

Period 4: mostly polytheistic, Allah = supreme god, very spiritual,
don't eat pork, females must cover top to bottom, pray five times a day,
wear clothes different from us (no jeans), own or attend mosques, sounds
like they sing when they talk, believe pork is damned, Friday nights are
holy, they don't go to the dentist, some men have several wives, they
wash their feet before bed, they fast, they say "Allah-u-akbar" and
"Selaam-a-Lakum."

Period 5: they have their own type of religion, women are different
from men, women cover themselves--depending on their husband, pray 5
times a day, women wear scarves, dont' eat pork, fast for one month,
meditate, they love peace, they believe in one god (Allah), their men
are strong, they believe in life after death, have strong cultural beliefs.

I wrote down everything anyone volunteered, regardless of accuracy...I
told them they'd learn some of their ideas were wrong today, which they
did as we discussed Muhammad, Allah, and the Five Pillars of Islam, and
then some I'm hoping you can address on Friday.

Tomorrow we're reviewing the Five Pillars, and then getting into more
history with the Umayyid dynasty and the Abbasid Empire; I'll also have
them come up with questions they'd like to ask you. I'll send you
another email tomorrow evening to let you know how it goes.

-------

So some of these preconceived notions I have heard before, however some of them are new :)
I was wondering what kind of things I could talk to them about, since he left it pretty much open to me. So i would appreciate lots and lots of comments on ideas of what i can do. As for 'props' I usually bring in a Quran, a janemaaz..and thats about it. I usually do a short intro and encourage the kids to ask me questions. I also noticed a lot of questions about dress, and the funniest thing is almost every time i go into teach at my old highschool i show up in 100 percent black...haha...this year i remembered that every year the kids ask me if i *have* to wear black, so i made an effort to wear some color, and the kids didn't ask the black question :) So i willll make an effort to NOT wear black...maybe a nice shade of pink ;) hah..jk. I was thinking something that doesn't look too 'foreign' since that was also one of the things mentioned above....so we shall seeeeeee.

anyway its 2 in the am and im sitting and drinking OJ..so i should most probably sleeb.

pleeeeeease keep me in your duas,
as all of you (or most of you that I know that are reading this) are in mine :)

And ofcourse....Allah subhana wa ta ala knows best...always :)

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

ps --random side not that should probably be a post on its own...but have you noticed how DIFFERENT guys' blogs are...girls subhanAllah talk about all these feelings and what they go through on a daily basis, and guys, for the most part post on random other things..

weird..

The Rasool's Ummah...My ummah

2006-04-03T02:12:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

i've said this many a times...but sometimes it feels like im dying.

Sometimes a series of events seem so great, and fall so nicely into place that it seems the end is inevetibly here...
this past year seems like just that.

I would go into detail, but subhanAllah even if i attempted to do so i feel like this feeling is so intrinsic that i would just not make any sense whatsoever...

what i mean to say i guess...is that we know everything happens for a reason. Allah subhana wa ta ala grants us people and things, and through time we begin to love these items so much, and they become so close to us, and we only realize their importance when they are defamed in front of our face, or are taken away from us.

This past week a group on campus tried to defame the individual whom no words can do justice to, the individual, salalahualayhi wa salam, whose name brings tears to the eyes of millions of individuals, the individual who is the beloved of the Most Beloved.

I had wrote a post about the danish cartoon some months ago, but this time my love and my words were tested. How would i react? Events like this call for a lot of hikma, and trust me I have none, so then how can i possibly show the university at large what the Rasool salalhualayhi wa salam means to us? For three days and nights, I couldn't eat, I couldn't sleep, I couldn't think, i couldn't do anything. Hours of meeting with unversity officials seemed hopeless...yet those around me refused to give up hope. We plotted, and we planned, yet everything seemed against us.

Nights were spent when many of the Muslims on campus shed tears on their janemaazs, and when their tongues were softened by salawat upon the Prophet salalahualayhi wa salam. I saw examples of what it means to be a true Muslim. In the day we used all means necessary to prevent this event from occurring, and at night we beseeched the All mighty, knowing that without him all of our actions would be pointless...

Even when everyone told us it would be virtually impossible to carry out the task we had set out to do, we remained steadfast.

Alhamdulilah in the end, who came out victorious? the cartoons were not shown, not because the club decided to have mercy fill their hearts, rather they knew with the circumstance they would be unable to do the task they set out to accomplish.

whats the moral of this story? for the past couple of months i have been unaware of my purpose here at nyu, and for some reason i didn't want it to end. now however, i feel like this event closed a chapter of my life. this event took place in the last week of my 'presidancy' and forced me to stand up in front of students, faculty, and staff and profess my love for the Rasool salalahualayhi wa salam, it forced me to act.

it also makes me think, that though this is the most noble of causes one has to stand for, it made me realize what it means to really really be a Muslim. It made me stand up and tell people who i am, and what that entails. it made me realize, if only for an instance, what it means to be part of this ummah. On so many levels i realized how great it is to be part of the Rasool salalhualayhi wa salam's ummah. An ummah unlike any other ummah...individuals were ready to sacrifice everything in their being to make sure that this man's image was not tarnished in any way shape or form. now you tell me, has their ever been any man to walk this earth to attain this status? It made me realize the torment that the sahabah lived in when, on a daily basis they would see people mock the Prophet...it made me realize what the sahabah felt when they waited in the Madinah sun hoping to catch an image of the Rasool walking into Yathrib..it made me realize why the ummah went into havoc when they heard of the death of rasool salalhualayhi wa salam...it made me realize why he, and only he will be able to give intercession for us on the day of judgement..

i know i can never do this topic any justice...however that does not mean that i will stop at any lengths trying...

May Allah subhana wa ta ala send peace and blessings upon His beloved rasool...
May Allah subhana wa ta ala make us amongst the ummah of Rasoolallah..

I recieved a lot of hate mail and phone calls this week, however i also recieved so many words of love and encouragement, may Allah subhana wa ta ala have mercy upon these individuals and provide ease for them now, and in the hearafter as they had provided ease for me..

and i'd like to leave you all with an image painted by one of those emails :

"Have tawakkul, make dua, be strong, stay composed, remember the ones before you who went through something greater than this great task, and imagine the person of the Rasul PBUH on the day of judgement when he recognizes you as the one who stood up for him that day when others rediculed him, and he gives you to drink from his hand insha Allah."

"Putting everything aside, we're muslim and alhamdillah, thats the most beautiful gift ever. I've kinda had a rough few days, just very emotional about personal stuff and just seeing what you did was so inspiring and great. So.....I LOVE YOU. I really do, don't ever think Allah is somehow punishing you or mad at you cuz of everything He's just using you for now to gather His muslims and do something amazing "

i love this ummah ...

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

The week in rewind...

2006-03-31T22:25:00.000-05:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

one of the most....draining/amazing/frustrating weeks everrr....

read below:

Prayer and Protest
By Sarah Brummett
Contributing Writer
March 30, 2006

More than 40 students from the NYU’s Islamic Center gathered in the Kimmel Center’s lobby yesterday for a teach-in to discuss their reactions to the controversial Danish cartoons that were supposed to be displayed at a panel discussion held inside the building.

The students originally planned to protest the presentation of the cartoons, but the event’s sponsor, the Objectivist Club, decided to only display blank panels after NYU demanded that it close the event off to the public if it chose to display the cartoons.

For several days before the event, the Islamic Center was in contact with NYU officials requesting that the cartoons not be displayed because members believe the images were racist, promoted religious intolerance and perpetuated hatred, Islamic Center president Maheen Farooqi said.

One of the goals of NYU’s Objectivist Club is “to provide a receptive atmosphere for individuals interested in learning about Ayn Rand’s philosophy of Objectivism,” according its website, nyu.objectivismonline.net. Since the eruption of the Danish Cartoon controversy, the Ayn Rand Institute has begun a “Free Speech Campaign” of panel discussions at universities, like this one hosted by the Objectivist Club.

“You don’t have to have images like these to talk about [freedom of speech],” Farooqi said.

She added that Muslim students were also concerned that the display of the images at the public event would possibly incite violence against members of NYU’s Muslim community. Prior to the event, Islamic Center students bought hundreds of tickets to the event to restrict outside attendance, but when the Objectivists pulled the cartoon’s presentation, they agreed to give back all the tickets so that they could be sold to members outside of the NYU community, Farooqi said.

“We don’t support these images, but we do support the dialogue,” Farooqi said. “We do want to talk about it — we don’t want to just leave ourselves out of it.”

Muslim students were joined in their protests by students from NYU’s Antiwar Network and the Bronfman Center for Jewish Student Life.

“These racist stereotypes of Muslims are being used to justify violence,” Antiwar Network member Elizabeth Wrigley-Field said.

Figures from other groups on campus shared solidarity with the Jewish and Muslim students, including Rabbi Yehudah Sarna of the Bronfman Center, who spoke to the group and said that “the freedom of speech comes with the responsibility to listen.”

Group members said they supported the Islamic Center’s efforts based on their own experience with religious intolerance, hatred and violence.

“This is an emotional moment for me, too — as a Jew, as someone who understands where you’re coming from,” Sarna said.

The teach-in ended with Sarna reciting evening prayers alongside Muslim students outside Kimmel within the protection of police barricades.

After the prayers ended, many of the Muslim students attended the panel discussion.

CAS junior Muniba Hassan said the panel discussion turned out to be worse than she and other protesters suspected it would be.

“We didn’t think they were going to make these generalizations and broad comments on Islam,” Hassan said. “This was very unfair to Muslims.”

People are afraid to address the cartoons, and we shouldn’t have to worry about skirting sensitive issues, said panelist Jonathan Leaf, the resigned editor of the New York Press.

“We lose ability to talk to Muslims and express to them that people around the world are afraid of Islamic violence,” Leaf said.

CAS junior James Ferguson said that many of his worst fears about the event had been confirmed.

“I feel tricked into coming,” Ferguson said. “The flyer said it was about free speech, and a third of the time they talked about Islam and didn’t have any Muslims to give their side.”

Ferguson said one man even asked him if Osama Bin Laden was his hero.

“I was shocked,” Ferguson said. “I didn’t think stereotypes would get that far out of hand. I lost family members in 9/11 — I was very offended by the question. It was living proof that this lecture had everyone hating Muslims.”

--------------------
Cartoon choice backfires
by WSN Staff
March 30, 2006

If you’re really that curious, it’s not too difficult to do a Google search to find the Danish cartoons that portrayed the Prophet Muhammad that have caused so much uproar in the past few months. Not content with that, the NYU Objectivist Club, during a panel discussion on the cartoons last night, planned on having the 12 cartoons on display.
While news of this understandably upset Muslim groups on campus, with some level of compromise, the event could have been an enlightening and helpful discussion on the cartoons and the root of the initial controversy. Instead, after an entire day of negotiations with NYU’s administration, the group decided not to show them at all. In lieu of an educational and informative panel discussion, it turned into a tense and hostile airing of the speakers’ indignation that ultimately contributed nothing.

Freedom of speech — as has been pointed out ad infinitum since the controversy began — extends to the freedom to insult and offend. At an Objectivists’ event, they had the right to display whatever they want without bending to opponents.

The Islamic Center, however, offered a number of alternatives to simply not showing the cartoons, and it would have easily been possible to arrange to show them for a short time, so those who would be offended wouldn’t have to look at them. Displaying the cartoons all night would have completely driven devout Muslims from the event, which would have narrowed the scope of the debate even further. And although, as one panelist mentioned, hate speech is certainly protected by the First Amendment, the hostility it engenders is anathema to a constructive discussion on the issue. Some of the panelists’ more outrageous and offensive statements about Islam is testament to such a statement.

It seems unfortunate that, even with assistance from a third party, they were still unable to work out a mutually beneficial agreement that would have allowed for a more balanced debate. As a result, everyone lost out. It ended up dealing less with the actual issue at hand and more with the panelists’ anger at having their toy taken away.

-------

I will post my comments later... (maybe)

Word Cloud

2006-03-26T16:49:00.000-05:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

here is something interesting i found off of snapshirts.com.

The site basically compiles the most common words in your blog and makes a snapshot of them into a 'word cloud'...

Intereseting stuff :)

Time...

2006-03-26T01:00:00.000-05:00

assalamualiakum wa rahmatullah,

echoing the last post i found this on hahmed.com/blog :

Imam al-Ghazali on Time
March 20th, 2006
Source: Sunnipath

“You should not neglect your time or use it haphazardly; on the contrary you should bring yourself to account, structure your litanies and other practices during each day and night, and assign to each period a fixed and specific function. This is how to bring out the spiritual blessing (baraka) in each period.But if you leave yourself adrift, aimlessly wandering as cattle do, not knowing how to occupy yourself at every moment, your time will be lost. It is nothing other than your life, and your life is the capital that you make use of to reach perpetual felicity in the proximity of God the Exalted.

Each of your breaths is a priceless jewel, since each of them is irreplaceable and, once gone, can never be retrieved. Do not be like that deceived fools who are joyous because each day their wealth increases while their life shortens.

What good is an increase in wealth when life grows ever shorter? Therefore be joyous only for an increase in knowledge or in good works, for they are your two companions who will accompany you in your grave when your family, wealth, children and friends stay behind.”

Imam Al Ghazali (May Allah have mercy on him) wrote this in his book: ‘The Beginning of Guidance’

Now, how do you spend your time? (rhetorical question)

almost time to say goodbye...

2006-03-26T00:29:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

So the time is finally approaching, I have been avoiding writing about this for a while now because I don't quite know how to express my feelings on it. Within the past couple of weeks I have realized that I am afraid of change. I am not necessarily afraid of what is to come, but I am more afraid to let go of what I already have. Alhamdulilah the past four years of my life have been so so amazing...

When I first walked into the city I did not know what to expect. What I saw was a group of Muslims, very different from any group of Muslims I had met before. However I was still very reluctant and did not know if I had made the best decision by attending NYU. But here I am now, almost four years later, unable to let go and imagine life without the Muslims I have encountered. SubhanAllah...this kind of goes hand in hand with my last post. I spoke about blessings that somehow have been slipping away from my life, and sometimes I wonder if the Islamic Center will also be one of those blessings that will just slip through my hands.

I have also been told that this is not a denial of a blessing, rather it is simply change. However I can't just imagine this period of my life simply as a couple of years that will transition me into a new portion of my life. How can I? I met the most amazing Muslims, learned so much about my deen, about my Creator, and about my Rasool salalahualayhi wa salam through these individuals, how then can my heart not be attached to them?

Its amazing the advice that has been bestowed on us from our predecessors lasts and lasts. How many times have we been told to not take a single moment for granted, how many times have we been told that we will look back to these days with tears in our eyes. I look back at these days, and alhamdulilah I was bestowed with numerous opportunities to do good, to help others, and to sit with those who possess knowledge, and though I may have taken advantage of some of these opportunities, now I wonder how many of these opportunities I let fly by. This reminds me of the hadith that says to value five things: "Youth before old age, health before sickness, wealth before poverty, free time before preoccupation, and life before death." These four years of my undergraduate career were perhaps the prime of my youth, and the time when I would have the most amount of free time. Looking back, I really do wonder how wisely this time was spent, and if looking back on the Day of Judgement I will look back to these days with a smile on my face, or a tear stricken face...inshaAllah i do pray it is the former. and not the latter.

"There are seven people for whom Allah will provide His shade on the day when there will be no shade except His shade: 1. A just ruler. 2. A youth who grew up in the worship of Allah. 3. A man whose heart is attached to the mosque. 4. Two men who love each other for Allah's sake; they meet for the sake of Allah and part company for His sake. 5. A man who is invited by a woman of beauty and position [to sin], but he refuses saying: 'I fear Allah.' 6. A man who gives in charity secretly such that his left hand does not know what his right hand gives. 7. A man whose eyes shed tears as he remembers Allah in private." [Bukhari, Muslim].

Reading this hadith I think about my time at the IC, and think about how many opportunities were given to us as youth to aid one another in the worship of Allah subhana wa ta ala. Here we had a community based up of this single perogative. That is simply what we are, a group of youth dedicated to obeying Allah subhana wa ta ala, everything else is secondary. I think about the days that we would sit in the musallah waiting for Maghrib to roll in so that we could pray together (number 3), and perhaps one of the most closest points to my heart, number 4, two individuals who love each other for the sake of Allah subhana wa ta ala, they meet for his sake, and part of His sake. I think about the times I would just walk into the islamic center and would be greeted by salaams and smiles from sisters (and sometimes brothers) that I never met before, here we'd sit for His, subhana wa ta ala's sake, and in His name would we depart. I wonder, after I graduate how many more times I will be granted these same opportunities.

It has been said that you never know how valuable or great something is, until its gone. And here I am each witnessing each second slip from beneath me, knowing that in a matter of weeks I will no longer be part of this blessed community. I pray that Allah subhana wa ta ala continues to bless this group of youth, as well as the Islamic Center and allows it to flourish under the banner of Islam. I pray that those of us that now have to leave the Islamic Center (and NYU) have greater blessings in store for us, and that we too remain loyal first and foremost to Him and only Him.

Ameen.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

2006-03-25T02:19:00.000-05:00

I have written this post like 6 times but each time it has not come out right.

So inshaAllah instead I shall leave you in the dark and await another day... :)

until then...

beace in the middle east..

where the blessings at?

2006-03-24T02:16:00.000-05:00

Assalamualiakum wa rahmatullah.................

The other day I had a conversation with someone whom I consider to be very wise...this person is only a few years older than me, but in wisdom probably surpasses me by decades. The topic came to blessings, and how alhamdulilah we are witnessing many individuals around us getting married, engaged, having children, etc. These blessings seem to be falling like rain alhamdulilah.

So then, what is the problem?

Perhaps this may not be the right way to look at things, but sometimes when you see blessings all around you, yet your life bereft of them, you begin to ask some important and poignant questions. Namely, where are my blessings?

I don't mean this in an envious way whatsoever, but one does begin to question what the cause of this absense may be...
and in the case of blessings you can't really look to anyone other than Allah subhana wa ta ala.

So, the question remains. Why may someone be enjoying loads and loads of blessings, while another sits waiting for this rahma (mercy) to descend upon him.

We came upon two possibilities.

The first being, the self. The reason that you may be missing out on a certain blessing (marriage) may be because of something that you may have done to earn the wrath or punishment of Allah subhana wa ta ala.

SubhanAllah... can there be a thought as scary as this? Like seriously... if the one desire we have is to have Allah subhana wa ta ala pleased with us, than the most horrendous thing in our eyes would be to gain the exact opposite, and thus be denied His love. Certain things have transpired within the past couple of months, and it makes me think and question what the reason may be. Ofcourse we can not put a reason or question on the Qadr of Allah subhana wa ta ala, but we can look to ourselve and examine our state and see if somehow we may have slipped along the way. I can think of a couple of blessings that have been taken away from me in this time frame, and it really makes me wonder if somewhere along the way I may have done something to earn this punishment.

However, there then lies another possibility. Is the lack of barakah, or blessing in my life a test for me? Is Allah subhana wa ta ala simply testing my patience, and my imaan. If so, what has made me worthy of this test?

So then, how does one decide what course of action to take from here....
another beloved friend of mine suggested this : take a close look at yourself, and see, what am I doing in my life that would cause Allah subhana wa ta ala to be upset with me, and how can I rectify it? She subhanAllah, has transformed herself to making sure that even the littlest of her actions are in accordance with His pleasure. She eats food from her house, so that she is not denied the barakah of it, she excerises regularly so that her body may be more ready for ibaadah.

This goes hand in hand with what I learned last weekend at the Minarah program. The agenda to change our condition is often times in our hands. We have done certain actions that have caused us to transgress from what Allah subhana wa ta ala has prescribed for us. In essence we have rebelled against Allah subhana wa ta ala in many realms of life, and thus caused the barakah from our lives to be lifted... how can we begin to complain of problems our ummah is facing today externally, when we are the cause of our internal problems? Brotherhood (and sisterhood) in itself is a blessing, and if we deny it, then how do we expect Allah subhana wa ta ala to bestow blessing upon our ummah?

So has not the time come for us to sit and reflect on our situation... are we going to have to wait until each and everyone of the blessings of the world has dissipated before we begin to rectify our condition...

The easiest way to start is to simply look inward. Yep, I am talking about that little piece of flesh that if it is sound the rest of the body will be sound, right there on the middle left side of your body, your heart.

May Allah subhana wa ta ala guide and protect us all...

ameen..

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

chillin

2006-03-17T17:14:00.000-05:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah :)

i just came back to the city today after a week...

subhanallah its crazy in the most liveliest and craziest places on earth you find the most relaxation.. I am currently lying on my bed, and my roommate is squished next to me with her head so lovinglly on my shoulder :)

on the other bed lies miss dora lee, and mugga is sleeping on the floor somewhere else...

and its Jummah...

subhanAllah.

you reeeeeeeeeally realize how the little things in life really do make the biggest of differances...

This past week has been crazy..i was in MD, PA, LI, and tomorrow i'll be going to jersey for the minarah program as well. You realize how different each place is, and how different each Muslim community is. When i was in MD, i was amazed at how amazing the muslim community down there is, everyone knows everyone, thier mom, their families, everything! they have such a beautiful community mashaallah...meanwhile in NYC there could be muslims living two blocks from you and you would never know....each city has its charm...each community its strengths. Every time i travel somewhere and am greeted and hosted by other groups of muslims i always think of the Muhajiroon and the Ansar...most of the time when you travel anywhere (in this case EZ), you will see a group of dedicated young Muslims offer you everything that is theirs so that you may feel more comfortable..aand subhanAllah its one of the most beautiful things ever....and why shouldn't it be, its the sunnah of our beloved Messenger, Muhammad salalahualyahiwalsam...

but i think its times like these that we get a taste of true brotherhood...like sometimes i really think if i went up to a sister i met and complimented something shes wearing she'd just take it off and give it to me..subhanAllah thats what this deen is about...and it never fails to amaze me..

anyway shout out to everyone who hosted this years EZ...and inshaAllah may Allah subhana wa ta ala present us an opportunity to be as kind of hosts as they were to us..
ameeeeen.

wsalamualiakumwarahmatullah
beace in the middle east..

Shaadi post #2352346

2006-03-13T21:47:00.000-05:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

so my 13 year old cousin emailed me again in regards to my marriage prospects, and i was literally laughing at loud...keep in mind shes 13!

Asalaam Alykum,

.............(family stuff ill leave out)..............
Hafiz Ali is SINGLE!!! can u believe it....OMG, u dont know him, but OOOO r u into something good!!!! (LOL JK). SEND ur pic they asked for it a LONG time ago, but no one had ur recent pics. expcept ur baby pics which my mom wuz considering sending. "oh yea they can really tell how u look like now" JK lol. So send me some really STUNNING pictures ~which wont be hard 2 take ;) hehe. n INSHALLAH if things go well who knows maybe you'll get married dis summer IN HOUSTON....just da thought of it is getting me all excited.

A little of Info about him that i know of:
he's single (no duh, just needed 2 fill in da space)
HAFIZ
24-25 years old
is da son of a guy who owns like 2 halal restaurants (KFC :)
DRIVES a BEAMER lol <---4rm fahad
TALLER than U which should automatically make u say yes Just Kidding! like 6 feet
VERY RELIGIOUS background
has a goatee, squarish head lol, & nice hair <---Khasim Bhai would fall in luv w/him
****send some pics k?*****

w/lots of luv,
amerah

P.S.- im not trying 2 pressure u or anything, but think about!

lolllllllllllll...subhaaaaaaaaaaaaan'Allah ...

beace fil middle east ;)

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

EZ

2006-03-13T13:23:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

So i think i may have attended my last MSA conference ever...

Here are some things I have learned over this weekend:

1) I am OLD
2) I don't know how to drive without power steering
3) NYU brothers are the best...hands down mashaAllah...
4) I miss Maulana Kamal B I G T I M E ...
5) I am not as social as i thought i was
6) I have mad regional (state) pride
7) I am pickier than i thought i was (in regards to food)
8) Mubeen Husain is on crack and i love her for it--i knew this before but ...to what extent i just figured out :)
9) I love Philly/Jersey girls
10) ummm.....i love nasheeds..

So yea...how would i label the east zone conference? I don't know...either i am changing or the conferences are changing...maybe a combination of the two. I understand its super hard to organize these conferences, and its really really draining as most organizers go on absolutely no sleep. But some things i think are essential to any conference to keep the masses happy: 1- good food, 2- happy people, 3- lots of signs. I never realized how much logistics could really make or break a conference...but boy oh boy can it...

Also as much as I enjoyed hearing Brother Noman Ali khan ... i think there was a desperate need for more scholars...

Anyway inshaAllah im going to be going to the minarah program this weekend so inshaAllah ill have lots and lots of notes from that.

and no for everyone that is asking i did not find my husband at east zone.

beace in the middle east..
wassalamualaikumwarahmatullah

my mugga...

2006-03-06T01:24:00.000-05:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

On Friday i took my baby...mugalicious (maghrib) to the vet to get "fixed" (spayed). This was her first big operation type of thing, and i've been told its just one of those things you have to do.

So we brought maghrib home and unfortunately she has to wear one of those cone things on her head so she can't do any of the things she loves doing ie cleaning herself and running around and going psycho...

For most of the weekend i was in my apartment just sititng with her, and subhanAllah for perhaps the first time in my life i felt like .00000001 of what a mother probably feels. First and foremost its very obvious that my cats in pain...and wallahi when i looked at her like tears came in my eyes. First because I knew i was the cause of this pain, and second, as dumb as this sounds, she is my baby. Those of you guys that don't have pets may not understand. But i have this affection for her that i don't have for other people. Maybe, because like babies, cats are so dependent on their owners for love and affection and everything, and ofcourse cats like people can not speak, but she would just look at me and i kneeeeeeeew the pain she was in. So, subhanAllah i cant explain the feeling, but its a completely selfless, you just want to absorb the pain of the other being (in this case the cat) and take it upon yourself. I see my mom and whenever I have the slightest of pain, even if i just did something d umb like bang into the table, or fall down the stairs (yes i do that often) she would come and just sit with me and massage the area and get this look in her eyes. When im hurt she hurts.

So yes....please make dua for my cat :( she can't walk straight, she falls cuz that stupid cone messes up her balance, shes got pain...

take care..
wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

2006-02-24T01:04:00.000-05:00

Samish - i love u :)

"Just to re-inforce, as i said in one of my previous posts: Be nice to kids... they also are the Ummah of Rasulullah Sal'Allahualayhiwasalam, these kids will hold the banner of Islam after us.... May we and they be able to do so with Pride, Honor, Love and respect for Allah, His Mesenger Sal'Allahualayhiwasalam, and this Deen."-http://www.journeyends.blogspot.com/

ameen.

:)

Decisions decisions decisions ...

2006-02-24T00:24:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

Isn't it interesting how the smallest decisions can have lasting effects on your life?
I am graduating in a matter of months, and I can clearly remember myself just four years ago...
I was debating between NYU, Stony and St Johns...
each of these schools is located right here in NY, but I can't imagine how different life would have been
if i had chosen a different school...

Similarly today I had two places I had to be at a certain time, both located within the same building. One of these events, was a fundraiser type charity event with a bunch of stand-up comics, and the other a lecture with Shaykh Abdullah Adhami. I was sitting on the 10th floor eating dinner at the Comedy show when all of a sudden I just had a sudden urge to leave. The program had not even began, but something just didn't feel quite right so I took the elevator down two floors down and got there just as the Shaykh Abdullah event began.

As the Shaykh Abdullah event ended i thought about how Allah subhana wa ta ala protects us at times from certain things, and despite how much we plan how sometimes He allows our lives to take a different course. Perhaps from this different course your life will not change significantly but you will, along the way, pick up one or two things, whether they be gems of knowledge, glances and smiles from a stranger, or something completely different.

Sometimes things happen on a whim, and all of a sudden your life is changed... I think about all the times that I have by some chance avoided going to a certain place, only to later learn of events that had taken place that night, that even if I had tried to distance myself from at the time would have been virtually impossible to do so. But subhanAllah, at times Allah subhana wa ta ala removes us from this harm.

This leads to a whole different topic that I am constantly thinking about. Today I was talking to one of my friends and she subhanAllah said something so profound. She was mentioning something her husband had said to her about their relationship and she told me, "sometimes I wonder why Allah subhana wa ta ala is so good to me. What did i do to deserve this?" ... SubhanAllah I think if we begin to count the blessings in our life you really begin to question why ME? Why has Allah subhana wa ta ala chosen me to be Muslim? Why has He subhana wa ta ala granted me the company of so many righteous individuals? Why have I been granted the honor of being in the ummah of the most beloved of mankind, Muhammad salalahualayhi wa salam? What have I done to deserve any of these blessings?

And you realize, after all of these questions, that there is absolutely nothing that you could have done. It is out of his love and His mercy that He has chosen us to tread on this path of Islam.

Theres another dumb game that comes to mind that me and my friends always play: "what if we weren't Muslim".
SubhanAllah...if you really start to think about where you could have been its really really scary...and perhaps this isn't the best type of game to be playing, to try and guess what "could" have been. But what it does do, is make you realize how great of a blessing it is to simply just say that I am Muslim.

:)

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

2006-02-19T01:19:00.000-05:00

so i realized.... i have absolutely no control over my life...

subhanAllah.

Love Love and More Love...

2006-02-07T01:35:00.000-05:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

So almost every other post has to do with love, does it not? It's funny how so many of us think that we are in love with so many different individuals in our life. We wonder, what will come of this love? Will it solidify into a strong friendship? Will it lead to marriage? Many other times friends and family will mock our love, telling us that love is not just seeing a person once or twice, it is not based on the superficial, or that we don't understand love and are too naive.

That has lead me to think and think about what love is.

Ibn al Farid has said, "Surrender utterly, Love is no slight thing." So for what, or who would we really surrender utterly. This lead me to think and think and think. Of course one thinks of their parents and their family, and then the closest of friends, but Subhan'Allah there is an individual who in all his beauty and nobleness far exceeds any individual that has ever walked this earth, hearts that tried to contain or hide their love for him were unable to, and he, salalahualayhi wa salam is the most deserving of this love.

Many a times people have questioned what does loving someone entail. Today I actually had this discussion with one of my close friends. Once again we talked about love, what does it mean to love someone. Is love simply just a feeling that one has in their heart and keeps hidden and tucked away? Or is it something greater and deeper then that. I believe there are certain things that can not just be felt or experienced, some examples of these being knowledge, faith, and love. One can not just safeguard knowledge in their minds, leave it there and refuse to act on it. Knowledge is only knowledge in its truest form when it is practiced, or taught. If it is stored in one's memory, then what makes the knowledgeable different from the ignorant?

Similarly Allah subhana wa ta ala has said in the Quran, "Do men think they will be left alone on saying 'We believe' and that they will not be tested?" 29:2. Faith, like knowledge is not something that is tucked away, yet each and every day it is tested, in both major and minor forms. Those who persevere are those who have faith.

This brings us to love. Yes there are degrees of love, but what is the ultimate love? Is the ultimate love simply through the heart. Or is it through words, actions, and forms of expression....

Abu Hurayra said that the Messenger of Allah said, "Those in my community with the strongest love for me are the people who will come after me. Some of them would give their family and wealth to have seen me." (Muslim and al-Bukhari)

Subhan'Allah..........This is one of my favorite favorite favorite hadith. In this hadith, the Prophet salalhualayhi wa salam has elevated our status, us weak and frail Muslims that even if we tried could not compete with the Sahabah in their deeds, by stating that our love for him, salalahualayhi wa salam, is the strongest.

Sit back once again, and think...are we amongst those that the Prophet salalahualayhi wa salam has mentioned in this hadith. He, salalahualayhi wa salam, did not simply say those that love me are those that will come after me, yet he, salalahualayhi wa salam, followed it by that some of them would give their family and wealth to have seen me. This love, requires more then just an inkling of a feeling, it is expressed through sacrifice.

What are we doing on a daily basis to express our love for our Beloved (subhana wa ta ala)'s beloved, salalahualayhi wa salam?

I think about what is going around in the news, the images that are being drawn of our beloved Messenger salalahualayhi wa salam, and then I read about the comments that Muslims in this country are making. Comments like "oh its being blown out of proportion"....and I can't even begin to express how I feel. You know that sound of nails scratching a chalk board, its beyond that.

Tell me something, if someone who is more beloved to you then anyone that has ever existed, or will ever exist, is defamed openly in front of billions of people, would you just shrug it off? Then how does it not tear people up when the Prophet salalahualayhi wa salam's name is attached to an image so grotesque..........

Would you not sacrifice every ounce of your being to obtain his love, to sit in his presence for even a moment. How then would you tell him that you didn't even flinch when people insulted him such.

Are we really in that sad of a state that we are amongst those that make EXCUSES for those who propagate such acts.

How on the Day of Judgment will we ask him, Salalahualayhi wa salam, for his intercession when we could not even defend him with our lips?

Is our love really this weak?

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Back to square one...

2006-02-06T02:28:00.000-05:00

Back to square one ladies and gentlemen....

im getting kinda used to this ...

:)

My kitty cat Maghrib :)

2006-02-05T13:42:00.000-05:00

What is the matter with your heart?

2006-02-04T02:07:00.000-05:00

"What has happened to your eyes, (the more) you tell them to stop, the more they continue flowing.
What is the matter with your heart, (the more) you tell it to come to its senses, (the more it is distracted).
Does the lover think that his love can be concealed.
While his eyes are shedding tears and his heart is glowing.
Had it not been for the love, you would not have shed tears at the ruins (of your beloved).
Nor would you become restless at the remembrance of the cypress (tree) the high mountain.
How do you deny love after the testimony.
Borne against you by (such) reliable witnesses as your yours and your illness.
Love has ingrained two lines of fear, and withered your face.
On your cheeks like yellow rose and the reddish tree.
Yes! Thoughts of the beloved came to me at night and kept me awake.
And love transforms pleasure into pain.
O you who reproach me, regarding my love, excuse me.
From me to you if you do justice, you would not reproach me.
My state (of love) has been expressed to you, (now) my secret is no longer concealed.
From those who malign (me), nor is there (something to) check my agony.
You have sincerely advised me , I did not heed it.
For verily a lover is deaf to those who advise him.

...

I transgressed the sunnat of him (Nabi, Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam) who passed the night (in ibaadat).
Until his feet complained of injury due to being swollen.
And he tied and folded, on account of hunger, around hi stomach.
A stone beneath which is his delicate skin.
And high mountains of gold (tried to) tempt him.
Towards it, but he was (completely) disinclined due to his high courage.
His piety increased inspite of his need.
For verily need never prevails (overpowers) the infallible.
How can the necessities of such a noble personality incline him towards this world.
For had it not been for him this world would not have come out of non existence.
[verses 11- 18 are well known- always being recited, sometimes in jum’ah, also audio in naats, ]

Muhammad ( Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam) is the leader of both worlds and both creations (man and jinn).
And of both groups, Arabs and non Arabs.
Our Nabi, the one who commands (good), forbids (evil). There is non (parallel to him).
More truthful than him in saying "No" or "Yes".
He is (Allah’s) most beloved, whose intercession is hoped for.
For every fear (and distress) that is going to come (on the day) of agony (and fears).
He called (people) towards Allah, so those who cling to him.
Clinging to a rope which will never snap.
He transcends the Ambiyaa, physically and in (noble) character.
And (the other Ambiyaa) cannot come near his in knowledge and noble nature kindness.
They all obtained from Rasulullah (Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam)
(Like a) handful (of water) from the ocean or (a few) sips from continuous rains.
And they all stopped before him at their (assigned) limits.
(Either) of a point of knowledge or to gain one wisdom from (his) wisdom.
For he is the on e with whom, ended all outward and inward perfection.
And then the creator of all creation chose his as (His) most beloved.
He has no equal in his magnificence.
The jewel of (excellence) in him is indivisible.
Discard what the christians claim about their Nabi
Then decide and say what you wish in praise of him (Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam).
And attribute towards his personality whatever you wish of excellence.
And attribute to his dignified status as mush greatness as you wish.
For verily excellence of the Messenger of Allah has no (limits)
Bounds, that a speaker might (be able to ) express with his mouth.
If his miracles were proportionate (according ) to his rank, in greatness,
Then his name would have, when called out brought decaying bones back to life.
He did not try to (test) us with that which would confound our minds.
Out of keen interest (kindness) for us, neither were we suspicious 9about the truthfulness of his mission) nor were we confounded (by his doctrines).
His perfect inner nature made people helpless from comprehending, so it was not understood.
Those near and far, except according to their (helpless) imperfect understanding.
Like how the sun is seen by the eyes from far.
Verily small, yet hurts (dazzles) the eye (when you stare at it).
And can the reality of him be comprehended in this world.
A sleeping nation whose description of him are (like interpretations of) a dream.
So the extreme depth of (our) knowledge concerning him, is that he is a man.
And verily he is the best of all the creation of Allah.
Every miracle which all the Nabi’s showed.
Verily they have been derived from his NUR.
For verily he is the sun of virtue (and ) they (Ambiyaa) are its stars.
Which show their lights to people only in the dark.
Until when the sun rose his light spread.
Universally and gave life to all the nations.
How noble are the physical qualities of Nabi Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam, adorned with good character.
(Who) was vested with beauty and disguised by pleasant temperament.
(He) is like a blooming flower in its freshness and the full moon in splendour.
And the ocean in generosity and time its fearless courage.
Even when alone, it appears sue to his grandeur.
As though (he is) in the midst of a large army and its retinue.
It is like pearls well preserved in oysters.
From the two mines, of his speech and his smiles.
No perfume equals the dust (earth) which is touching his (Rasulullah Sallallahu Alayhi Wasallam’s mubarak ) body.
Glad tidings be to the person who smells it (the dust) and kisses it. "

Qasidah Burdah

My room, Google Earth and Afghanistan :)

2006-02-03T01:02:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

This post will be completely and utterly random...

So last night me and Miss Dora Lee were sitting in my bed and examining the huuuuuuge Afghanistan map I recently put up on my wall. Huh? A map of Afghanistan you may ask.....wellllllllll its true I am not Afghani, but I am taking a class on Afghanistan and the Professor recommended we put the map up on our walls to familiarize ourselves with the region...

lol so when I did put it up on my wall, me and Dora began to laugh because.......if the CIA were to pop in and give us a surprise visit this is what they would see : a wall with a HUGE map of Afghanistan, with many different places circled and starred (haha), surrounded by various pieces of Arabic calligraphy, books on "Terrorism", Palestine, Iran, Iraq (and now Afghanistan) sprawled on the floor, and in the bookshelf, accompanied by many Islamic texts in Arabic and English....not to mention that i am the President of the Islamic Center ......i like the way I am falsely convicting myself via blogspot :)

oh yea also above Dora's bed (who is Chinese) I put one of my calligraphy pieces I got from China, it says "even a smile is charity" in both Arabic and chinese, but ofcourse our CIA bretheran wouldn't know that and think that the only reason that a Chinese girl would be living with three brown Moslems would be cuz she's in on it too...

anyway we had a nice fun laugh..

the point to this was that we couldn't find a certain city and when googling didn't work Dora suggested that new Google Earth thing.....and so I typed in the city in Afghanistan and lo and behold there it was, a satellite picture of the town, so i zoomed in further and further and futher and sure enough it was there crystal clear....maaaaad scary ...subhanAllah....
the even funnier part was that afterwards I tried my hometown in Long Island, and they hadn't gotten around to quite perfecting the image......weird na? The fact that every city, and town in Afghanistan was crystal clear via satelitte yet my town in the US of A was not.......yes i am a politics major, and yes i go to the most liberal school ever...lol.

Anyway its kind of amazing though google earth..check it out when u get a chance :)...

i think im done now :)

beace in the middle east

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah!

Let God deal with the things they do...

2006-02-01T01:30:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

There is something about the word HATE that i absolutely ...hate :), or rather strongly strongly dislike.

I think people fail to realize what the word means, and when Muslims use the word towards another Muslim my heart just literally feels like its been smashed to pieces.

Please let us not waste our time discussing our hatred towards one another, really honestly its just a BIG waste of time.

If i've realized anything it is that when you hate someone, it does absolutely nothing to that person, but in essence all it does is eat you up inside, and affect your imaan, and your well being.

So just leeeeeeeeeet it go, and "let God deal with the things they do, cuz hate in your heart will consume you too" (first person to name who said this gets a prize :)).

Honestly though, I don't think I can name one person whom I hate... and yes people name people like "Bush" or "Saddam" but honestly man I don't know these dudes. So for me to hate them would be quite the statement, yea I may hate some of their actions but HATE them, and their complete being, thats way too intense of a statement.

I bet tons of people hate me :) so please if you're reading this, how bout some mercy :)

Forgive, forgive, forgive, inshaAllah the more merciful we are to one another in this world, perhaps Allah subhana wa ta ala will be just as (and if not much much much much more) to us in this world, and more importantly the hereafter. How can we expect Allah subhana wa ta ala to shower us with his mercy, when we ourselves hoard it. So let it go, and inshaAllah you will get nothing but love in return.

(paraphrased) Anas ibn Malik says: Rasool (salalahualayhi wa salam) once advised me, "Oh my son, if you can do this, every morning and every evening, make sure you carry no hard feelings towards anyone. Oh my son this is my sunnah, (this is my way of life too). A person who loves me, loves my sunnah, and follows my sunnah, and he who loves me will be with me in Jannah."

What more can we ask for then to be amongst those that love the Prophet salalahualayhi wa salam, and his sunnah, and those who follow his sunnah, and most importantly those who yearn to be with him in the hearafter...so if not for anything do it for your love for Allah (subhana wa ta ala) and his most beloved Beloved, Muhammad al Mustafa salalahualayhi wa salam :).

May Allah subhana wa ta ala open our hearts and allow us to forgive those that have wronged us, may He allow those whom we have transgressed against to forgive us, and May He continually shower us with His Mercy and His Blessings, because without this we would be completely and utterly lost ...

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Love is in the air...

2006-01-30T18:55:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

Yes siree bob its true... love is most definately in the air. No no no, I am most definately not referring to myself. I am referring to the maidens around me, within the past month I have heard about a dozen engagements mashaAllah, and each day of things that can somewhat constitute to the preliminary stages of marriage.

Marriage, marriage, marriage. I guess when you turn 21 that is all people like to discuss with you. On my recent trip to Houston my 13 and 14 year old cousins were even trying to find me a suitable spouse. On Eid they even dragged me outside of the Masjid to meet what they thought to be a an amazing catch for me. He had the three "H's" that would make any Muslimah pleased, Height, Hafidh, and Handful (fistful but i had to make it work with the H) beard :). However I was apparently too slow in putting on my shoes because by the time I got outside he had departed (thank God).

When my older cousin came to visit me this weekend she asked if anything "was wrong" with me because unlike my peers I somehow missed the marriage boat. At times this really starts to worry me, maybe I have become really really old, but dude, I'm 21! True my mother already had a two-year old at my age, but still...how can I compete with the most perfect of women :)

So anyway, yes its true love is in the air. But there is absolutely no need for it to suffocate those that have not yet fell to its feet (ie me). :) So until then yo, I'm chiiiiillliiiiiiiiinnn ;) And for those of you that have found that special someone, May Allah subhana wa ta ala increase your love for one another, and make you the coolness and delight of one another's eyes (and heart) :)

wassalamualaikum wa rahmamtullah.

**EDIT** apparently there are a lot more "H's" - handsome, humble, and....Hyderabadi ;)

Sunny days sweeping the clouds away...

2006-01-30T11:02:00.000-05:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

SubhanAllah dude, what is with this weather? Its the end of January, arguably the coldest days of the year in NY, however it is 56 degrees today...56!

Anyway my class is starting, allow the good weather get to you ;)

wassalamualaikumwarahmatullah

sometimes you just want to dissapear

2006-01-26T00:33:00.000-05:00

Sometimes you just want to dissapear.

Not because there is anything evidently wrong with this world or anything,
but just because its that ease you get when everything around you just evaporates.

SubhanAllah, i love the world. I love the people within this world, but sometimes
you just end up getting so distracted, you totally lose course, and you're like wait a minute
just what was i doing?

At this moment you take one step back, two steps back, and everything seems to clear up, so
you keep taking steps back, and its like this whole new landscape.

So what does this all mean? SubhanAllah i've been trying to find the balance
between these totally polar opposite feelings. Kinda between that one feeling where you just want
to be in solitude and the one where you just want to be immersed in people's company.

Evverytime I sit down and really start to think about this stuff I just think about the grave.
I just can't it out of my mind. The fact that we'll be in the dark dark ground by ourselves...perhaps
suffocating....perhaps being tortured...its scary. This is a reality we can't really escape either. Many people have tried to rationalize the hellfire to me, and told me you know InshaAllah we won't be amongst those
of the fire...but what about the grave? Everyone will get squeezed, just a little. I happen to be one of
the most claustraphobic people ever...so I don't quite know how i'll manage.

I don't know where this is coming from honestly. I guess I should try and focus on happy thoughts...

salaams yo.

Tomorrow Never comes..

2006-01-23T15:57:00.000-05:00

Relying upon the promise of "tomorrow,"
many people have wandered around that door,
but that tomorrow never comes.

-Rumi

2006-01-23T15:49:00.000-05:00

Why should i grieve because of a throne? Once it had made laughter known to me. Whatever you lost through the stroke of destiny, know it was to save you from adversity. One small affliction keeps off greater afflictions; one small loss prevents greater losses - Rumi

2006-01-23T15:38:00.000-05:00

Who responds to the distressed when they cry out to Him and who removes their affliction? Did he not make you inheritors of the earth? Could there be another God beside Allah? Little do you reflect.

Is it not He who guides you in the darkness of the land and the sea and sends the winds as heralds of mercy? Then is there another God besides Allah? Exalted be Allah above all they associate with him" - (The Quran 27:62-63)

Rejoice..

2006-01-23T15:32:00.000-05:00

I am a bridge across the ocean for my devotee,
but became a dragon for the Pharaoh.
Rejoice, O lovers, entreat God.
The same door has been opened again.
The fruit is beckoning, "Eat of me."
The water of life is inviting, "Drink of me.

-Rumi

Letting go...

2006-01-19T01:30:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

So... have you ever given up something you really loved? Whether it be a peice of clothing, a sentimental object, or even in some cases a person...do you know that feeling you get inside...

its not complete happiness...but its something else.

its that feeling of losing something thats so so dear to you, but at the same time its giving it away to someone you care deeply about.

that feeling is bittersweet.

subhanAllah....

it never ceases to amaze me...and by it I mean the Qadr and will of Allah subhana wa ta ala.

These actions that we commit, such as givng away things that are really dear to us to someone who is very dear to us, definately takes something away from us, and that something is a bit of our self, and a bit of our nafs.

But in the end what happens? Your heart lets go...

it lets go....

and where does it go?

Obviously when the heart lets go of something, it grabs hold to something else to fill that void, and subhanAllah it returns to Allah subhana wa ta ala.

Every time I have witnessed this happen in my own life, letting go of things has done nothing but bring me closer to Allah subhana wa ta ala.

It's completely amazing, how you have to take that step and one by one let go of things, things that may not necessarily be detrimental to you, but things that perhaps you have grown so attached to that your heart is unwilling to part with them. Later do you realize what significance these items play on our heart when you let them go.

It makes you want to let go of the world and everything in it, and just abandon it for Him and only Him. Because the feeling you get when you have become closer to Him and only Him is beyond words...

subhanAllah.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

When bad things happen to good people...

2006-01-12T21:45:00.000-05:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

this post is comin to you from the dirty south...Houston, TX.

So a lot has gone down in the past couple of days, my grandmother passed away, and I ended up here.

I knew my grandmother pretty well since I was very young, though in recent years I haven't seen her all that often.

So it came to me as a shock because she was perfectly healthy when she left this world, it was a simple heart attack that took her away from us.

Sooo when i heard the news i was surprised, and it didn't really hit me. The calls started coming and I didn't really know what to say. Later that night I sat down by myself in a dimly lit room, and i just thought and thought and thought. For some reason the idea of death, the fact that someone is permanently leaving this world, is not the thought the scares me. Rather I began to think about a multitude of other things, such as the grave, and the day of judgement. The thought that the opportunity to save yourself all of a sudden ceases to exist, really really frightens me. It reminds me of something that my dad always tells me when im being lazy. He'll ask me to do something, and I'll say that "meh badmay/kal karloogy" (i'll do it later/tomorrow), and he says "kaal kabhi nahin aatha hai" (tomorrow never comes). Meaning the more and more you put something off (ie becoming religious) it will never actually come, and so many of us, myself included,m put off a lot of things, thinking that we'll have time to do them later, however at times this door gets slammed in our face...

back to my nanni (grandmother)...she had called my house a week or so prior to her death, she called to tell us she was going on hajj and asked us all to forgive her. She had prepared everything for hajj and contacted everybody however due to chance her visa was denied (she was in india)...she was grief stricken about this and kind of kept to herself during this time, increased her ibaadah and recitaton of the Quran. During this time many of my family members called her and told her 'theres always next year...' and to this she replied to them, 'i may have missed my chance to got o hajj, but now im goign to see Hashim saab (my grandfather who has also passed)." At the time no one really knew what she meant by this, and on the day of Arafat she woke up to pray tahajjud when she had a heart attack.

Subhan'Allah.

The funny part is after i came to texas i heard a lot of people talking about her death...some cryng...some blaming it on a certain circumstances, etc. Funny thing is...this is death...no one can escape it. It can come and take you at any time and any place, and at that time pointing a finger at someone will do you no good. You'll leave this world, by yourself, face the questions, by yourself, face the punishment, by yourself.

So..

this goes on to a whole different topic i was thikning about...and am constantly thinking about... my relationship with individuals around me. Their affects on me, etc. Its funny how many people enter our lives, one by one, and how many leave one by one. So is it really worth it?

ill leave you with that..
and perhaps this will be continued...

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

(the title of this doesn't really pertain, i was going ot go in one direction but didn't...perhaps one day i will, and the title will actually be relevant....behrayhal....pleasse keep my nanni in your duas, as well as my family, and ofcourse......Me)

i miss school

2006-01-03T03:42:00.000-05:00

okay i lie..

maybe not school.

maybe just my roommates and friends.

in celebration of my missing my friends here is dora (my roommates) blog on why she loves me (and why you should too), which in essence is why i also love her, because we are two peas in a pod :):

i heart maheen and these are the reasons why:

- she's just as messy as i am so i don't look that messy, relatively
- she indulges me in wierdness like the sun dance to make sure that tomorrow is a sunny day
- we like being fake ghetto
- we like shopping
- it's two in the morning and we are still up an not doing anything except chatting
- we like to give ourselves applause
- we wake up late for class every morning and say, "i don't wanna go to school"
- because she's MAAAAAAAAAAAHHHHEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEEENNNNN FFFFAAAAAAARRRRRRRROOOOOOOOOOOOOOOQQQIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIII!!!

and i love her because she is misss doooooooraaaaa leeeeeeee..

i think i should be creative and add to her list ...

WHY I LOVE DORA LEE :

- we both shop online together, and encourage the habit...however at times we bookmark sites such as adiamondisforever.com and harrywinston.com :)

- we talk to muggy baby (our kitty) as if she is a real human being baby

- she hides cereal for me

- we both want to be housewives in 2 years and don't mind "wasting" our 160 k education...

- she eats at khyber pass with me (four days a week lol)

- she put up lights in the apt so i don't trip over our mess when i wake up for fajr

- shes down with all the muslim lingo

:)

jealous?

Don't worry if i love you enough i will put up a list on why i love you toooo :)

shaadi

2006-01-03T02:47:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

So one of my best friends got married yesterday in Pakistan :) She sent me an email this morning that completely made my day:

Hola, coma estas???
I havne't been able to check facebook yet, but i know you wrote me something nikah-related..............anyway, so yes, I'm officially maaaaaaaarrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrrriiiiiieeeeeeed!
Ah.
So yes, how was your new year??? We werent' even aware of it, because we were so busy with the tayyaarian that it was like, oh yeah, happy 2006.
Maheeeeeen, i miss you, sooooooooooo wish you had been here yesterday....keep me in your duas (i keep you in mine), let me know what you want from Pakistan, and inshaAllah i'll see you in about two weeks.
So much love, it's bursting out of my heart,
Assalaamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatuhu.

:) OFFICIALLY MARRIED :) subhanAllah...what a huge huge step that I don't think i've quite been able to fathom. So it seems one by one, each and every one of my friends seems to be biting the dust, and getting married :). So far its three but i know this is going to have a snowball effect and sooner then later, they'll all be maaaaaaaaarriiiiiiiiiieeeeddd.

So everyone says life changes after marriage, friends are no longer the numero uno priority in your life and they actually begin to fade into the background, actually for the first year or so everything seems to fade into the background, or so i am told.

thats pretty intense yo. First of all theres this dude that you have to spend the rest of your life with, and then he takes up the whole forefront of your life...

its interesting because i read somewhere, or heard somewhere, or something...that marriage is a contract granted by Allah subhana wa ta ala, it brings together two strangers, who before this event had no relationship what so ever to one another and gives them, arguably, the strongest relationship that exists in the dunya...intense no?

Here's the famous ayah that all of us have seen printed in every wedding invitation under the sun :

And among His Signs is this, that He created for you mates from among yourselves that you may dwell in tranquillity with them, and He has put love and mercy between your (hearts); verily in that are signs for those who reflect. [ Quran 30:21 ]

Okay completelly random tangent, last night one of these kids that i've grown up with, who in my eyes will always be four, but mashaAllah is now in 9th grade (which makes him what 14-15?) imed me, rather his brother (my childhood best friend) imed me first with the statement "my brother has questions about Islam"

So I'm thinking to myself "uh.....", quickly i run through some scenarios in my mind on what he could be asking me...often times i have had to answer questions from girls his age during MYNA, summer camps, Masjid, youth groups, and at this public school in my local town, so i knew the question could range in anything from gender relations to the halalness of a whopper...so after a solid four minutes im like, 'well inshaAllah i can try....."

seconds later he (who in my eyes is FOUR lol) posts this huge question :

ME: lol what are u doing awake
at 330

HIM: confusedd

ME: about?

HIM: okay, well, i have a problem, i dont know if its something major, but
me and my brother had a good 2 hour discussion on it

ME: wow
whats up

HIM: Islam Vs. Confucianism --my brother sided with believing in Islam only, I
sided with believing in Islam and other moral philosophies
(Confucianism)
okay, confucianism is ALL about respect/good will/moral
islam is too, correct?

ME: yea
so you have to understand that islam is complete, and it encompasses
all of these
all the good you find in other religions already exists within islam
whereas all the good that is in islam, is not usually found in other religions

HIM: yea
but like, before I make a decision, i think whether if Allah will
accept it, and if Confucianism will accept it. since i believe in
moral/good will/respect nowadays, i mainly credit confucianism for it,
not islam, because confucius states everything on respect, whereas
islam gives the major basics and some minor, so is it wrong to say I
believe in Confucian Philosophies, but not credit islam for it while
still following islam, butttt, the problem is that even though islam
and confucianism hold the same
philosophies, i credit me following those philosophies to confucius,
not islam, is that wrong?
like if someone were to say, "what are your moral philosophies on?" i
would say, "confucianism", not "islam"
thats wrong?

ME; well... islam is complete
you dont have to look else where
if you read
about the life of the Prophet saw
and i have this amazing book
with hadith
its called the shamail tirmidhi
if you read that
you will see
how complete islam is
due to the life of this one person
he respected everyone
slaves, women, old, young, rich, poor
and not many people can attest to that
also confucianism is not complete
and that is its biggest flaw
it tells you to eb nice to your parents
but does it tell you how?
or why?

HIM: no, not really

ME: exactlyu
but we, in our hadith
we have all of these examples

HIM: i see

ME: today
ask anyone
about any aspect of the Prophet saw's life
theyll know it
they can tell you how he ate, how he sat, how he talked, how he
walked, how he even went to the bathroom
no one can tell yhou this abut confucian
and this is becacuse
of the respect that he had of everyone
because of his morality to all of mankind

HIM: but like, if u look at it now, more ppl are affected by confucius's
words that islam holds than what islam says on what confucius says.
like, i read that 98% of japanese in japan cant turn down requests
cause of confucianism, but in somewhere in the middle east, anyone can
be rude

ME: no way
go up to
any muslim
anywhere in the world
without knowing them
and say salaam to them
what will they do
they'll say wa alaikum assalam
and think about those words
what do they mean
they mean 'peace be upon you'

HIM: but do they meann it?

ME: so in essence when ever u come in contact with a muslim
they are wishing peace upon you

HIM: but their intention can be different

ME: its not up to us to measure intentions
no one will know whats in anyones heart
but
Allah go to any person who follows confucious
u say he had sucha good moral code right
were there poor people in his society?

HIM;yaaa

ME: ofcourse there wer
look at the rasool saw
and his example with
with umar, he was so just, under the rule of islam, that they went out to give
the zakat to a poor person
and they could nto find one poor person in the entire empire
that empire stretched from
north africa
to persia

HIM: ooooo
ME:thats MUCh bigger then japan
and this is morality
morality as in practie
not just in saying
this is what islam is
i see
its not just about being nice to someone
its practicing it
with our wealth, with our tongue
with our actions

HIM: okay, im afraid that i start to look for confucianism for answers of
right and wrong than islam, howw do i change that? i want that change
fast and quick before i keep getting gunnah
3:35 AM

ME: read about confucianism
but also know this
that before the Prophet salalahualayhi wa salam
there were thousands of prophets
not just those that were named in the Quran
so Allah knows best, but confucious could have been a prophet

i can guarantee you any good that you find in confucianism is in islam
so if u want to study confucianism go ahead, but also take the time to
look into islam,and you will see that islam has this and more

i can give you books if you want as well

HIM: thats the thinngg, is it wrong to credit confucius for the motivation
of my good willl and decision-making?

ME: thank Allah
who created confucious

HIM: and think of what is Allah would think alongside of what confucius would say?
no no
theres ntohing wrong

HIM: lol, but, thats that im confused on -- thanking confucious for my good
will or Allah

ME: thank Allah
Allah created you
and him
and everyone
he guides people

HIM: but in general
do u think its wrong?

ME: as long as you are doing good
know it is from Allah
and i think that its okay for you to think this way
but i think it also shows you
that you should read more

HIM: cause before i decide, i think if confucius would accept it and Allah

ME: about the Prophet saw
because you will realize
he had a far greater moral system
then confucian
ill get you some books if you want
think about it this way
the prophet lived in a time when everyone around him

HIM: sounds good, lol, and im willing to read books on it

ME: worshipped idols
buried baby girls alive
did all these jahil things
and because of ONE man
they ALL changed
all of saudi arabia
and beyond

HIM: but confucius lived before the prophet (saw), and he had no say on God(s)

ME: yea but
are his repercussions as great?
no way..

HIM: nopee

ME: so you have to think about
WHY,
WHY did these people love this man so much
why did Musab give up all his wealth to go and follow this man
and when you go
and read about Muhammad, peace be upon him
you'll realize
i'll give you some books

HIM: OMG ur soo right, musab gave up his wealth for islam!! no one did that
for confucianism1

ME: musab gave up his LIFE for islam
not just his wealth

Anyway ...that was the jist of the conversation...subhanAllah i was amazed at the thought process of this 'kid', and he kind of caught me off guard at three in the morning...if any of you guys can think of anything else that i may have left out be sure to let me know inshaAllah.

I had a point with putting this conversation up here..
i think it was relationships....and how the Prophet salalahualalyhi wa salam set the benchmark for every relationship we are to have, including marriage....

subhanAllah imaaaaaaaagine having a blessed marriage such as that of the Rasool salalahualayhi wa salam's and Khadija (ra) or Aaisha (ra)...

anyway i think im losing my thought processes lol so i'll edit this later or something..
until then
duas
duas
duas ...

:)

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

ps--samish see not ALL my posts are psycho girl posts :) okay maybe all minus one ;)

istikhara

2005-12-17T03:34:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

So i am still sitting on my janemaaz (prayer mat), I just made two rakat salatul istikhara....

WHEN SEEKING GUIDANCE IN DECISION-MAKING (SALATUL-ISTIKHARAH)
Allahomma inni astakheeroka bi'ilmik. Wa'astaqdiroka biqodratik. Wa'as'aloka min fadlikal-'azeem. Fa'innaka taqdiru wala aqdir. Wata'lamo wala-a'lam. Wa'anta-allamul ghuyoob.
Allahumma in kunta ta'lamu anna [Hathal-Amra] khayul-lee fi deenee wama'ashi wa'ajila amri wa'ajilah, faqdorho lee, wayassirho lee, thomma-barik lee fih.
Wa'in konta ta'lamo anna [Hathal-Amra] sharrul-lee fi deenee. Wama'ashi. Wa'ajila amri. Wa'ajilaho. Fasrifho 'annee. Wasrifnee 'anh. Waqdur leyal-khayr haytho kan. Thomma ardini Bih.

O Allah! I seek your guidance (in making a choice) by virtue of Your knowledge, and I seek ability by virtue of Your power, and I ask You of Your great bounty. You have power, I have none. And you know, I know not. You are the knower of hiddent things.
O Allah! If in your knowledge, (this matter) is good for my religion, my livelihood and my affairs; immediate and in the future, then ordain it for me, make it easy for me, and bless it for me. And if in Your knowledge, (this matter) is bad for my religion, my livelihood and my affairs; immediate and in the distant, then turn it away from me, and turn me away from it. And ordain for me the good wherever it be and make me pleased with it.

SubhanAllah subhanAllah subhanAllah this dua is.........amazing.
The first time I made the dua tonight i read it in arabic, ofcourse my arabic is poor, because I am a struggling student, and will probably always continue to struggle :(, but the second time............and the third....i read it in the translation and.........as i was reading it the tears just began to flow, to the point where i had to pause. HOW great is this dua...like i cant even enumerate. First of all when you come and pray this, you're in such a state of helplessness, you know that everything you know is soooo incomplete, and you are beseeching the most complete, the most perfect, the most exalted...and that in itself humbles you....and then Allah subhana wa ta ala allows US to not only ask of him for help in making a decision, he does it in the MOST beautiful of ways....."make it easy for me, and bless it for me", and if it is not meant for me then "turn it away from me, and me away from it. And ordain for me the good wherever it be and MAKE ME PLEASED WITH IT".

ya Rabbil Alameen...............in this dua you ask Allah subhana wa ta ala to make you happy, how simple is that concept, yet how simply profound is it. At this point i couldnt really handle much, and my kitten was sleeping on my bed. She got off of the bed and climbed into my lap and began rubbing her face along my hands....it was subhanAllah amazing. I ask Allah subhana wa ta ala for pleasure in the midst of the night.....when absolutely no one in my home is awake or can hear me....if some one were to awake id probably wipe my tears and climb into bed. Yet here comes a choti munni si jaan, my kitten, and provides me with the affection i needed.

this probably makes absolutely no sense...but i am in complete and utter awe, once again at His Greatness...
Subhan'Allah.

Subhan'Allah.

Subhan'Allah.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

Life

2005-12-15T02:19:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

It's funny how at one moment in time you begin to think that your life is soooo utterly complex, and all you want is to escape from everything all at once, yet at other times, your heart is so complacent and at rest with the present that its unwilling to move forward.

What is even more amazing is when these feelings occur back to back.

Perhaps it is just a simple part of life, a simple element of the duality within ourselves... The nafs that is never happy with what it is given, and the heart that relishes the beauty in the simplicity of life and happiness.

Hm....

You know when I enter these "..." I actually do stop typing and think for a moment or two.... so the ... kind of allow you to flow with my thoughts....weird na? :)

Behrayhal what Im trying to say is that life is amazing, we in our indecisiveness are so....whats the word ...feeble. Both of these states, I believe, yearn for Allah subhana wa ta ala. At times you are soo amazed with His blessings and His signs that you are just dumbfounded and don't want to depart from that single moment.

Whereas at other points in your life, you may be so distant from Allah subhana wa ta ala, caught up in the now, that you allow other things to occupy your time, your mind, and your heart. So what happens? Obviously you find no satisfaction, you're tearing up inside because you know whatever is going on is not goin on right at all, and what do you do? You yearn for Him and only Him ...

Moral of the story? I don't know, I am not that profound that I can find a moral through my ranting and raving :)

I want to shout out to one of the two people that ever read this :: I <3 you samiya :)

Duas.......

beace.

thoughts

2005-12-09T02:03:00.000-05:00

So im back...

you know when there are two posts in one night...something must utterly be wrong, haha.

I've been told that most of my blog sounds like some psychotic depressed girl....and i guess that is what happens...who wants to sit in front of a computer during their happiest of hours..most certainly not me :)

So certain thoughts have been plaguing my mind since as far back as i can think (no not really that long, i just like to be semi-dramatic at times). The concept of "good" has been so morphed within my mind. Every time i sit back and do some self anaylyzing i realize how much i've changed. I don't even know when i began changing, or maybe i just never stopped changing. i guess its been an ongoing process...but then how come when i look back now i seem so ....different?

[This is probably as vague as vague gets, but im not a COMPLETE fan of putting every ounce of my heart and soul out on the world wide web for every Joe, Jack, and Mary to read, so i'll continue to be very vague, and if you know me, you are probably catching on just about now anyway.]

Change is good people say, and i agree, change can be amazing, But what happens when people around you, start looking at you with one eyebrow raised. Then what. Are you doing something completely and utterly out of line? Have you changed? Have they changed? What happens when the lines between good and bad become blurred.....that before you know it, at one point u were here in "good" and then all of a sudden you are amidst "bad". It is said that experience is one of the best teachers, then what if, despite what everyone says, your experience and your gut instincts tell you what you're doing is a-okay.

Whoa....reading that I am starting to confuse even myself. SubhanAllah when i stop and really think about everything I've just written, I think certain things most definately become prevalent. The human heart and mind, are so ....feeble. Judgement can so easily be changed on a whim. It really makes you realize how weak you really are, and how much you really rely on individuals and beings greater then yourself. Perhaps when people look at you with one raised eyebrow you should be concerned. When you start making excuses for things that were so simple and clear, perhaps your judgement is clouded, or rather, blinded.

Its amazing the amount of emphasis that is placed on reason in this society. But most times I find that reason only gets me in more trouble. Hah. I'm all about the heart. When somethings wrong you feel it, first and foremost, in your heart. After a while your brain can begin to reason just about anything.

SubhanAllah i apologize for the lack of coherance in this writing ..

beace.
wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Night

2005-12-09T01:36:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

As you can see this blog does not get updated all that often. However at times, often times in the midst of the darkness of the night you suddenly feel really really alone and the urge to reach out to something or someone. Amazing isn't it, that this is the time that Allah subhana wa ta ala descends to the lowest of the heavens simply so we can reach out to him.

Hmmmmmmmmm................

As I write this I have surah rahman playing in the background, yet in the background of that I hear the city life outside of my apartment. Unfortunately I live next door to a "pub", and every Thursday night, I hear people, at this very hour, screaming out things, things that they won't remember the next morning. Its weird isn't it.

Day and night are so utterly different...we can be one person in the day, and somehow transform into a totally different person at night. Today I was surrounded by sooooo many people, we sat, we laughed, we ate, we prayed, and then just as maghrib rolled by we all parted our own ways...and now here I am in the middle of the night sitting in my bed, only the light of my laptop illuminating the room. Goes to tell you something I guess, at this hour when I could be with the highest of companions, I choose my laptop ... they say in the midst of the night individuals call out to their beloved ... so i guess this white MAC would be mine .. eek.

subhanAllah ...

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

State of my Heart

2005-10-08T12:33:00.000-04:00

I can only imagine what the scene is in Pakistan right now...

SubhanAllah it's amazing, I just now began to realize the severity of Hurricane Katrina, when another natural
disaster has come upon us. It is only now that I begin to realize that perhaps my heart has hardened or
become de sensitized to the suffering of others. My first reaction is always to worry about those that I
immediately know. in Katrina it was my family in Houston, and with this incident in Pakistan it is Maulana Kamal, Sobia Baji Hazratji, their families, and my own family. After my worries about that have alleviated, it is hard for me to hold on to
that feeling of anxiety and worry. Many times in my journalism classes I am taught that this is normal, and the
stories "closer to home" have to be sensationalized, while those not so close, can virtually be ignored, or left in
small ink. It kind of humiliates me to think that not only does his happen on a grand scale through the media,
and permeates the minds and hearts of those around me, but it disgusts me most to know that perhaps it
has paid its effect on me too :( I've tried to increase my dhikr and dua by asking Allah subhana wa ta ala to
soften my heart, but I still fear that I am amongst those that upon seeing the suffering of others, may for a
short time feel some sort of sadness, but after time forgets about the plight of others. I pray that I am not amongst those whose heart has hardened and fails to see the signs around her. I pray that I am not amongst those that forgets the suffering of humanity, and focuses, selfishly, only on herself.

May Allah subhaanahu wa ta 'aala forgive the souls of those who lost their lives and grant them the barakah of
Ramadan in their death and thereafter, and may He grant us all the wisdom to learn from this and the tawfiq to
act.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

My hero . . .

2005-08-04T11:58:00.000-04:00

(Taken from "Men Around the Messenger" by Khalid Muhammad Khalid)

::: MUS'AB IBN-UMAIR :::
The First Envoy of Islam

This man among the Companions of the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH), how good it is for us to start with him. He was the flower of the Quraish the most handsome and youthful! Historians and narrators describe him as "the most charming of the Makkans".

He was bom and brought up in wealth, and he grew up with its luxuries. Perhaps there was no boy in Makkah who was pampered by his parents like Musab Ibn 'Umair. This mirthful youth, caressed and pampered, the talk of the ladies of Makkah, the jewel of its clubs and assemblies: is it possible for him to be one of the legends of faith?

By Allah, how interesting a tale, the story of Mus'ab Ibn Umair or Mus'ab the Good, as he was nicknamed among the Muslims! He was one of those made by Islam and fostered by the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH).

But who was he? His story is a pride of all mankind. The youth heard one day what the people of Makkah had begun to hear about Muhammad the Truthful, that; Allah had sent him as bearer of glad tidings and a Warner to call them to the worship of Allah the One God. When Makkah slept and awoke there was no other talk but the Prophet Muhammad (PBUH) and his religion, and this spoiled boy was one of the most attentive listeners.That was because, although he was young, the flower of clubs and assemblies, the outward appearance of wisdom and common sense were among the traits of Mus'ab.

He heard that the Prophet (PBUH) and those who believed in him were meeting far away from the dignitaries and great men of the Quraish atAs-Safaa in the house of Al-Arqam Ibn Al-Arqam (Daar Al-Arqam). He wasted no time. He went one night to the Daar Al-Arqam, yearning and anxious. There/ the Prophet (PBUH) was meeting his Companions, reciting the Qur'aan to them and praying with them to Allah the Most Exalted. Mus'ab had hardly taken his seat and contemplated the verses of Qur'aan recited by the Prophet (PBUH) when his heart became the promised heart that night.

The pleasure almost flung him from his seat as he was filled with a wild ecstasy. But the Prophet (PBUH) patted his throbbing heart with his blessed right hand, and the silence of the ocean's depth filled his heart. In the twinkling of an eye, the youth who had just become Muslim appeared to have more wisdom than his age and a determination that would change the course of time!

Mus'ab's mother was Khunaas Bint Maalik, and people feared her almost to the point of terror because she possessed a strong personality. When Mus'ab became a Muslim, he was neither careful before nor afraid of anyone on the face of the earth except his mother. Even if Makkah, with all its idols, nobles, and deserts were to challenge him, he would stand up to it. As for a dispute with his mother, this was an impossible horror, so he thought quickly and decided to keep his Islam secret until Allah willed. He continued to frequent Daar Al-Arqam and take lessons from the Prophet (PBUH). He was satisfied with his faith and avoided the anger of his mother, who had no knowledge of his embracing Islam.

However, Makkah at that time kept no secret, for the eyes and ears of the Quraish were everywhere, very alert and checking every footprint in its hot sands. Once, "Uthmaan Ibn Talhah saw him steadily entering Al-Arqam's house, then he saw him a second time praying the prayer like Muhammad. No sooner had he seen him than he ran quickly with the news to Mus'ab's mother, who was astonished by it.

Mus.'ab stood before his mother, the people, and the nobles of Makkah who assembled around him, telling them the irrefutable truth and reciting the Qur'aan with which the Prophet (PBUH) cleansed their hearts and filled them with honour, wisdom, justice, and piety.

His mother aimed a heavy blow at him, but the hand which was meant as an arrow soon succumbed to the powerful light which increased the radiance of his face with innocent glory because it demanded respect with its quiet confidence. However, his mother, under the pressure of her motherliness, spared him the beating and the pain, although it was within her power to avenge her gods whom he had abandoned. Instead she took him to a rough corner of her house and shut him in it. She put shackles on him and imprisoned him there until he heard the news of the emigration (hijrah) of some of the believers to Abyssinia. He thought to himself and was able to delude his mother and his guards, and so escaped to Abyssinia.

There he stayed in Abyssinia with his fellow emigrants and then returned with them to Makkah. He also emigrated to Abyssinia for the second time with the Companions whom the Prophet (PBUH) advised to emigrate and they obeyed. But whether Mus'ab was in Abyssinia or Makkah, the experience of his faith proclaimed itself in all places and at all times.

Mus'ab became confident that his life had become good enough to be offered as a sacrifice to the Supreme Originator and great Creator. He went out one dry t.'" some Muslims while they were sitting around the Prophet (PBUH); and no sooner did they see him than they lowered their heads and shed some tears because they saw him wearing worn-out garments. They were accustomed to his former appearance before he had become a Muslim, when his clothes had been like garden flowers, elegant and fragrant.

The Prophet (PBUH) saw him with the eyes of wisdom, thankful and loving, and his lips smiled gracefully as he said, "I saw Mus'ab here, and there was no youth in Makkah more petted by his parents than he. Then he abandoned all that for the love of Allah and His Prophet!"

His mother had withheld from him all the luxury he had been overwhelmed by, when she could not return him to her religion. She refused to let anyone who had abandoned their gods eat of her food, even if he was her son. Her last connection with him was when she tried to imprison him for a second time after his return from Abyssinia, and he swore that if she did that, he would kill all those who came to her aid to lock him up. She knew the truth of his determination when he was intent and decided to do something, and so she bade him goodbye weeping.

The parting moment revealed a strange adherence to infidelity on the part of his mother, and the greater adherence to faith on the part of her son. When she said to him, while turning him out of her house, "Go away, I am no longer your mother," he went close to her and said, "0 mother, I am advising you and my heart is with you, please bear witness that there is no god but Allah and that Muhammad is His servant and messenger." She replied to him, angrily raging, "By the stars, I will never enter your religion, to degrade my status and weaken my senses!"

So Mus'ab left the great luxury in which he had been living. He became satisfied with a hard life he had never seen before, wearing the roughest clothes, eating one day and going hungry another. This spirit, which was grounded in the strongest faith, adorned with the light of Allah, made him another man, one who appeals to the eyes of other great souls.

While he was in this state, the Prophet (PBUH) commissioned him with the greatest mission of his life, which was to be his envoy to Al-Madiinah. His mission was to instruct the Angaar who believed in the Prophet (PBUH) and had pledged their allegiance to him at qabah, to call others to Islam, and to prepare Al-Madiinah for the day of the great Hijrah. There were among the Companions of the Prophet (PBUH) at that time others who were older than Mus'ab and more prominent and nearer to the Prophet (PBUH) by family relations. But the Prophet (PBUH) chose Mus'ab the Good, knowing that he was entrusting to him the most important task of that time, putting into his hands the destiny of Islam at Al-Madinah. The radiant city of Al-Madiinah was destined to be the home of Hijrah, the springboard of Islamic preachers and the liberators of the future.

Mus'ab was equal to the task and trust which Allah had given him and he was equipped with an excellent mind and noble character. He won the hearts of the Madinites with his piety, uprightness and sincerity. And so they embraced the religion of Allah in flocks. At the time the Prophet (PBUH) sent him there, only twelve Muslims had pledged allegiance to the Prophet (PBUH) at the Pledge of 'Aqabah. He had hardly completed a few months when they answered to the call of Allah and the Prophet (PBUH). During the next pilgrimage season, the Madinite Muslims sent a delegation of 70 believing men and women to Makkah to meet the Prophet (PBUH).They came with their teacher and their Prophet's envoy, Mus'ab Ibn'Umair. Musab had proven, by his good sense and excellence, that the Prophet (PBUH) knew well how to choose his envoys and teachers.

Mus'ab had understood his mission well. He knew that he was a caller to Allah and preacher of His religion, which calls people to right guidance and the straight path. Like the Prophet (PBUH) in whom he believed/ he was no more than a deliverer of the message. There he stood fast, with As'd Ibn Zoraarah as host, and both of them used to visit the tribes, dwellings, and assemblies, reciting to the people what he had of the Book of Allah, instilling in them that Allah is no more than One God.

He had confronted certain instances, which could have put an end to his life and that of those with him but for his active, intelligent, great mind. One day, he was taken by surprise while preaching to the people to find Usaid Ibn Hud.air, leader of the 'Abd Al-Ashhal tribe, at Al-Madinah confronting him with a drawn arrow.

He was raging with anger and animosity against the one who had come to corrupt the religion of his people by telling them to abandon their gods and talking to them about the idea of only One God Whom they did not know before and had never heard of. Their gods were to them the center of their worship. Whenever any of them needed them, he knew their places. They would invoke them for help. That was how they thought and imagined!

As for the God of Muhammad, to whom this envoy was calling, nobody knew His place, nor could anybody see Him! When the Muslims who were sitting around Mus'ab, saw Usaid Ibn Hudair advancing in his unbridled anger, they were frightened, but Mus'ab the Good stood firm. Usaid stood before him and As'ad Ibn Zoraarah shouting, "What brought you here? Are you coming to corrupt our faith? Go away if you wish to be saved !"

And like the calmness of the sea and its force, Mus'ab started his fine speech saying, "Won't you sit down and listen? If you like our cause, you can accept; and if you dislike it, we will spare you of what you hate."

Allah is the Greatest! How grand an opening whose ending would be pleasant! Usaid was a thoughtful and clever man, and here he saw Mus'ab inviting him to listen and no more, If he was convinced he would accept it, and if he was not convince, then Mus'ab would leave his neighbourhood and his clan, and move to another neighbourhood without har, nor being harmed. There and then Usaid answered him saying/ "Well, that is fair," and he dropped his arrow to the ground and sat down listening.

Mus'ab had hardly read the Qur'aan, explaining the mission with which Muhammad Ibn 'Abd Allah (PBUH) came, when the conscience of Usaid began to clear and brighten and change with the effectiveness of the words. He became overwhelmed by its beauty. When Mus'ab finished speaking, Usaid Ibn Hudair exclaimed to him and those with him/ "How beautiful is this speech, and how true! How can one enter this religion?" Mus'ab told him to purify his body and clothes and say, "I bear witness that there is no god but Allah."Usaid retired for some time and then returned pouring clean water on his head and standing there proclaiming, "I bear witness that there is no god but Allah, and that Muhammad is the Messenger of Allah."

The news spread like lightning and then Sa'd Ibn Mu'aadh came and listened to Mus'ab, and he was convinced and embraced Islam. Then came Sa'd Ibn 'Ubaadah.

There and then blessings came with their entering Islam. The people of Al-Madiinah came together asking one another, 'If Sa'd Ibn Mu'aadh and Sa'd Ibn 'Ubaadah have embraced Islam, what are we waiting for? Go straight to Mus'ab and believe. By Allah, he is calling us to the truth and the straight path!"

The first envoy of the Prophet (PBUH) succeeded without comparison. It was a success which he deserved and to which he was equal.

The days and years passed by. The Prophet (PBUH) and his Companions emigrated to Al-Madinah, and the Quraish were raging with envy and their ungodly pursuit after the pious worshippers. So the Battle of Badr took place, in which they were taught a lesson and lost their strong hold. After that they prepared themselves for revenge, and thus came the Battle of Uhud. The Muslims mobilized themselves, and the Prophet (PBUH) stood in their midst to sort out among their faithful faces and to choose one to bear the standard. He then called for Mus'ab the Good, and he advanced and carried the standard.

The terrible battle was raging, the fighting furious. The archers disregarded the orders of the Prophet (PBUH) by leaving their positions on the mountain when they saw the polytheists withdrawing as if defeated. But this act of theirs soon turned the victory of the Muslims to defeat. The Muslims were taken at unawares by the cavalry of the Quraish at the mountain top, and many Muslims were killed by the swords of the polytheists as a consequence.

When they saw the confusion and horror splitting the ranks of the Muslims, the polytheists concentrated on the Prophet of Allah to finish him off. Mus'ab saw the impending threat, so he raised the standard high, shouting, "Allahu Akbar! Allah is the Greatest!" like the roar of a lion. He turned and jumped left and right, fighting and killing the foe. All he wanted was to draw the attention of the enemy to himself in order to turn their attention away from the Prophet (PBUH). He thus became as a whole army in himself. Nay, Mus'ab went alone to fight as if he were an army of giants raising the standard in sanctity with one hand, striking with his sword with the other. But the enemies were multiplying on him. They wanted to step on his corpse so that they could find the Prophet (PBUH).

Let us allow a living witness to describe for us the last scene of Mus'ab the Great.

Ibn Sa'd said: Ibraahim Ibn Muhammad Ibn Sharhabiil Al-'Abdriy related from his fatherwho said: Mus'ab Ibn 'Umair carried the standard on the Day of Uhud. When the Muslims were scattered, he stood fast until he met Ibn Qumaah who was a knight. He struck him on his right hand and cut it off but Mus'ab said "" (3:144). He carried the standard with his left hand and leaned on it. He struck his left hand and cut it off and so he leaned on the standard and held it with his upper arms to his chest, all the while saying "". Then a third one struck him with his spear, and the spear went through him. Mus'ab fell and then the standard.

Nay the cream of martyrdom had fallen! He fell after he had struggled for the sake of Allah in the great battle of sacrifice and faith. He had thought that if he fell he would be a stepping stone to the death of the Prophet (PBUH) because he would be without defence and protection. But he put himself in harm's way for the sake of the Prophet (PBUH). Overpowered by his fear for and love of him he continued to say with every sword stroke that fell on him from the foe ""(3:144). This verse was revealed later, after he had spoken it.

After the bitter battle they found the corpse of the upright martyr lying with his face in the dust as if he feared to look while harm fell on the Prophet (PBUH). So he hid his face so that he would avoid the scene. Or perhaps, he was shy when he fell as a martyr, before making sure of the safety of the Prophet of Allah, and before serving to the very end, guarding and protecting him.Allah is with you, 0 Mus'ab ! What a great life story!

The Prophet (PBUH) and his Companions came to inspect the scene of the battle and bid farewell to its martyrs. Pausing at Mus'ab's body, many tears dripped from the Prophet's eyes.

Khabbaab Ibn Al-Arat narrated: We emigrated with the Prophet (PBUH) for Allah's cause, so our reward became due with Allah. Some of us passed away without enjoying anything in this life of his reward, and one of them was Mus'ab Ibn 'Umair, who was martyred on the Day of Uhud. He did not leave behind anything except a sheet of shredded woollen cloth. If we covered his head with it, his feet were uncovered, and if we covered his feet with it, his head was uncovered. The Prophet (PBUH) said to us, "Cover his head with it and put lemon grass over his feet."

Despite the deep, sad pain which the Prophet (PBUH) suffered over the loss of his uncle Hamzah and the mutilation of his corpse by the polytheists in a manner that drew tears from the Prophet (PBUH) and broke his heart; despite the fact that the field of battle was littered with the corpses of his Companions, all of whom represented the peak of truth, piety and enlightenment; despite all this, he stood at the corpse of his first envoy, bidding him farewell and weeping bitterly. Nay, the Prophet (PBUH) stood at the remains of Mus'ab Ibn 'Umair saying, while his eyes were flowing with tears, love and loyalty, "Among the believers are men who have been true to their covenant with Allah " (33:23).

Then he gave a sad look at the garment in which he was shrouded and said, "I saw you at Makkah, and there was not a more precious jewel, nor more distinguished one than you, and here you are bare-headed in a garment!" Then the Prophet (PBUH) looked at all the martyrs in the battlefield and said, "The Prophet of Allah witnesses that you are martyrs to Allah on the Day of Resurrection." Then he gathered his living Companions around him and said, "0 people, visit them, come to them, and salute them. By Allah, no Muslim will salute them but that they will salute him in return.

"Peace be on you, O Mus'ab. Peace be on you, O Martyrs. Peace and blessings of Allah be upon you!

Dirty nafs ...

2005-07-30T02:16:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

I guess you can assume this is a continuation of the last post...

For the past week or so I have been in the suburbs of Chicago, and subhan'Allah after just a couple of days here I have realized and actually somewhat materialized something that I have always known, I need to work on myself...hardcore.

Some time ago, last January to be exact, I had come to Chicago and had heard Shaykh Husain for the first time at his weekly dhikr session. That day he told us an example of a freshly painted wall. A couple of days prior to the dhikr session he had painted a wall in his house, after painting and purifying that wall, he said he would throughout the day find himself glancing at the wall to make sure no scuffs had appeared, and if even the smallest of spots had occured he would walk on over and try to remove it as soon as possible. He then went on to give an example of shoes. Being Muslim Masjid goers, I think many of us can relate to this example. Often times when you leave your shoes by the door near the Masjid on your way out when your attempting to find your shoes in the mass left by the door, you notice other shoes. Newer, cleaner, shinier shoes. Next to those shoes, the shoes you would have normally assumed to be perfectly fine seem old, and worn out. You only come this realization, however, when your shoes are directly placed next to these newer, nicer shoes. And as you're walking out the masjid you're like man I need to get new shoes, or atleast clean these up. He went on to relate the same deal with a dirty car parked next to a new one. You could be driving around aaaaaaaaaaallll day, but only when you park your car next this newly washed car do you really realize that your car needs a car wash :)

Moral of the story? Subhan'Allah our hearts are the sameeeeeeeeee way! You may thinkkkk that your heart and deen is in a perfectly okay state, until you are in the presence of the purest of pure hearts. All of a sudden you look down and start revaluating your own heart, perhaps its not as clean as you imagined it to be. Unlike shoes, we can't simply dispose of our hearts and purchase new ones. You then realize you need to seriously cleanse your heart, the dirt of the dunya and sin becomes so apparent that you can't stand one more moment with it. Subhan'Allah and all of our goals is to become that freshly painted wall. So clean, that even the slightest sin, or blemish will easily be detected and removed.

How does this relate to Chicago? Every single day I've been here I have been in the presence of the most amaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaazing people masha'Allah. I have had the opportunity to sit in study circles almost every day, and it has made me realize that I am in desperate need of a spiritual makeover so to speak :) But subhan'Allah just being in the presence of these individuals just makes my heart so content, my heart literally like reaches out to them and just wants to cling on for dear life, not wanting to return to its pathetic state...

May Allah subhana wa ta ala continue to fill our scholars with light, and may he forgive us for the sins we commit both openly and in private, sins that we commit knowingly, and unknowingly. May he forgive us of our past sins, our present sins, and the sins that we will commit in the future. May he forgive the sins of our parents, and may he purify our hearts and fill it with His Nur and His Love.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

departure...

2005-07-26T01:47:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

i dont feel like writing much...but someone said something so inspirational...

on the departure of someone very beloved to me :

me- have u ever been really attached to someone
for like the right reasonsS
- im straight up in love with these people
- like i jus find myself staring at her, like shes fillllled with noor n jus being in her
-presence u can feel ur life filling with noor
person x-nothings wrong with that..
me- like subhanA"lalh i cant even explan it
-but shes going away overseas
-its like tearing me up
person x-let try this.. imagine how much nur the Prophet (S) had, and imagine the nur and knowledge the ashab recieved by sitting in his presence, and when he passed away.. can u imagine THAT kind of depart?its just like ur example

this post will be continued...

tawbah...

2005-07-19T01:21:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

Subhan'Allah time after time, time after time, and yet again time after time I find myself stumbling upon the very same thing. Why despite everything we know, do we fall into error time after time? Over the same exact thing. We can feel ourselves at that moment beginning into the downfall, and each step away from this act is the most painful feeling ever, yet we know that it must be done. Somehow, somehow there seems to be a distinct war going on. The biggest war to have plagued the earth since the beginning of time. The war of a man against his nafs. Each and every day we have to fight ourselves, taking every ounce of strength out of our precious hearts to hold back. To not even begin in the direction, yet somehow, with the blink of an eye, we find ourselves at the same crossroads. It is only later, when the tears of tawbah have ingrained lines in our faces do we realize what this simple action does to our hearts, to our selves. How many more tears must be shed before the nafs loses? How many times will we turn our faces, our hands open in dua, our faces streaked with tears to our Lord, and how many times will he accept our repentance for the same ongoing sin? Are we heedless of the mercy of our Lord? Subhan'Allah how many times is it that we turn away beggers on the street. In one week I must pass by the same begger dozens of times, yet each and every day he asks me for money. True the first day I may give him a dollar, the next day a quarter, but when I see him still, unmoving in the same spot, I somehow lose faith in him and become frustrated him. If this man is so humiliated of his state, why then do I find him day after day in the same position? Why day after day does he ask me of the very same thing?

Why then, day after day, week after week, year after year, do I return to my Lord with the same sins? Why has not my humiliation burned so strongly inside of me, and embarassed me to the point where I dare not turn my sinful heart to my Lord in asking for repentance. It is true that Allah subhana wa ta ala in his might and glory is the Most Merciful, but why is my heart so weak that it can not fight the nafs that it has become all too familiar with.

May Allah subhana wa ta ala guide and protect us all...

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

Flashback II .......

2005-07-16T03:18:00.000-04:00

More on Makkah (from June '03):

Subhan’Allah, I looked up at the sky, the heavens above me, and the only thought that came to me, was just this, Glory be To Allah, the creator of the heavens and the earth. I looked up to witness a wonder that only He, subhana wa ta ala, could create. As the black sky turned to purple, pink, orange, and eventually blue, I could not help but feel amazed. My thoughts drifted as I heard the birds sing these same praises that I had just begun to take in, these birds followed the commandment of Allah as they too made tawaaf around His House, the Kabbah. Suddenly all of my senses were heightened, beneath me my feet touched the cool marble, and my hand was grasped by one of my best friends. As I was circling the Kabbah in my first tawaaf after Fajr during my first Umrah, I could not help but feel humbled. Here I was at the House of not only my Creator, but the Creator of the Universe, and I was blessed to be here with both my family and my best friend. Subhan’Allah what other journey could one take with such a close companion? I continued circling the Kabbah, repeating to myself, “Rabbana atayna fid dunya hassanatow wafil akhiratee hassanatow wakina azaabin-naar (Our Lord! grant us good in this world and the Hereafter and save us from the punishment of the fire)”. After completing the seventh round around the Kabbah standing in front of the doors to the Kabbah, the doors to the House of Allah, the doors to my mercy, I offered two rakat. As I was praying suddenly all of those wonders I had witnessed just moments ago, disappeared, suddenly no other thought crossed my mind. Before going to the Makkah I had made a list of things I would make dua for, but suddenly everything seemed so trivial. Here I was, facing the doors to the House of my Lord, my body was numb and still, yet a part of me trembled, trembled like it had never trembled before, with each heartbeat I began to weep. For the first time I had tasted the sweetness of salah. Nothing else in the world could have distracted my prayer; I realized that during this moment, the only connection I had was with my Lord. My sujood was no longer seconds long, but lasted for minutes. Here I was, I could ask for anything in the world, but what did I ask my lord for? His mercy. Knowledge. Patience. After completing my salah, I jus sat in front of the Kabbah, offering the only thing I could to Allah, my tears.

Days passed, and eventually I returned home, and though that June morning was still in my heart, it was never repeated. As much as I would try, I felt I could never re-create that moment. I assumed that the only way to get that kind of connection with Allah subhana wa ta ala was only possible at the Kabbah. Months passed, and the eve of Ramadan was upon me. As I was sitting in my brother-in-law’s kitchen making preparations for my sister’s upcoming wedding, I was overwhelmed with sadness. Here I was preparing for such a happy and auspicious occasion surrounded by my family, yet there was this emptiness within me. Ramadan was upon me, how would I react? As I sat there completely removed, I heard a faint sound, surprised I followed the sound into a bedroom, the only occupant besides myself being the television. The channel on was playing the very first tarawih prayer in Makkah, and the voice I had heard, was none other then Imaam Shuraim’s. I sat in front of the television, and suddenly a sea of emotions came upon me. I could smell the marble floor of the Kabbah as he recited the Quran, and suddenly there I was back in front of the doors to the Kabbah. Once again the tears began to fall, and once again was my heart filled with light. Subhan’Allah, was once again the only thought that crossed my mind. Eventually the tarawih prayer was over, yet my heart still had not been satisfied with what it was given. As I shut off the television, I couldn’t help but miss Makkah even more. My belief that this connection with Allah subhana wa ta ala could only be achieved through this holy city was once again strengthened. Sadly, I returned to my apartment in New York City .

The next night, the second tarawih prayer was upon me, and this time I was determined to make it to the Masjid, though I knew it could not possibly have the same affect on me as the Prayer from the Kabbah. The salah began, and the thoughts that I had held within me for months, suddenly melted and disappeared. The Imaam began to recite, and once again my heart began to tremble. My heart reached out to something beyond myself, and anything in the room, it reached out to something so intangible, that I could not help but feel suffocated. Then and there, I realized that it is not a place or person, that creates your connection with Allah subhana wa ta ala, but it is the His words, His guidance, the Quran that feeds you His love, His mercy, His Greatness. The only way to return this love, this thankfulness, is through a personal action, your worship of him. In a lecture some time ago, I once heard a speaker state, “If you want to talk to Allah subhana wa ta ala pray salah, and if you want Allah subhana wa ta ala to talk to you read the Quran”. Subhan’Allah never, since the beginning of time as we know it, has there been a greater interaction, then one between the servant and His Lord.

"O Allah, I am Your slave and the son of your slaves. My fate is in Your hands. Your judgment upon me is Your command. I ask you by every name You have taken for Yourself, revealed in Your Book, taught any of your creation or taken unto Yourself in the realm of the unknown, to make the Quran the spring of my heart, the light of my breast, the banisher of my sadness and the reliever of my despondency. "

Salaam :)

2005-07-13T22:57:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa Rahmatullahi wa Barakatahu . . .

Have you ever sat and thought about the statement written above, Assalamualaikum. Each and every time we meet another Muslim we're supposed to greet them with this greeting, may peace, the mercy of Allah, and blessings be upon you. That's intense. Often times I run by people and quickly mumble out a salaam. These are the same people who often times I find harboring bad thoughts about, yet when I am in front of them I ask Allah to bestow peace, mercy, and blessings upon them.

I remember I was talking to someone who is absolutely amazing and she was telling me about a person who had spread some horrible horrible rumors about her. She said that she had not seen this person in many many years, yet throughout this period the hate for this person accumulated in this sister's heart. In essence it was hurting her ibaadah and her spirituality. She realized the only way she could really get over this was by making dua for her. So for years she continued to make dua for this person, despite every horrible act she had committed against her, and she felt herself letting go of this anger she felt towards this sister, and she eventually became very very sincere in her dua. A couple of years later she ended up coming face to face with this sister and she said that this person had completely transformed into another person. Though the person never apologized to the sister, the tension between the two sisters disappeared.

Now imagine, if we sincerely meant every salaam that we spread, how that may effect a person. In essence each salaam is a dua. Our hearts should be filled with nothing but love and mercy for other Muslims...perhaps then all this junk around the would dissappear :(

duaaaaaaaas...

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullahi wa barakatahu ...

Flashback....trip to makkah

2005-07-12T11:18:00.000-04:00

Taken from something i wrote bout 2 yrs ago...

Ok...its two thirty in the morning, and i think i'm goin to give this a try...i'm going to try and write a real entry summarizing my trip to Saudi Arabia :)After we got all our baggage and had finally hauled a taxi we were on our way to makkah, which is 1 hour from the airport in Jeddah. While we were driving we were all SO excited and nervous and just...happy :). As we were driving sunset came upon us and thus we had to stop to pray one of the five prayers that we pray daily, and subhan'Allah it was so amazing how everyone on the highway all of a sudden took an exit and entered the masjid (mosque) to pray. Within five minutes the once congested highway was deserted and everyone filled the houses of God to praise and glorify him, amazing, completely amazing. This is the first glimpse that i got of prayer in Saudi....ofcourse i pray here in america, but praying there is SO DIFFERENT. Here five times a day i have to "fit" prayer into my oh so busy schedule, there their days and lives revolve AROUND prayer :) Shows where our priorities are i guess...when we finally arrived in makkah my parents insisted that we drop off our stuff at the hotel before we visit the kabbah. so i hurried n threw my luggage into my room, and me n my mobeesha rushed to the kabbah. Mubeen has been has been to makkah 2 times before this trip, so this was nothing new to her, and I thank God that i was able to make the journey with her so that she could guide me and so we could share this great experience. So we ran into the kabbah n while we were doing so the call to prayer for the last prayer of the day was ringing through the city in the most beautiful voice, and shop owners, citizens, and tourists all dropped what they were doing and started to make their way to the masjid. As i was walking in been made me cover my eyes so that i could see the kabbah all at once, as my eyes were closed i felt this excitement that i don't think i've ever felt before...for as long as i can remember i have bowed my head to worship to God, and everytime i did so i bowed my head facing makkah--facing this house of God...and i didn't do this action alone, but over a billion muslims today, and many from the past have followed this same tradition. As i opened my eyes I prayed, and to my surprise tears did not well up in my eyes, but instead i jus stood there in complete and utter awe. All i could do was stare at the sight in front of me, everything was so quiet, the call to prayer had finished, and there the kabbah stood. Its just completely beyond words...As i stood there staring, being reminded that the prayer would start soon n that we should find a place to pray. So we went up to the second level of the masjid, n prayed near the balcony so we were facing the kabbah directly. As i stood to pray with all of the other muslims that had gathered from different areas of the world in this holy city, in this holy place, my heart felt rejuvinated...this was the message that the Prophet Muhammad had preached about so long ago, and here we were living out this same message so many years later, here we all stood testifying that there is no God, BUT God....though we were all from such different walks of life this one statement bonded us closer then any other blood bond could. Throughout my stay in Makkah and later Madinah, i contemplated about all those that came before me, the Prophets from Adam to Abraham, to Moses, to Jesus, and lastly to Muhammad (peace and blessings be upon them all), and their great companions that stood with them in times of hardship. These individuals were steadfast in their faith, and all preached one message, be true to God, the one true God. Everything else was secondary--even their families. This amazed me, and i thought about my own society, a society in which kids look up to fictious heroes such as spiderman and batman, while there were such amazing individuals in our past, individuals that have changed the world in their time and in ours, individuals whose message lives on. And the only way to celebrate the lives of these individuals is to practice and preach their message--the message that there is nothing in this world that could compare to the grace and glory of God, and he is the one true God, and only through worshipping him and knowing him can a heart feel at ease. Everything else is secondary......

this is the book....

2005-07-12T11:10:00.000-04:00

Alif Lam Mim. This is the Book; In it is guidance sure, without doubt, to those who fear Allah; who believe in the Unseen, are steadfast in prayer, and spend out of what We have provided for them; and who believe in the Revelation sent to thee, and sent before thy time, and (in their hearts) have the assurance of the Hereafter. They are on (true guidance), from their Lord, and it is these who will prosper. As to those who reject Faith, it is the same to them whether thou warn them or do not warn them; they will not believe. Allah hast set a seal on their hearts and on their hearing. And on thier eyes is a veil; Great is the penalty they (incur).

(Quran 2:1-7)

Allah's Nur :)

2005-07-08T00:54:00.000-04:00

Stolen (borrowed) once again this time from Veiled Knight...

Bismillahir'rahman'nir-rahim.

Allahumma sali'ala sayyiddina Muhammadin wa 'ala alay sayyiddina Muhammadin wa barik wa salim.

Subhan'Allah, a few days ago i was told something beautiful by a friend, (may Allah shower his Rahmah upon this person and their family) Anyways, so perhaps i should share:

When Allah created us, before we were sent down to this earth, we met Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala, and there we promised to obey Allah, becuase He Is our Lord, and at that time when we met Allah Azza Wa Jal, and we saw his Great and Incredible Nur, and upon seeing it, instantaneously we fell deeply in love with it. The we were sent down to earth, and since that moment, each and every person has been searching fro something, something to fill thier heart wiiht, because theres somewhat of a void, we feel like we are missing something, we are missing That Nur. So everytime we see something beautiful or great, we are taken back by it, we fall in love with it because reminds us of Allah's Nur, yet its only a small small small fragment of a reflection of His Great Nur, and since we were looking for it, we see a small small small fragment of it and instantly we fall in love with this object/being which holds/reflects this Nur. Many times we hold on soo tight, not wanting to let go; because we feel content with it. But we have to realize that this is only a small small small fragement of That Nur which we are searching for, That love we feel so deeply in. The 'REAL DEAL' is Allah Subhanahu wa ta'ala...so when we think of it like that, it just makes us want to strive more and more inshaa'Allah, for The Real and True Love we once fell into.

May Allah grant us all the hidaya to strive for a glance of His Nur.

Allahumma sali'ala sayyiddina Muhammadin wa 'ala alay sayyiddina Muhammadin wa barik wa salim. Rawdhina billahi Rabba wa bil islaami deena wa bi muhammadin nabiyaa, wa akhirud'duana anil'hamdulillahi rabbil'alameen. Walaikumasalam wa rahmatullah

Quran, Water, and the Sky :)

2005-07-07T02:28:00.000-04:00

Stolen (borrowed ? :)) from Sohaib :

Speaker: "There are three things that a Muslim can never get tired of in his entire life:

* Reading Quran
* Drinking Water
* Gazing at the Sky

.. a Muslim can never get tired of reading Quran for the Quran enlightens a being spiritually. In other words, its like a spiritual buzz. It gives a feeling of satisfaction, like no other. Second, drinking water. Thats a given. A human cannot survive without water, and even though it has no taste or color, its the most refreshing drink in the world. On top of that, most of our bodies and the world are composed of water. Finally.. looking at the sky. Any time of the day or night, you can look to the sky and find comfort and peace. It's beauty is at loss for words.."

All grown up... ?

2005-07-07T01:46:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

Its kind of amazing how time just fliiiiiiiiiiies by. I can recall when I was 4 years old and was surrounded by people my age (20) and I thought they were soooooo old...it was beyond me to even imagine what they did with their lives...and now here I am, subhan'Allah.

The funny thing is, despite being 20, I feel so...naive? What I percieve to be life is probably very sheltered and uni-dimensional (is that a word?), yet at my age countless other individuals have held the burden of families, nations, and societies on their backs. I remember at the MSA East Zone Conference this year Shaykh Husain spoke about the life of Fatima (ra) and how she was given the glad tidings of jannah and perfected herself at such a young age, probably even before the age that I am at now. Meaning she spent her days as a teenager, as what we would now call a child, in the service of Allah and His Messanger. Her life meant SOMETHING, and she achieved SOMETHING. May Allah subhana wa ta ala bless her and her family.

Subhan'Allah ... now to return to myself, sitting here in front of this laptop at 1:55 am, I am at a complete loss as to what I am and what I am to become. 20 years of my life have passed by, in what seems now as a blur, yet I am unsure that if today on this day I were to leave this world I would have anything substantial to account for. Still I wonder how many more years will go by before my time attains some sort of barakah...

May Allah subhana wa ta ala guide and protect us all...

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah

Love <3

2005-05-23T11:19:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa Rahmatullah,

Yesterday one of my friends and I were taking a walk and discussing various issues we were dealing with, and we landed on the issue of the heart, and subhan'Allah we started talking about the condition of the heart. Shaykh Zulfiqar says in Love for Allah,

"The human body is composed of limbs and organs, each with a unique trait seeing is the trait of the eye; listening is the trait of the ear; and smelling is the trait of the nose. Similarly, loving is the trait of the heart, the heart is always in love with someone."

Be it with a stone, God, or anyone else,

There comes not tranquility without loving.

The heart is the ocean of love; love is its act,

Guard it a thousand ways; it will still fall in love.

(http://tasawwuf.org/writings/love_allah/love_chapter1.pdf)

At that point in time we were not discussing our inherent love for Allah, but our love for other things and people, and subhan'Allah we discussed that no matter how hard you try, your heart is always inclined towards someone, and often times the brain and it's rationality are overshadowed by the heart and its love. It is amazing how many times we will abandon everything simply due to an inclination of the heart. However the greatest task is to focus the heart on the ultimate love, that of Allah subhana wa ta ala...

May I forget everything in Your remembrance,

And may I remember not anyone else.

May I forsake unto Thee all dear to my heart,

And may my heart be filled by You.

May I set fire to my joys and happiness,

And may my heart ache for Thee alone.

May I be blinded to all I know,

And may I turn only to Thee and none other.

http://tasawwuf.org/writings/love_allah/love_chapter1.pdf

Wassalamualaikum wa Rahmatullah.

Subhan'Allah- Some of my favorite hadith

2005-05-22T20:23:00.000-04:00

Allah will say to the inhabitants of Paradise: O inhabitants of Paradise! They will say: O our Lord, we present ourselves and are at Your pleasure, and goodness rests in Your hands. Then He will say: Are you contented? And they will say: And how should we not be contented, O Lord, when You have given to us that which You have given to no one else of Your creation? Then He will say: Would not like Me to give you something better than that? And they will say: O Lord and what thing is better than that? And He will say: I shall cause My favour to descend upon you and thereafter shall never be displeased with you.
- From the Forty Sacred Hadith. It was related by al-Bukhari (also by Muslim and at-Tirmidhi).

Subhan'Allah I don't think there can be a single thing more valuable in our lives then this favor...

Hadith Qudsi 24- If Allah has loved a servant [of His] He calls Gabriel (on whom be peace) and says: I love So-and-so, therefore love him. He (the Prophet pbuh) said: So Gabriel loves him. Then he (Gabriel) calls out in heaven, saying: Allah loves So-and-so, therefore love him. And the inhabitants of heaven love him. He (the Prophet pbuh) said: Then acceptance is established for him on earth. And if Allah has abhorred a servant [of His], He calls Gabriel and says: I abhor So-and-so, therefore abhor him. So Gabriel abhors him. Then Gabriel calls out to the inhabitants of heaven: Allah abhors So-and-so, therefore abhor him. He (the Prophet pbuh) said: So they abhor him, and abhorrence is established for him on earth.

Anas reports: A man asked the Prophet about the Hour (i.e. Day of Judgment) saying, "When will the Hour be?" The Prophet said, "What have you prepared for it?" The man said, "Nothing, except that I love Allah and His Apostle. " The Prophet said, "You will be with those whom you love." We had never been so glad as we were on hearing that saying of the Prophet (i.e., "You will be with those whom you love.") Therefore, I love the Prophet , Abu Bakr and 'Umar, and I hope that I will be with them because of my love for them though my deeds are not similar to theirs.

Abu Hurayra said that the Messenger of Allah said, "Those in my community with the strongest love for me are the people who will come after me. Some of them would give their family and wealth to have seen me." (Muslim and al-Bukhari)

It is related that once 'Abdullah ibn 'Umar's foot went numb. He was told, "Remember the most beloved of people to you and it will go away!" He shouted, "O Muhammad!" and the feeling returned.

Hadith Qudsi 36- The believers will gather together on the Day of Resurrection and will say: Should we not ask [someone] to intercede for us with our Lord? So they will come to Adam and will say: You are the Father of mankind; Allah created you with His hand He made His angels bow down to you and He taught you the names of everything, so intercede for us with you Lord so that He may give us relief form this place where we are. And he will say: I am not in a position [to do that] - and he will mention his wrongdoing and will feel ashamed and will say: Go to Noah, for he is the first messenger that Allah sent to the inhabitants of the earth. So they will come to him and he will say: I am not in a position [to do that] - and he will mention his having requested something of his Lord about which he had no [proper] knowledge (Quran Chapter 11 Verses 45-46), and he will feel ashamed and will say: Go to the Friend of the Merciful (Abraham). So they will come to him and he will say: I am not in a position [to do that]. Go to Moses, a servant to whom Allah talked and to whom He gave the Torah. So they will come to him and he will say: I am not in a position [to do that] - and he will mention the talking of a life other that for a life (Quran Chapter 28 Verses 15-16), and he will fell ashamed in the sight of his Lord and will say: Go to Jesus, Allah's servant and messenger, Allah's word and spirit. So they will come to him and he will say: I am not in a position [to do that]. Go to Muhammad (may the blessings and peace of Allah be upon him), a servant to whom Allah has forgiven all his wrongdoing, past and future. So they will come to me and I shall set forth to ask permission to come to my Lord, and permission will be given, and when I shall see my Lord I shall prostrate myself. He will leave me thus for such time as it pleases Him, and then it will be said [to me]: Raise your head. Ask and it will be granted. Speak and it will be heard. Intercede and your intercession will be accepted. So I shall raise my head and praise Him with a form of praise that He will teach me. Then I shall intercede and HE will set me a limit [as to the number of people], so I shall admit them into Paradise. Then I shall return to Him, and when I shall see my Lord [I shall bow down] as before. Then I shall intercede and He will set me a limit [as to the number of people]. So I shall admit them into Paradise. Then I shall return for a third time, then a fourth, and I shall say: There remains in Hell-fire only those whom the Quran has confined and who must be there for eternity. There shall come out of Hell-fire he who has said: There is no god but Allah and who has in his heart goodness weighing a barley-corn; then there shall come out of Hell-fire he who has said: There is no god but Allah and who has in his heart goodness weighing a grain of wheat; then there shall come out of Hell-fire he who has said: There is no god but Allah and who has in his heart goodness weighing an atom.

Subhan'Allah.

Allahumma sali'ala sayyiddina Muhammadin wa 'ala alay sayyiddina Muhammadin wa barik wa salim.

Becoming Closer to Allah :)

2005-05-22T17:44:00.000-04:00

Becoming Closer to Allah

Shaykh Dr. Nadeem Qureshi
cordially invites all brothers, sisters, & families…

Saturday, June 4th 2005
10:00am – 8:30pm

Talks Will Be Given By:

Hadrat Maulana Hafidh
Shaykh Zulfiqar Ahmad (db)

Shaykh Hafidh Sohail Irfan (db)
Shaykh Hafidh Imtiaz Ur-Rahman Thanvi (db)
Shaykh Kamaluddin Ahmed (db)
Shaykh Dr. Nadeem Qureshi (db)
Maulana Faqir Khokar (db)
Aalima Humera Ahmad (db)
Aalima Sobia Ahmed (db)

The Program Will Be Held At:

Islamic Center Of Long Island
835 Brush Hollow Road
Westbury, NY 11590

For more information please contact:
Shaykh Dr. Nadeem Qureshi 646-245-7650 Br. Anwer Billoo 516-747-1703
Shaykh Hafidh Sohail Irfan 845-371-0481 Br. Zia Ul-Haq 516-783-3645
Br. Fazlul Haq 516-783-7541 Sister Painda 516-996-4582
Br. Husain 631-974-1823 Br. Muhammad 516-353-8394
Email: aassny@gmail.com

[img]http://www.amirsahib.com/closer2allah.jpg[/img]

Confused face...

2005-05-22T01:00:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

So its one o'clock in the morning, and I have just returned from a friend's graduation party. I am currently seated at my friend's computer and am accompanied by yet another friend- Veiled knight (alhamdulilah :)). So...yes.

Anyway...we just got into a mini argument on how YOU aren't supposed to be reading this...YES YOU. This post is only for my veiled knight and certain other special individuals. I guess that kind of defeats the purpose of posting a blog online. lalalalalalala...

Yes, as you can see my brain does not quite follow anything that I begin upon, and my posts mean absolutely nothing.

Back to the original thought. Which I have forgotten but I will continue on yet another thought, countless countless other thoughts...I am actually quite ADD, and I may say that I will continue a thought and I never do. Apparently according to Veiled Knight I sound like a psychotic girl with a lot of problems, but the reason for that is that I usually only post when I am quite upset/psycho so I apologize if you really do think I am crazy.

Um...back to the original thought...or the modified original thought...
wait i've been told "shut up and end the post", I would do that, but then this would just be a useless post. Alas, most of my posts are useless...

Okay...anyway the point of the confused face is that I am confused. Not just about this post, though that is also true, but about life.

Confused?
Yes so am I :)

lol

forgive me, my friends have a very funny effect on me :) :) :)
Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

Navigation System

2005-05-15T16:11:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

Yesterday I spent the day reading Love for Allah (again), and listening to two talks by Shaykh Husain, Firmness on the Path and Blessings of Our Teachers, and I think that was the best spent time I have had in quite a while.

Subhan'Allah its funny how as human beings we need constant reminders of things that we may already know. Like its obvious that we should love Allah, that we should stay firm on one path, and that our teachers are absolutely amazing, yet subhan'Allah its within our nature to forget these things, and when we stumble upon these gems over and over again it is as if we learn it for the same time, time after time.

Sometimes when I am reading or listening to these amazing words, I tell myself that I will never ever forget the lesson I have learned, yet weeks later, here I am back in the same spot. It is kind of frustrating, and I guess the solution is to just become more regular in my schedule and learning, and, as Shaykh Husain says in Firmness on the Path, to stick to one aspect of learning (ie Arabic, Hadith, Tafsir) and get it down cold, and then move on, instead of jumping all over the place. Sigh, I guess thats what our teachers are there for, the navigation system for life :)

Allahu Alim.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.

Friends rock my world...

2005-04-14T23:36:00.000-04:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

So a lot has gone down in the past couple of days/weeks and its really been mentally, spiritually, and physically draining. In moments like these you kind of wish you were an ostrich and could just stick your head in the ground and everyone and everything will go away.....
but alas that is not reality, and we (sadly) are not big birds (though according to most of the brothers in my MSA i am THE "BIG BIRD") and we eventually have to deal with reality.

However i realized one absolutely amazing thing, you CAN NOT be depressed when you are in the company of the most beautiful people (and i jus dont mean superfically, though that is also true:) Subhan'Allah for the past couple of days I have spent countless hours with the most amazing girls in the whole world masha'Allah, i think i could sit and listen to each of them tell me their whole life story five times, and still not get bored.

but u know what STINKS, one is moving to paki-land for good, four are graduating, and one is an alumnus :( oh well they shall remain in my duas n heart forever n ever :)

peace.

food and marriage..

2005-04-06T21:40:00.000-04:00

assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah...

Today nadia, aqsa, maimuna and i sat around in the IC and talked about.....marriage and food....::GASP GASP::

lol true true...we do ALWAYS talk about the two topics...maybe 80 percent of the time we're together, but still, each and every time this conversation lasts for hours. I don't know what it is about marriage and food that can just keep girls talking for ages...

well i guess nadia tries to give us a reality check each time she talks to us about marriage, but alhamdulilah her marriage seems to be such a blessed one that you can't help but smile :) ...
however today we talked about the ills of having in-law's that have no fashion sense...all you people that are married, or have had loved ones that are married know what im talking about!

i can just imagine...me and mas sit around for hours planning out our ideal wedding......and our ideal ring :) Now imagine if your mother in law rolled up on the day of your engagement with a big fat GOLD ring...u know the fobby kind...i think id cry...

okay i come across sounding MAD superficial...but i actually dont think i really am all that superficial...its just a girl thing i guess..you expect a rock when you get engaged...but whatever, alhamdulilah i think if you got the right person no need to complain, a ring is just a ring.......right???

anyway yes...somehow our conversation drifted to food...and our complete and utter love for it...yes, i admit it, i am an ultimate fatty fatty fatso....but so what...i can't help it, alhamdulilah Allah subhana wa ta ala has created food for us to eat right, so why deny it? lol...worry not...we went on to talk about how we shouldn't eat as much as we do...and how we definately have to get off our butts and start working out...

so...here it is, in writing, i will try n not be such a fatty fatty fatso... :)

n with that...
pizza out ..

oops...i cant help it...food is just a natural part of me :)

Quran and babies

2005-02-18T23:51:00.000-05:00

Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,

Today masha'Allah se i think i heard the most beautiful recitation of the Qur'an by brother Nouman. And while i was in salah in complete and utter awe the baby next to me started crying...LOUDLY...and the bro keeps reciting and subhan'Allah he started to recite surah asr:

By (the Token of) Time (through the ages),
Verily Man is in loss,
Except such as have Faith, and do righteous deeds, and (join together) in the mutual teaching of Truth, and of Patience and Constancy.

and when he got to "Except such as have Faith, and do righteous deeds, and (join together) in the mutual teaching of Truth, and of Patience and Constancy. She stopped crying for a moment, as if trying to demonstrate her little patience :) but then subhan'Allah she started to cry again...

children are such a mercy :)
whats the point of everything i said...i duno...
i love babies and i love Quran :) :) :)

check this out : http://www.deen-intensive.com/files/Slides.mov the "sound track" is amazinggggg :) Makes you want to run from wherever you are and jus be in the presence of these amazing people, and just leeeeeeeeeeeeeeearn for hours n hours....sigh...one day insha'Allah.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah