Saturday, October 08, 2005

State of my Heart

I can only imagine what the scene is in Pakistan right now...

SubhanAllah it's amazing, I just now began to realize the severity of Hurricane Katrina, when another natural
disaster has come upon us. It is only now that I begin to realize that perhaps my heart has hardened or
become de sensitized to the suffering of others. My first reaction is always to worry about those that I
immediately know. in Katrina it was my family in Houston, and with this incident in Pakistan it is Maulana Kamal, Sobia Baji Hazratji, their families, and my own family. After my worries about that have alleviated, it is hard for me to hold on to
that feeling of anxiety and worry. Many times in my journalism classes I am taught that this is normal, and the
stories "closer to home" have to be sensationalized, while those not so close, can virtually be ignored, or left in
small ink. It kind of humiliates me to think that not only does his happen on a grand scale through the media,
and permeates the minds and hearts of those around me, but it disgusts me most to know that perhaps it
has paid its effect on me too :( I've tried to increase my dhikr and dua by asking Allah subhana wa ta ala to
soften my heart, but I still fear that I am amongst those that upon seeing the suffering of others, may for a
short time feel some sort of sadness, but after time forgets about the plight of others. I pray that I am not amongst those whose heart has hardened and fails to see the signs around her. I pray that I am not amongst those that forgets the suffering of humanity, and focuses, selfishly, only on herself.

May Allah subhaanahu wa ta 'aala forgive the souls of those who lost their lives and grant them the barakah of
Ramadan in their death and thereafter, and may He grant us all the wisdom to learn from this and the tawfiq to
act.

wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah