almost time to say goodbye...
Assalamualaikum wa rahmatullah,So the time is finally approaching, I have been avoiding writing about this for a while now because I don't quite know how to express my feelings on it. Within the past couple of weeks I have realized that I am afraid of change. I am not necessarily afraid of what is to come, but I am more afraid to let go of what I already have. Alhamdulilah the past four years of my life have been so so amazing...
When I first walked into the city I did not know what to expect. What I saw was a group of Muslims, very different from any group of Muslims I had met before. However I was still very reluctant and did not know if I had made the best decision by attending NYU. But here I am now, almost four years later, unable to let go and imagine life without the Muslims I have encountered. SubhanAllah...this kind of goes hand in hand with my last post. I spoke about blessings that somehow have been slipping away from my life, and sometimes I wonder if the Islamic Center will also be one of those blessings that will just slip through my hands.
I have also been told that this is not a denial of a blessing, rather it is simply change. However I can't just imagine this period of my life simply as a couple of years that will transition me into a new portion of my life. How can I? I met the most amazing Muslims, learned so much about my deen, about my Creator, and about my Rasool salalahualayhi wa salam through these individuals, how then can my heart not be attached to them?
Its amazing the advice that has been bestowed on us from our predecessors lasts and lasts. How many times have we been told to not take a single moment for granted, how many times have we been told that we will look back to these days with tears in our eyes. I look back at these days, and alhamdulilah I was bestowed with numerous opportunities to do good, to help others, and to sit with those who possess knowledge, and though I may have taken advantage of some of these opportunities, now I wonder how many of these opportunities I let fly by. This reminds me of the hadith that says to value five things: "Youth before old age, health before sickness, wealth before poverty, free time before preoccupation, and life before death." These four years of my undergraduate career were perhaps the prime of my youth, and the time when I would have the most amount of free time. Looking back, I really do wonder how wisely this time was spent, and if looking back on the Day of Judgement I will look back to these days with a smile on my face, or a tear stricken face...inshaAllah i do pray it is the former. and not the latter.
"There are seven people for whom Allah will provide His shade on the day when there will be no shade except His shade: 1. A just ruler. 2. A youth who grew up in the worship of Allah. 3. A man whose heart is attached to the mosque. 4. Two men who love each other for Allah's sake; they meet for the sake of Allah and part company for His sake. 5. A man who is invited by a woman of beauty and position [to sin], but he refuses saying: 'I fear Allah.' 6. A man who gives in charity secretly such that his left hand does not know what his right hand gives. 7. A man whose eyes shed tears as he remembers Allah in private." [Bukhari, Muslim].
Reading this hadith I think about my time at the IC, and think about how many opportunities were given to us as youth to aid one another in the worship of Allah subhana wa ta ala. Here we had a community based up of this single perogative. That is simply what we are, a group of youth dedicated to obeying Allah subhana wa ta ala, everything else is secondary. I think about the days that we would sit in the musallah waiting for Maghrib to roll in so that we could pray together (number 3), and perhaps one of the most closest points to my heart, number 4, two individuals who love each other for the sake of Allah subhana wa ta ala, they meet for his sake, and part of His sake. I think about the times I would just walk into the islamic center and would be greeted by salaams and smiles from sisters (and sometimes brothers) that I never met before, here we'd sit for His, subhana wa ta ala's sake, and in His name would we depart. I wonder, after I graduate how many more times I will be granted these same opportunities.
It has been said that you never know how valuable or great something is, until its gone. And here I am each witnessing each second slip from beneath me, knowing that in a matter of weeks I will no longer be part of this blessed community. I pray that Allah subhana wa ta ala continues to bless this group of youth, as well as the Islamic Center and allows it to flourish under the banner of Islam. I pray that those of us that now have to leave the Islamic Center (and NYU) have greater blessings in store for us, and that we too remain loyal first and foremost to Him and only Him.
Ameen.
wassalamualaikum wa rahmatullah.
posted by Iqra Bismi Rabbika @ 12:29 AM
Comments: 1
